Dyana williams

Jan 2018

zoie marie lynn

"the title says it all,"
she says, breaking the fourth wall.
"i was with a guy,
i know i know, so cliche,
but he really took my breath away."
the audience laughs,
she continued on,
"he told me all these enhancing things,
and at first i didn't know what to think.
the first date was a disaster,
i spilt wine all over my dress,
and the second went a little better,
but the third one was the best."
the audience anticipated the rest,
"on the 29th of September,
he got sick,"
her breath hitched,
"he told me not to worry,
as he layed in that hospital bed,
hooked up to so many tubes,
he'd say anything to get these thoughts out of my head.
he told me he knew all along,
that he had one month left to live,
i broke to a million pieces,
'but it was so worth it,'
he said lovingly as he coughed his last cough.
i thought of nothing else but the way he looked
hooked up like some middle school kid's science project,
and now here i am,
at this amazing poetry slam,
telling you all my story,
because it could be days, weeks, or even years until you discover your forever,
but for me,
mine was simply a month to remember."

babe, stay

#love #fate #cancer #death #sick #sickness #poem #poetry

Dyana williams Jan 2018

scarred mistake

He cut to deep
now she is scarred
that scar has a story and here it starts.
A usual love story but it was quite different
Their love wasn't love it was


   lust

it was a deep feeling down in their gut
and those      "l
                        o
                         v
                         e
                         r
                            s "
did what "l
                     o
                           v
                                  e
                                      r
                                           s "
do
day and night they stayed by each others side
           not knowing all those I love yous were lies
of course, then it came to what everybody does best
then they started making      l
                                              o
                                               v
                                                e
every night and day
then he told her that everything he said was fake,
and all he wanted to do was take her virginity away
he left her in tears
he did not care
she started to feel sick
come to find out she was pregnant,
pregnant with his child
the person she hates
now she hates that baby
and says he is a mistake
that baby is her scarred mistake

Dyana williams Jan 2018

Goodbye

"goodbye"
you whisper goodbye
the words quite could not come out
all they hear was your breath blowing in their soft ear
"goodbye"
you whispered again
saying them words
is like a mouth full of poison
it's killing you as you speak
such bitter-sweet don't you think
your mouth was numb
you could no longer speak
"g-g-goodbye"
you stutter
not wanting it to be your last
it's so repulsive yes I know
saying those words then letting go

#goodbye #love

Dyana williams Jan 2018

The soon to be dead girl

The world is now black and white
her eyes were stripped from the happy sight
her arms and thighs were filled with depressions art
her mind was filled with society heart
her tears were filled with her insincerity
her mouth was filled with a ton of lies
Her heart was no longer alive
people told her she would be just fine
she looked at them and started to cry
she whispered into their ear
don't you cry when I'm no longer alive
so hears my last goodbye
she picked up the gun
put it to her head
pulled the trigger
now she is laying dead
in front of them

Dyana williams

#brookengirl #

Jan 2018

zoie marie lynn

my therapist says i have ADHD

i told my therapist about you,
while your lips were still slathered alllll over my body.
i showed her the places we had been,
and all the things we had seen.
i told her what lies underneath that pretty
                                              pretty
skin of yours,
and i told her how i knew.
i spelt out your name as she scribbled it on her cute little clipboard,
i told her about the   first     night
and the      second
and the   fourth
and that time in the closet.
i told her everything,
i really just wanted to   get
                                                  you
                                      out
of my brain,
it didn't matter if saying these things put me in  sososo  much pain.
because you've  moved   on  so why can't i?
i told my therapist about you,
but i still can't tell you
                                           goodbye.
i know i'm  s t u p i d,
for holding on this l
                               o
                                n
                                 g,
i know it's useless,
for wishing you weren't                              gone.
but my words carry on like a heartbeat
s     l      o      w
steady
                          fast
u   s   e   d
  n    t   a   y
i   keep   keep   keep  breaking and breaking and breaking and
i told my therapist about you.

i think part of the reason why we hold onto something so tight is because we fear something that great will never ever happen twice

****
i was in so much pain when i wrote this, my lover had just left with two years of my life and i felt so so so alone. i chewed through therapists constantly, they left me behind because i was too broken to fix. i hated them all. but there was this one, this one singular human being that listened to me. she didn't flinch, she didn't look at me like i was a broken puppy left for death. she just listened. i was all over the place, but i managed to lay out my entire mind for her to dissect. and she did. she helped me so so much, and i could never repay her enough for how she has helped me. when i got home, i wrote the basics of this. it was like 12:30 when i wrote it and i couldn't sleep the next night so i decided to make this look exactly how i felt when i wrote it the night before. how my lover made me feel for so long. so i did. i was crying mountains, i was hyperventilating, i threw my phone through the wall. i put all my anger, blood, tears in each letter, each space. i put it all in there and then posted it a couple weeks later. i didn't show anyone. i just put it out there, hoping my lover would see it. but it didn't even matter cause when i woke up, the whole world saw it instead. thank you. i love you all.

#you #her #me #therapy #pain #love #gone #poetry #poets #poem

Dyana williams Jan 2018

You dont know her

You dont really know her
you dont know anything
not a thought that sans her brain
not the reason she screams in vain or,
why she carvs depression art into the black canvas
called her arms
you dont know the memories that cross her mind
dont say you know her if you dont know what
happens behind the fake smile

Dyana Williams

Dyana williams Dec 2017

My Book

You flip through the pages of my book you're looking for that certain page
to finish your search
But all you could find is Pages blank not even a drop of ink
Right then and there you knew it was a perfect book to put an end to
you put my book on a shelf
and looked at it
and thought I could use some help
You wrote and wrote into those blank lines and into my mind
you wrote that you loved my book
but we all knew that was a lie you said you love the way my pages were formed
and how ink wrote on them so perfectly
you said my title was observed but you loved all the tiny little curves
you put me back on the shelf
and said I no longer need your help you lost your interest
and now all I do is sit on a old dusty Shelf
I sat with many other books
the one on the left her title was I'm not good enough
the one on the right her title was the Lone Wolf
And mine a young girl in a lonely world

Pt.1