When I wrote you this, I was in a really bad place
   do you remember?

My faith is practically dead right now, future me
   do you remember?

You're missing the woman you love that you lost
   do you remember?

She's that sparkle of gold stuck in your soul
   do you remember?

Or how strained things are between Kayla and you
   do you remember?

Remember that night you wanted to end it all?
   do you remember?

Have you come to terms with your friend's suicide, yet?
   do you remember?

You're going to be a warrior someday... I have to endure
   do you remember?

Has anyone wanted your love, your passion?
   do you remember?

I hope you're married by the time I read this again...
   do you remember?

Maybe you'll still be where I am now, stuck in love
   do you remember?

Just know it was worth it, loving her. Even though she's lost...
   *do you remember?

He had given her his
Everything
And it killed him
Requiem
This is how love kills

Sixty words per minute// no errors
Five hundred plus poems// written
Thousand firm handshakes// given
Countless prayers cried out// frantic
And if you ever saw me work// well
You'd be surprised

when i was little my dad used to
call himself God, used to tell me
airplanes were bumblebees, told
me "bored" was just a plank of wood
so that was impossible--
never mumble, use an inside voice
but there's an outside voice, but
i never learned to speak with
conviction from him--

lately i've been calling my brothers
the weeds back there are taking over,
the spiders are everywhere,
god, zak, my heart is breaking
god, little sister I wish I was there, but
I'm not girly.

people used to tell me to howl at the moon
but i've always been afraid of my  own voice
always wanted to scream but replaced the urge
with a smile

be blameless and innocent? Lord, I've been trying
but you can't force what you ain't,
tryin' doesn't seem to be enough for you either
but i've come to find i don't know you as well as
i thought, so bear with me while
I am, while I am
tryin'

I think I'm ready to surrender,
to raise my white banner,
done with pushing you away,
open up to you once more.

You already know my wounds,
the deep scars I carry,
I'll let you touch them tenderly,
I won't lock you out.

See, I only felt love; I forgot to show,
Love is also an action, sacrifice,
I let go of you and held onto myself,
But I miss you and long for you.

I don't care how ugly you say you are,
you're ******* beautiful in my eyes,
and if you're messed up, so am I,
I'm with you always.

**~Your best friend