one: isn't she just gorgeous?
two: i bought her the best clothes i could afford. i know she can't really appreciate them now, but i wanted her to look nice.
three: look at that smile, she's definitely one of God's beautiful angels
four: she looks so peaceful.
five: go be loud somewhere else, this isn't the occasion
six: thank you for the gifts, they're truly appreciated.
seven: i haven't been able to properly leave my house in a week, i've just had so much to do to prepare.
eight: her brother and sister brought a teddy bear for her, it's one of the softest things i've ever felt.
nine: i wish my father could have been here, i haven't seen him in such a long time.
ten: i just got her baptized.
eleven: i think the flower headband is a bit much, don't you? i mean, it's pretty, but i don't think it's necessary- she's pretty enough as is.
twelve: i'm going to be stuck at home for a long time after this, aren't i?
thirteen: when does the pain start going away?
fourteen: i haven't had time to take a shower in the past few days, it's been too difficult.
fifteen: come give your little sister a kiss. yes, i know she looks kind of funny but she's still your sister.
sixteen: these bills are going to be expensive
seventeen: i'm not sure what to do next.
eighteen: it's awfully cold in here.
nineteen: i've been tired for days
twenty:  look at my beautiful baby girl!

I miss who I was before I met you. Before you were here I used to smile at seasons changing, now I dread the colder days.

2. I used to miss your laughter, now I miss the silence in my head. You once were my form of meditation, now I spend the days coloring because someone said it can be a type of therapy and Lord knows my therapist is tired of hearing the same story of a boy who keeps stealing my identity.

3. I miss you giving me the cold shoulder because I miss not being around you. I miss the days spent alone in my room reading novels so unrealistic but so desirable. Now I want nothing to do with anything because love is a four letter word and each letter stands for another reason that you couldn't stay.

4. I miss you before me. She loved you quite a bit.

5. I miss not writing about you. I used to stay afloat in my own but now I'm drowning in all the poetry that breaks me like your promises.

6. I miss waking without a reminder that I was never good enough and will never be good enough.

7. I miss my innocence. I reminisce on the times when I was oblivious to the evil in the world.

8. I miss belonging to myself. Because I know you're gone now but I still can't become my own. I can't get used to waking up alone.

9. I miss my laughter. The laughter you stole from me. I can't laugh at any jokes when my whole life has become one.

10. I miss the you before you became who you are now. You used to sing me to sleep and now you're the monster under my bed. You're the missed phone calls. You're the days spent at home alone. My mom asks me why I don't go out anymore, but she doesn't get it. I don't know why I'm surprised. I don't even get it.

22 WAYS ON HOW TO KEEP A RELATIONSHIP
1. Build trust
2. Be honest
3. Be faithful
4. Be considerate
5. Respect each other
6. Become best friends
7. Be proud of one another
8. Be there for one another
9. Bear each other’s burden
10. Make time for one another
11. Communicate to each other
12. Trust and always pray to God
13. Accept each other’s mistakes
14. Appreciate each other’s effort
15. Take time and study each other
16. Love each other
unconditionally
17. Refresh your love with surprises
18. Talk about things, both good and bad
19. Know that you won’t always be happy
20. Know that having arguments are normal
21. Forgive and forget each other’s mistakes
22. Leave the past to the past, which
include ex’s.

when you find the time
to take me back
to times like these,
i will wait for you underneath the yellow oak tree.
i will sit beneath thousands of constellations,
and watch you paint dragonflies into the sky -
as if the colours splattered around your palette
were taken from the stars, themselves.
i will run against the midnight breeze,
and gaze ahead as your shadow wraps itself around mine.
i will keep a close eye on the moon
for fear of it fading too fast.
(i still believe it would not dare.)
and when the dawn shatters the night's blank canvas,
we will burn out quietly,
not with a bang
but with a whisper meant to be heard
only by those who dare
to listen.

Sometimes i cant b r e a t h e

and i think, maybe
there is water clogging the bottom
of my lungs

Sometimes i cant h e a r

so i try to take
the cotton ***** out of
my ears
and make the rush of noises
disappear

Sometimes i cant t a l k

when my words fall
over each other i
zip my mouth shut and
hope for the best

Sometimes i cant b e

who i want
to be
and i think
there is no
solution
to this

The past is a lie.
Don't let it bother you.
There are no facts,
only memories we create
and call the past.
Some memories are benign;
others are feral,
hidden in the landscape
waiting to attack.
You invented the past;
you can let it go.
Instead, take the shining path.
Live in the last, best
country of Now.
It is green and real.
It is radiant and full.
It loves you, body and heart.
It wants you to be happy
and if you are sad,
it is because of the past
that you invented,
that you still cling to,
that only you can destroy.
**** it. Walk away. Be free.
Now is the time that matters,
the only time
that belongs to you.
    ~mce

∞ according to the order of operations,
(your name) belongs in parentheses since it is always the first thing i think about when i wake up
which works out, because it also looks just like the smile on my face the instant you walk in a room :)

∞ through all the ups and downs, all the positives and negatives of this fickle thing called love
|the light in your eyes| is the only absolute i'm sure of

∞ i can't calculate how you became an integral part of my life in such a small number of days
nor can i differentiate between the rising sun and your blinding smile
but every moment you're not here reminds me that i can't f(without you)
and i swear there's no limit to the distance i'd travel, whether it be three months or five thousand miles

∞ i get why they use an exclamation point in factorials now
because nothing makes me happier than counting down and multiplying the reasons I fall 4! you every 3! seconds, giving thanks 2! the stars that i somehow 1! my way into your heart

∞ so often, i have found myself divided by the fear of being loved and the fear of being alone
which is still only a fraction of the anxiety i feel when i think about the possibility of disappointing you,
but you are the better half of me,
and i can only hope to reciprocate the endless joy you've brought into my little world

∞ i've spent a lot of time stumped by the different branches of mathematics,
but you are the root of my confusion
for even though your legs stand firm and your arms are steadier than logs,
i can't figure out how your hand fits so gently in mine like perfect symme-tree

∞ i want to hold you so close they call it a sin
cos i love how your body curves around me
and how you never stop listening when my thoughts go on a tangent
and how you have acute, pardon my language, angle-side-side

∞ there are sum nights when i tally sheep instead of sleeping
because you've proven that 1 + 1 equals too much happiness for a heart to carry
but the only thing that doesn't quite add up is how six months can seem like no time at all
yet being with you makes it feel like infinity