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 Feb 2016 AJ
Viseract
I scared you?
How could this be?
This isn't what I wanted to be
I'm a monster, can't you see?
Should not be allowed to breathe freely

Look around, look down, look up to the sky
Just want to be happy and live a happy life
But instead I am trapped and now I live a lie
Probably the best option is just to ******* die

If this is my destiny,
Because my kindness gets the best of me
And I've devolved into a monster
And I just wanna rest in peace
And not tear anyone else to pieces

What have I done and who am I now?
A demon by accident, lives being devoured

I didn't want to be like this, I just cared about you
An ambulance was in your street
What the **** else was I supposed to do?

If someone that you loved was feeling pretty bad
And a message from two weeks ago was all that you had
Wouldn't you be concerned?
Or would you just sit there?
They could be ******* dying and you wouldn't even care?!

Sorry if it seems wrong, to actually give a ****
About someone to the point that you wanna lend a hand
I'm sorry that my actions had you running scared
But I'm not sorry for the fact that I actually ******* cared

Out of genuine concern
Someone that I love is hurt
The pain of it makes my heart burn
I'm shutting down, signal red alert

So what are we now? Where do we stand?
Because to me this whole incident is rather unfair
I did what I did because I actually care
Not saying you're stupid but you misunderstand

I only wanted the best for you
Without considering the best for me
The rest of me
Contesting me
Condemning me
To solitary

It's just too painful to deal with alone,
If there were any way I could atone...

For actually caring, for not being cold
I'm done with this argument it's getting ******* old!

So I'll say it once again
I only wanted to be your friend
I've explained enough, I won't repeat
Because it burns my heart and I feel the heat

Out of genuine concern
Someone that I love is hurt
The pain of it makes my heart burn
I'm shutting down, signal red alert
Seriously. sorry that you misinterpreted my actions, but I'm ******* that no-one listens to me and that people are spreading rumours about me
 Feb 2016 AJ
Graff1980
Untitled
 Feb 2016 AJ
Graff1980
Who can judge the sin of it
When sorrow turns to rage
When grief runs red
Such spirits dead
And flesh will not
Come home again
You will name him enemy
See his sand streaked skin
Miss the heart and human
That lives within
With all that hate and judging
Lose reason and empathy

Who can judge the pain of it
When bombs lay children to rest
You will call them enemy
Or collateral damage
I call them all my family
And resign myself from your inhumanity
 Feb 2016 AJ
Emily Jones
You're like that last piece of sugarfree gum
That you keep in your pocket until the wrapper is frayed
Sticking to the inside of the pocket
Ruining a good pair of jeans
Like a spot of bleach on a black tee
No longer good enough for public
Lingering like bad breath after a  meal
I'm ready to be through.
 Feb 2016 AJ
cf
I miss me
 Feb 2016 AJ
cf
I hate to say
I love him so much
that I am not myself without him
I love him so much
that I am not human without him

my legs are immobile
my heart shudders instead of beating
my hands shake in steady vibrations

I love him so much
that I lose another interest each day
to make sure nothing ever comes before him
I love him so much
that I have stopped loving myself
so that he is the only person I need to care for
I love him so much
that I no longer exist
I am killing myself
by loving him
I miss who I am, who I was, and who I'll never be again after him
Traces of a diluted former joy, form a pattern across her face.
I can see it, I recognise it in my own face after-all.

Her pale blue eyes glance at me and then skirt away, silently
with a look that says 'bite'.
'Powerful Crystalline orbs of light',
- from lady of the lighthouse.  

Yet;
Curled up in spiral spaces, away from the movement of bustling outside.
She sits, attentive, alert, upon her spiral staircase.

Lighthouse stacked with books, her sensitivity marked within surface of page and pen.
She sends out beacons. She reads, She writes, She saves. She cares,
Actually.

Her soul comes rooted from the rings of trees and can be glimpsed
on silent nights to those who have the eyes to see;
Noble, wise, Scholarly, Strong, kind.
Absence-  'Melancholy Tree'
currently lacking roots?

Now: To pale blue eyes, I say this is where it hurts, and I'm sorry, truly.

Absence is: Room reverberating with loss, memories of a time gone past,
an excavated minute. A man who meant the Earth to her, 'More than that' she whispers quietly from the dream, the spiral staircase, the lighthouse where she still sits shuddering, cold, lonely, still, still.
Sending out beacons, never letting others in.

Her eyes are strong, focused, attentive, she sees each detail yet still she
misses moments of magic, when our two worlds collapse inwards,
glimpsing a zenlike nothing and everything at once.

Getting lost in that mystery, the cloak of trees, reverberating.

The deep breeze, the ground beneath our feet.

The air, the sea, the wind, the trees.
Freedom, maybe.

Through winds that blow here, now,
Love of the world which chose to bring her in whispers quietly -

Your Future Now:
Peace for pale blue eyes,
No more skirting in concrete corridors of mind.

These are my desires for you -
Resolution - Breathe, Live.

A tactile unfolding.
New Year. New You.
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