daddy went to war when i was only three
that left ma alone to raise and bring up me
gave me all her love help me to be strong
and with all her wisdom taught me right from wrong.

she would stroke my hair as i lay in bed
i would fall a sleep as she stroke my head
hold me in her arms when i began to cry
give me all her love till the tears passed by

always make me smile when ever i was down
make me laugh again take away the frown
made me feel secure safe from any harm
with her loving way that made me feel so calm

always there to guide me teach me might right from wrong
with her loving way help me to be strong
as the years go by i will do the best i can
remember mamas ways as i become a man.

I think a lot.
I think about;
All the possible probabilities,
And all the choices that I've missed.

It's not being insecure,
Not with you,
It's always me about everything.
I just have a better front.

I always prefer openness,
No things left secret.
Without having to be asked about it.
Always wishing the same from others.

-HIY

If silence was ever to be described,
It would be a safe zone in a war.
The calm before the storm,
Or merely the anesthetics fueled in
Before you can start to feel the pain again.

Her silence was just different,
It shrieked in a tearing pain,
Also the numbs the body throughout.
Without voice; it's louder than anything you'll hear.
But you should be worried more when she breaks the silence; and breakout.

-HIY

It was misty
and gloomy
as though we had
lost rights to the sun
because we'd
misbehaved
and I got out of
my car to try and talk
to someone in charge
but the second my door
opened,
huge
heavy
raindrops
fell from the skies,
spat by angels at our
collective sin
and I tried to tell them
they had the wrong guy
but the rain just went
into my mouth and
made me choke
and I ran into the library
newly baptized and shivering
and an old man
all dry and sweatered
asked me
"It's it raining out there still?"

From the sixth floor on a Sunday
night you can see
the snake of green

lights switch to red, cars
jarred back a hundred
times stopped in tracks.

There is the jolt
when the robin's egg
cracks in my hands

that is the **** motion of waking
up from falling backwards. There
is the second hand, second

law of thermodynamic
arrow of time, the red
leaves want the earth

beneath them and sooner die
than go back up. There is sitting
cross-legged next to a jigsaw

waiting to see
why one can only wait
in one direction.

Of course, you can see
the traffic lights change
on other nights too,

but Sunday is the one I'm thinking of.

There's a thin line between obsession and love
Often hard to discern
Obsession sits in the bathroom while you ****
Love shoves a magazine under the door

When he comes home and tears a piece of you away like chipping wood of a bark
And tells you you’re not good enough, "You’re really not that smart"
Refuses to walk out of the way when you're crossing his path
And leers at your skin like you're a worn piece of art
Touches your body and calls you scarred
But if the sight of another man's eyes made my body unclean
Is the dirt from my body or those eyes that seen?
When he slams a fist in your face like its an old punching bag
Drags you by the hair like an overused rag
When he forces his way into you "It wasn’t that bad"
Why is he allowed to operate heavy machinery
When the sight of my naked legs can drive him mad
"She must have been asking for it" "They're meant for breeding"    
I am sorry the sound of my NO was so misleading
"Know your place" he says, women can't be leading
Remind him
That everything he can do, you can do bleeding
Remind him who you are and for what you are known
A force of nature that cannot be owned
The one they compare to the warships and the black widow
With the rage of the fire and the ice of the snow
Remind him.
That your storm will break his bravado if you just blew
For hurricanes were not named after him.
They're named
after
You.

summertime has never been my favorite.
the sun is too bright.
the days are too long.
public pools are *****.
and so are those men,
you know the ones.
the ones who you can't help but catch their eye.
the ones your fifteen year old mind had been conditioned to ignore.
the ones your twenty year old self has been told to smile for.
the strangers.
the fathers.
the uncles.
the family friends.
the men that made your mother tell you to close your legs for when you were ten because you were drawing attention.
the ones who shouldn't have been looking.