Don't give up on me. Please.
I'm begging you.
I know that look.
You're shutting down.
I've made promises before,
And I've meant them 100%, every time.
But my faults prevail. I know them well.
So do you. I've promised to get help,
And I did. It failed... I failed...
I failed myself and in so doing,
I've failed you.
But please, don't give up on me.
I know I can change, but I don't know how.
I've tried. I went back to my old prayers,
To professionals, to my innermost self.
I've worked on it so many times,
Alone and with others,
But never with you.
You distanced yourself from my troubles,
Even though you were an intricate part.
You had a stake in this.
You have a stake in this.
Don't give up on me.
You'll see.
I'll be me again, before the troubles.
But what's to become of me,
If you give up on me.
Don't! Please!

How do I tell you I want to die, without handing you the gun?

I’d close my book, pick the prettiest font for The End. Dust to dust

I wasn't the flower in a vase,
          more like in amber,

Captured within a vessel
of unreachable ambiguity.

I was seen but not heard,
                a silent movie of beauty,

That screamed silently,

                                  but was
         smiling on the outside.

My other half, was the remote,
                 batteries never inserted
so instead hitting the screen but

not where bruises could be seen..

For perfection shouldn't be blemished.


They didn't have a mute button,
   only loud when alone..

"Morning,

Was the catalyst for the repercussions
         of anothers manners,

         but I never answered back,

but still I was flirting with my looks..

I'm freely caged, never able to fly..
       Instead I perch clipped wings

never aloud to fly beyond there eyesight.

Expelled before I could haunt
your time,
             I wanted to be within you.

Wanting to wonder your halls,
         but I wasn't given time

to

show you that not every floor board
    was creepy, I just wanted to show


that you weren't alone,
                            what did I have to lose
I was no body..

But you exorcized your right,
           had that cloth man come

in your house...

But I showed him
                     that there is more
than one way to

                           defrock a cloth...


I locked him in his mind,
for a man of god there were some
                       dark things in there to
keep him in purgatory
                                 for more than this life time.

I touched your face,
                        it wasn't cold but warmth,


            never to harm but to keep safely
from those who'd do you harm.

A ring spins on the floor, words circular
at speed spelling out in blurred exhaustion.


                                                       I love you....

A joke to choke on

I felt the child grow between the cracks of trauma. Filling in the gaps, sweeping out the excess. Womb full of life when only death was promised to me. I watched winter come and go, and with it you went. I felt the hunger grow between the cracks of trauma. Filling in the gaps, sweeping out the excess.

Charles didn't heed the Puritans
He was God's appointed,
Anointed and empowered.
He tumbled from above,
Down through the law,
Lost his head.

Nicholas was placed in the basement crypt,
A cult-like condemnation;
So they stood him against the wall,
He listed to his Monk,
His reasoning debunked,
So they shot the anointed one
On his golden throne.

Benito was above the law,
High on meat hooks.
Could we dare to look?

If you were lucky,
If you were tied to a stake,
And the ******* ignited,
Someone dear would tie a bag
Of gunpowder around your neck.
Why let the crows pick out his eyes,
Make golden nests from his hair.
End the torture. Pull the life-line.
Sever the head from the body politic.
It is the righteous thing to do;
It is the civil thing to do
In pensive state.
Rise up from your ashes.
It is the kindest cut of all.

Why do your words feel like slaps on my wrists, hands and fingertips.

Carpet burned knees
Puking next to the trees
Paying the fee
For feminity