angst and tragedy
all once seemed so
romantic,
so
poetic

and now i wish
i could rip the blade from
the fingertips
of my
past

and slap her straight,
explain that

blood is only blood,

and pain will not
make
you
beautiful.

I see you all the time.
I see you in crowded cafeterias and I remember you getting up to get sweet tea
I see you in open fields and I remember memories made at that little camp
I see you on empty concrete curbs like where we sat when we talked that Wednesday night.
I see you when I look at empty beds and I remember how you used to lay on your stomach and glance and smile at me.
I see you in full pews and empty alters and I remember how you were too nervous to walk to the alter.
I see you post pictures alone (without me) and I wonder if they look as empty to you as they make me feel
It's been 159 hours since I last saw you and all I can say is I miss you more than anything.

your words,
they have the power
to rattle around in my head.
but your silence,
that has far more power.
the power to rip apart my ribcage.
extract energy from my body.
force waterfalls from my eyes.
and spill worries from my mind.
i'd prefer your harsh words
over your unspoken words.