Polished and refined,
With death I have found
A life below ground
A place I can call mine
Destruction and evil deeds
A breeding of pure hate
Is all that I can create
Out of all these heartless seeds

I punch them in
To the deep sullen dirt
Water them with vengeance
And a sprinkling of hurt
Tonight is the night
I find what dwells below
I don't have a key
But I can bargain with my soul
As I place it into these seeds
I am but reeds in the grass
I'm letting go
Only Heaven knows
The blackness of Hell's wrath

I plant my lifeless soul in this plot
To groom it as it grows
So slowly that nobody knows
It's the place the devil goes to rot
Watered with tears, warmed with fire
And as time stands still, never changing
This fruition of evil continues growing
Until the depths of hell can go no higher

Then it will bloom
A flowering gloom
Growing out of control
The ground will harden
In this here garden
Fertilized by my soul

Ice* cold
Like my soul
     Growing older than old
  Melting away
         As the days get hotter
Why bother with the same things
      When everything changes
          And I can't escape the heat
   Of my heart as it finally feels
                   *Defeat

It's dark tonight
And I cannot breathe
The hands of time
Are slowly choking me
Tick Tick
Watch the color
Fade from my face
Tick Tock
Watch my body
Fall through space
Caught inside
These hands of time
Losing my grip
Losing my mind
Tick Tick
Why can't I see
What these hands
Want from me
Tick Tock
I'm fading fast
This life is just a memory
That can never last

Love* can conquer all
But so can *war
So be careful
What you wish for

I know you say your gods are not mine and that is reasonable

Still

You insist on sowing default saviors into my routine and bubbles do burst

Those ones used in absurdity
shortcuts for wonders
Blindsided and stricken of color

I mingle with despondency now and again because these notions create confusion

I lose track of myself once in awhile but it all makes room for weirdness and cathartic ranting

Smile for anger and confusion
love for the kind and honest
Sometimes it is okay to feel human

Met on an over pass
freaks of time
Night makes more sense
and we anticipate it's closure
A familiar stranger
catch up on names and crimes
Who did what and how much time

We revel in our respective delusions knowing life was never as it seems

We toss some stone for the sake of movement

Waves in the pond and they settle without a fight

I say farewell to a darker corner
I feel it's gaze as I make my way

Finally I'm released back into the world

relief found in it's inconsistency

Knowing a rational thought is hard to come by these days I strive for silence

But mouths keep moving

Inquiries keep getting progressively stranger

a truly savage way of bringing about ones end

Like a crowded room
voices fighting for the ceiling
and no words heard

The fallout is most severe for those confessing knowledge into artificial sunset

I presented a method for my madness and laughed myself out of the room

No bodies to witness my conclusion but I feel the past take stride

Finally

I see it falter and this DNA can once again be accommodating

Sleep was never my friend or enemy

But 48 hours without reprieve makes any soul stumble

Walking to kick lethargy I came across my childhood

It asked me where I've gone

Time took me away from you I say
Earlier than most
But such is life I suppose

We nod at nostalgia and part ways
both a little emptier
Rain shatters self pity
it left as fast as it came
Such is the prairie way

I found a puddle unusually clear deep inside a cities pollution

Reflection contradicts feeling
I suppose that was inevitable
Cannot deny ones nature

Crouching down to avoid reason
My knees crack loudly
reminding me of a 100 lives lived
Well worn past my 25 years

My skies turned abstract when dawn came

Pink and orange backdrop for this shadow

Moving over for a passing obstruction

I watch it swallow human excess
No flesh in sight for it's momentum
This is indeed skynet

I come home because walls keep out madness

In here only mine distracts
A dangerous illusion I know
But it's all I currently posses

You said you needed my soup

But I present my best and your faces melted onto my sneakers

I only had the pair so I now walk barefoot

I soon realized my predicament

This was an unknown land and I lacked public transportation

My space phone broke when I dropped the sky pool

So I chain smoke for signals
hoping for a reasonable excuse

Thumbs would be out but I have trouble trusting strangers

I make my way

Three fields of concrete
train track trance
Overalls with the greasy gloves
cold metal exposure

Finally I see an outlet mall horizon

Ten shops
two in working order

Past the thrift store with it's deceiving Lego sets

Reminding me of infinite childhood disappointment

Because the crucial pieces were always absent

Sneaker shop with the cross
Annoyed reception
See my ***** feet and gasp

Give me shoes I cry your Jesus demands it

My lack of religion horrified the shoe salesman

Who swore I would never wear his sandals

I say gods don't dictate kindness people do

I am acutely aware of my own hypocrisy

I laugh with the rest when presented with crocks

I hear their edible but a chew and a tooth goes flying

They throw me out the door saying I'm my own problem now

Now there's food for thought

As long as it comes fried and delicious I will hear myself out

I am an American after all