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Leandra Dec 2018
I knew the kisses weren't for me but they were for her lips
The "I love you" was supposed to be heard by her ears and not mine
When you held me, you saw her instead of me
Because you didn't love me
You didn't want me
But I was the "BEST" second choice
I'm sorry that I wasn't her
That you weren't in love with me
That I am in love with you
I'm sorry
  Jan 2018 Leandra
Dyana williams
"goodbye"
you whisper goodbye
the words quite could not come out
all they hear was your breath blowing in their soft ear
"goodbye"
you whispered again
saying them words
is like a mouth full of poison
it's killing you as you speak
such bitter-sweet don't you think
your mouth was numb
you could no longer speak
"g-g-goodbye"
you stutter
not wanting it to be your last
it's so repulsive yes I know
saying those words then letting go
Leandra Jan 2018
I don't want to fall in love
Not with you
Not with anyone
It doesn't matter how much **** you say to me
About how much you love me which is a ******* lie
Or how much you need me which you don't
It doesn't matter and it never will
sigh
I don't want to be hurt anymore
I'm tired of going to sleep with tears on pillows
Pain in my heart
You on my mind
I'm tired of all this *******
That you so kindly give me
I'm tired of love
But guess what.......
crying
I'm in love with you.......
OOOOOOOof
  Sep 2017 Leandra
Nat Lipstadt
Why I Always Carry Tissues

To My Children:

I'm laughing at myself,
As I am prone to do because
Why I Always Carry Tissues
Is the title of a poem
I write for you.

There is a story here,
Of parenting, and responsibilties
That transcends yourself, defines me,
Vis-a-vis you,
then and there, and maybe now.

When you were small,
I took you by the hand,
The cement canyons, trails & rivers
of West Eighty Six Street,
Together, we would ford.

Periodically, as Fathers are prone to do,
Your hand, from my hand,
I would release
So you could fall down,
All on your own.

It bemused me that I could see
Three or four paces ahead of thee
Exactly which crack,
Upon which you would trip,
And come crying back to me.

Back-to-me.
That was then.
And now,
Yes, no more,
Back-to-me.

But I always had tissues
to dry your eyes
And no surprise,
I still do,
Always will.

These days, they,
more likely used to dry mine,
As I have forded that Styxy river,
When crossed, you spend more of the day,
Liking Back more,
Then looking ahead.

No matter, by right and tradition,
It is still my mission, that
when you need, when you bleed,
as I know you surely shall,
These pocket tissues will be there
Ready, willing and able, fully capable,
of snatching away your tears.

When you need,
When you bleed,
And you surely shall,
These pockets of mine,
Of tissue made,
Are waiting for your tears,
And you, to fill them,
For without them,
Their raison d'etre is unfulfilled.


These used tissues are my history book,
Re the art of loving, and the arch-i-texture of life,
Of tears and hearts,
And concrete spills,
That need knees to be complete.

That is why you will find me, without fail,
Ready, willing and able, holding my
White Badge of Courage at the ready,
Waiting patiently, for my mission to be redeemed,
Missions known as parenting schemes.

The scheme is clear, even if
my tissues you no longer request,
You will let your own babies
fall n' fail, then take their tears
Put them in your pocket,
keep them forever wet,
Like my memories of you
the ones I cherish best...

Perhaps a tradition
We will start,
Unsightly bulges in our pocket rear,
Where we will store our packet of saver-saviors
Removers of our dear one's fears.

If we are truly wise
Those tissued memories
We will keep,
Die among them contented,
Knee-scraped deep
When tears fall...



2008
1. Written in 2008, updated today 7/2013, adding a word here and there.
2. When I wrote this, there were no more babies in my life; now the next generation, a new set of boo-boos
3. Yes, I still, always have tissues on me someplace,
a habit started over thirty years ago,
when my children where toddlers.
4. The poem I love the best.
Leandra Sep 2017
I can't breathe
gasp
I feel the water fill my lungs
panicking
I can't see anything around me
Searching
It's overwhelming me
screams
It's surrounding me
breathes in
I hit my back on something
opens eyes
Something soft
breathes slowly
I'm okay
smiles lightly
It was only a dream
Nightmares.......
Leandra Sep 2017
Remember when you said people lose people.

Yeah........

Well..... I'm ready to lose you.

Ok... I'm not holding you back.

Alright.

Then goodbye........

( I wish you could see my face when you sent me that message. I wish you could see me die when I realized you were right. We weren't meant to be and we were holding on to something that will never happen. It was just a hope, a beg. It was just a dream.......)
This is a representation of messages that I got this weekend. I learned that day that you can never trust someone even if they were your best friend for five years. They will **** you slowly.
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