"Mom and Dad, I'm sorry;
I just can't take it anymore.
If you're reading this,
You must have busted down the door.

For too long I have suffered,
And you have never known.
You never saw that I was slipping,
Never heard a single moan.

All those friends you thought I had,
They were never really there.
But there was another girl-
This one that truly cared.

You may not have noticed,
But this girl cared enough to see
That I was locked up in depression,
And she tried to set me free.

'Don't take yourself from me!"
She begged, shedding another tear.
I told her she was selfish
to ask me to stay here.

Several times, she saved my life,
But this time it was no use.
Tell her not to blame herself;
The world tied my noose.

Tell her that I'm sorry;
I know she'll make it on her own.
Tell her I said, despite the pain,
She's the best friend I've ever known.

I'm sick of gasping at the surface,
so finally, I'll drown.
I'm ready to embrace my death
When silence triumphs sound."

My hand hovers over the paper.
I twist and flip the pencil in my hand.
My mind swims in images and words.
Colours and thoughts.

*but the paper remains blank

Destroy me softly in the dead of night.
Rip apart my thoughts with gentle words
and steady hands.

Do not question yourself,
I promise not to protest in return.

Ask me where my words are hidden,
how I bury them
and dig to them without pause so that my muscles won't have time to push you back.

Unearth my dreams,
ransack my heart until we are both covered in blood and truth.

I don't care how much it hurts,
turn my mind inside out and
force
every
thought into your palms.

Pry open those rusty hinges
because heaven knows I am just as clueless as you are to what lies behind them.

And I know, I know, I know
that what is underneath my skin is raw and pink.

Tell me how it tastes.

My heart
is swinging back and forth
between all the poignant memories
and the breaths of
ethereal emotions
of a soul
ablaze.

© Kishamore