The history is written in the lines on your face
My fingers trace the furrowed brow
The giggles in your dimples
The beauty of your memories
I can touch your laughter
I taste the tears running down your cheeks
Was it my words that made you cry?
Let my thoughts be the smile in your minds eye.

I can't compete with the demons in your head,
Where fools rush in and angels fear to tread.
Thoughts of me don't reach the sacred heart of your bed.
It's like walking a tightrope on silk thread.
What are you scared of ..losing your mind...is that what you dread?
Now is the time to listen to your heart instead of the voices in your head.

Delicate little dragon
Sit beside me
Tell me what's up
Whisper your words
So they don't burn
I'll lend you my ear
Make my tears evaporate
Invigorate your wings
It's time for us both to fly

Someone smiled at me today
Someone smiled at me...really smiled
A wide open smile
An honest smile
A lovely kind smile
A smile that said I like you
A smile that said I value you
A smile that said I'm here to stay
A smile that said it's  good to know you
A smile that said I'm not going anywhere
A smile that said smile back at me
I stood there for a while
Then stepped back from the mirror.

Maeve the brave

Descended from a long line of strong women
Rooted in the wild beauty running through her ancestors homeland
You can't help smiling as you despair
When you are awoken at some ungodly hour
This otherworldly being with a halo of golden hair... a breath of fresh air
Can't but help imagine the smile on the faces of the mothers who have gone before
She walks with the confidence and
Self belief of one who knows exactly why she is here
You can't help smiling as you despair
When you are awoken at some ungodly hour
She isn't just here...she grabs life roughly in both hands
Shakes the living day lights out of every day
A true warrior in all her glorious Colours,moods and textures
She makes you believe in a magical world where the impossible becomes possible
So when she wakes you at some ungodly hour smile and take heart
For you are in for an interesting day
With the savage beauty called Maeve

I looked at it in wonder,
then carefully wrapped it up in tissue
and placed it on a shelf called some other day.
I held it in my hand for a while,
then folded it in brown paper ******* with string
and hid it in a drawer called one day.
I sat and wore it on my face
then boxed it up labelled it with words
and put it to the back of the cupboard called yesterday.
I gave it to you for a time,
then you handed it back with a smile.
Show it to everyone in your world called today.

I will walk down that road
Because I can finally see
What you were trying to do to me
Then you will be able to see too
What you are supposed to do
You know in your heart
You knew at the start
We spent too long apart
I was blind you see
Blinded by the tears of grief
You didn't see beneath
You didn't scratch the surface to see what was underneath
I thought you were giving me my self belief
You were greedy thinking two was a better number than one
When all is said and done
And you have had your fun
I'm still not going to be number one
Where was your strength and courage to belong
I opened up my chest let you hold that heart
Where blood exchanged for a part of you
So you run through my veins you gave me life when all was lost
I held on to hope at all costs
Now all the blood has drained away
I realise you weren't meant to stay
And you and me have had our day
I won't forget what's in my head
I will hold it high as I walk on by
Down my path with a clear blue sky
my path will follow a different route from the one I thought
I will take the lessons I've been taught
The only thing I have are questions to ask
To ask of myself
I will open my eyes and live the life I dreamed
Of the destiny not the uncertainty
So on this note I will leave
for I no longer believe in the us you thought we could achieve
Don't look back in anger
Look forward and remember
What was good...
honour our memory
For you never really belonged to me.

I have a memory on my mouth
A kiss that branded lips
A whisper that stirred these hips
Words tantalise then slowly drip
Your desire an intoxicating mix
Entirely whole
Fingers click I close my eyes
A conjurors trick
you and I the perfect fit

By the light of a sequinned moon
She had forgotten to remember
All the stars in her eyes danced to a different tune
Her feet stepped in time to the beat of her heart
Her tears dripped on the ground he walked on
Splashing then evaporating testing and informing
Candy floss clouds could no longer sweeten
Was it worth it to worship the footprints?
Her merry go round went round and round
Her memory she saw with his seesaw swing
The helter-skelter no longer sheltered
Her childhood dreams
Time to let this caged bird swim instead of sink
In the muddy puddles of his pain full eyes
And the silent words written on his skin

Woken up,
Weary bones.
Lump in throat.
Miss you now.
Missed you yesterday.
Miss you more tomorrow.
Head is full,
Full of you.
Heart hurts.
Huge big hole.
Too big to fill,
With anyone but you.

You won't see me again
But you will search every day
You taste the regret
In the words you never said
You dream me into reality
Then wake with empty arms

I saw you walking down the road
Yes you
with your crumpled shirt and your dishevelled hair
Hurrying scurrying wearing a blank look and vacant stare
Yes you
I saw you running then stop when you noticed me
You thought it was too early for anyone but the birds to see
Yes you
With the sleep in your red rimmed eyes
Checking your watch as the seconds fly by
Yes you
With the taste of yesterday still on your skin
Thinking just another few steps to sneak back in
I saw you walking down the road
Yes you
Head bowed with your fringe covering your face
A few more yards to turn the key to the safety of your own place
You didn't see me walking towards you
Yes me
You didn't expect to find me waiting so soon
You thought a little sleep then much later on this afternoon
Yes me
The one whose there waiting patiently
The one you know is there but you don't always see
Yes me
The one you ran into so early today
Perhaps now it's time for you to listen to what I have to say
Yes you
As you walk up the stairs to the stillness of your own bed
Yes me
If you listen to your heart as well as your head
A perfect peace you may find instead
Yes me
Next time you bump into me look me in the eye and smile
For I am your conscious...I'll be here for a while.

When I look in the mirror
I see her looking back at me
Arms outstretched reaching out for me
Eyes watching over me
Ears listening out for me
Mouth whispering to me
Time turning back to me
The days are moving forward
Time is ticking on
I've woken up
She's still gone.

Can you steer me away from the fear?
The pounding heart that starts
In the pit of my stomach it's
Debilitating irritating unfulfilling  
Anxiety spilling out
Drilling into my brain
Pounding ticking
Tick tick tick tock
Locked in shut out
I'm looking in but left out
in the cold
Shivering
frightened of fright itself
I'd like to bottle it
Put it on a shelf to gather dust
Standing beside myself
Looking at the shelf
I'm talking to myself
Am I selfish or selfless
Helpless or hopeless
I'd like the road I'm walking down
To be the path home
I'd welcome me with open arms
To totally disarm
I'd wrap me up in the comfort
I'd let me sigh and smile
And sit and just be me for a while

When you open the curtains shake of the night
Let the day break into the darkness of  your dreams
Let the sun burn a hole in the troubles of yesterday
Breathe in the newness of the hours you have been given
Let the shadows lengthen friendships strengthen
Smooth out the creases of spiteful words
Reclaim the joy of an unblemished day

No skin on which to place my lips,
No hands to rest upon your hips,
No legs to walk towards me,
No ear to hear your whispers,
No hair to wind around your hands,
No feet with which to step on your toes ,
No mouth to kiss me on the nose,
No waist to wrap your arms around,
No spine to run my fingers down,
No neck for me to rest my face,
No elbows to brush your thighs,
No face to see my smiling eyes.
But what I have are memories in my head,
Of everything you have ever said.

Face serene in its beauty
Pain etched on her perfect porcelain skin
Smile gives away her vulnerability
Fragility surfacing from deep within

One life. One chance. One me. One you. One love. One question. One or two?

Missed chances
No second glances
Rewind the tape
Can't we escape
The childhood restraints
The loud mouthed complaints
The hate filled debate
The box of constraints
The mothers tug of war
Couldn't they see what we saw?
There was so much more to give
Two lives to live
Forever entwined
What would you do if you could rewind
Turn the hands back
Minds open as hearts beat
We can't let anyone defeat
We have the full circle to complete
Why did they compete
Heart strings pulled until the snapped
Umbilical chord her discord
Like bungee rope
It left no scope
Only self doubt no hope
I walked forward with a space at my side
Something inside withered then died
I wanted you to see the resurrection
To release me from my purgatory
Was it so wrong at such a young age
To recognise perfection in our limited days
So much time treading water
When I knew where I belonged
You saving me from drowning
Whilst being a dutiful daughter
Days became weeks
Your voice pushed to a corner of my heart
I heard whispers down the years
I pulled the wool over my ears
I could still see your face
In all the places we'd been
One day you will come back for me
You were the one who I called home
My safety net my calm in the storm
So I sit with my face in my hands
As I slowly watch the grains of sand
The tide is going out you see
Maybe one day you will come back to me.

One face
It could be your face
Or my face
Why do some have two faces?
How do we face the world
When we turn our face
To the nameless faces
Who ask us to look them in the eye
As they face us?
Can you face up to the fact
You are Turing a blind eye
When you should look them in the eye
Stand side by side
Do you mind as you walk away with your two faces
The one with a smile as you pretend you can't see
What's right in front of you
The one that moans about your lot and what you haven't got
Look around this green and pleasant land
As you lay claim to what you think is yours
Can you hold your head up high
And say you tried to make this a better place?
I can see distaste written on your face
Time to wipe the smiles from the smug faces
Wipe the tears from the misplaced
Treat each and everyone as if they are part of this human race
Next time you look at a frightened tear stained face
Have the courage to face up to the fact
That you are lucky to be in the place you call safe
That one face...
Could have been your face
But you were born in a different place
Look in the mirror as you come face to face with your future
Then look another in the eye... hold out your hand as you smile
Tell them all the pain has been worthwhile

One minute of everything
Not hours of something
One minute
Numbed by feelings of all
Not hours of nothing much
One minute
Then hours of remembering you
Not hours of nothing
Then one minute forgetting you

Oh dear!
Oh dear oh dear
What's that I hear?
One more my dear?
Yes you my dear
What me?
Are you sure
Yes my dear
One for the road
Should I be so bold
Do I need to ask?
Your task since you ask
No need to think
Have another drink
Go on do you have to be told?
Should I be so bold
To suggest one for the road
Oh all right just one mind
Then it will be time
Because it's now tomorrow
I'll follow your lead
Down the path of least resistance
At your insistence
What's the harm in one more
Are you keeping score?
There's a suspension
In my good intentions
Ah go on then
And again and again
Oh dear
Oh dear oh dear
I can't see
You see the one after that
Was my flaw
I'm on the floor
Just one more?
Next time
I shall stop when it's still yesterday
What did you say?
One more my dear
Oh dear oh dear
Oh dear....

To all of you who feel hurt and pain.
Who felt they weren't part of the game.
Who felt so ashamed.
When they were called a name.

Who felt the stab of pain.
With everything to lose and nothing to gain.
Who thought they were to blame.
And they were the ones who weren't sane.

Who feel they cause the pain.
Names branded on skin by the heat of a flame.
They wanted you to be the same.
Toe the line fit the frame.

You don't have to feel the pain.
No longer need to feel the shame.
The fact that you are not the same.
Makes you special worth more than just a name.

Thank you to all the mothers who have gone before.
Whispers from the past,
Echoes reaching into the future.
Wrap your arms around this daughter.
I am still learning not to fall.
Sit down in her shade.
Let the branches of the family tree
Protect and shelter us
Each and every day.

The ebb and flow is tied to the string on my big toe
Muscles in my calf twitch and the switch clicks
The salt spray covers my skin and so it begins
The wind caresses away the day's stresses
Ears hear the rush of whispered wishes
Eyes dance as they lull tired words into chants
Dreams subside as lost memories collide
Drench my bones with the salty tears of home
I'm coming back into view...look out to sea I can see you

When I look at the photograph of you on your wedding day,
I can see all of us stretched out into the future.
As we lay your bones to rest under the earth you enriched,
Where your feet touched,
where you played as a child,
then Walked hand in hand with your soul mate.
Could you have imagined that photograph standing guard?
Proud and watchful over all of us yet to be born.
This family tree spreading it's branches.
New life now and the past yet to come.
Rest in peace you are not forgotten
by us to be.
Remembered in the feet that walk past your image today.
Did you ever imagine who lay ahead
in the smile on your wedding day?

Whisper prayers in my ears
Be my light in the dark
Take my hand be my guide
Make my heart expand and sigh
Mask the hate filled sentences
Gather together the broken pieces.

Train pulls in as two hearts stop
Voices break as tears stream
down the tracks
Electricity crackles through the live rail
Love wants to revive the life from the dying embers
They stand there as the mist clears
Torn apart as the door slams shut.

She stands by the railings wearing that knowing look
Her dog waiting patiently by her side
Platform two
I catch a glimpse of red
Torn apart as the Windows go rattling by
Memories come back to visit me
She knew what was to become of us
Her star guides me back to the heart of our past
Clacketty clack
Drum beat, feet tap
until we meet again
on platform two

Words fell out and danced on your breath
A sigh left the pores of my skin
Ampersands flow through my veins
Anticipation hung in the air
The possibilities lay on the ground

The echoes of my voice
Leave you with a choice
Which road do you walk down ?What is your fear?
That you may drown
While the ship sinks
As the fireworks go off in your head
Was that the last time
As I left your bed
With your arms outstretched
As my words dripped like honey
And your desires I read with one look
Do we let our fingers forever reach
But never touch
Home where we both felt safe
Where adolescent dreams became a reality
As time ticked on and on
we'd become a shadow of what we were supposed to be
Your image forever in my head
In the sentences swimming before my eyes
As I walked down the platform of my former self
And shed past hurts like fishes  scales
We replaced them with wings that summer of our content
You picked up my smile
I gave you your unpredictable
We had the ability to scratch away the ambiguity
To hold out our hands to receive
Our destinies
We made each other's skin sigh
As we looked up at a cloudless sky
My future and past collided in your presence
So now as we sit shaking our heads
As your scorpion tail flicks laden with venom
My spiteful words freeze with a premonition
I'd like to suture the ruptures
Recapture the serendipity
The alchemy
That meant we had a future
Not just a history

Put your hands inside my face
Let your fingers trace
The tears the mistakes
******* smile
Let it melt into yours
The lines that creep across your cheek
That's where it starts
That's the heart of it
Feel a part of this
The flicker of recognition in your eyes
The ignition
Simplicity comes as an epiphany
Thoughts questions dissipate
As separately we come to the conclusion that the inclusion
Isn't a far fetched illusion
Or a delusionary tactic aimed to hijack the effects that affect the final outcome

I am walking down the road in the footsteps of my former self
Retracing yesterday
feeling the stabbing pains
Tears pricking my eyes
cheeks burning red
Cold sweat on hot skin
My bones worry with the weight of the world planted squarely upon my shoulders
Wearing the words of spite that sting my flesh
I cover my ears so that the silence deafens me
I have been walking away forever
feet bleeding their taunts
My hands held out palms up
Ready to receive their leftovers
There I was standing out ... and not fitting in
Did I scare all of you with my quiet acceptance ?
I was your muse
your amusement to get you out of the predicament
That meant I was the punch bag for your discontent.

I can taste the lies you left in the corner of my mouth
I cut my teeth on words that once danced on my tongue
Tastebuds tingled as the sentiment made sense
Tongues tied as eyes widened with the beliefs
I choke on the aftertaste of lips you serviced

Clothes constrain
Skin contains
The insides I wear on the outside
You don't have to scratch the surface
To find hidden meanings
To catch a glimpse of passion
To see my blood reaching boiling point
You don't have to dig your nails in
To reach through the seven layers
To hear the whispers written on my bones
Scriptures ooze from the ruptures
Lush red tastes of rusted words
Skin the binds
Skin that hides
Stretches over my memories
I wear the patchwork quilt of history
Of the mothers and fathers who have gone before
Sewn together with the glorious stories of yesterday
Stitched with the future's threads
The hopes and dreams of the generations yet to be
My heart, my soul, my skin, my home

I see
I saw
The sea
You see
The tide
It turned
The sea
It washed
Over me
You see
I saw
The ebb
The flow
The sea
It saw
It sees
The me
The you
The us
The we
It sighed
You see
It sighs
The sea
The tide
The time
The energy
It sees
The pain
It saw
The moon
It turned
It sees
You see
The sea

A silent calm had settled on her skin
She tasted the salt blown in from the sea
She heard the words whispered in the air
The breeze caressed the roses swaying to the weather's heartbeat
She walked delicately on the comfortable day
Her eyes touched the green and the blue
The time slowly ticked through her fingers
She slipped on the early evening light ...a perfect fit
She smiled a smile that said she'd always known.

One day when the moon is high,
When all the stars are aligned in the sky,
When you don't have to worry or even try,
You will have the chance to come fly.
Till then, dream of me, smile and sigh.

We are the lucky ones
We get to tell our story
With all our guts
And it's glory
When you have taken everything
And there isn't any more to give
It's time to forgive
Forget the effect
I want special effects
Not pyrotechnics
When you have taken anything
And all that's left
Is distress
Various states of undress
Haven't redressed the balance
It becomes a challenge
And you think you can't manage
To emerge from the dream
The silent screams
As you crawl along the floor once more
It's hard to ignore
When you have taken the something
The essence of me
Because you wanted to see
How far you could take
It was a mistake
To underestimate
Just how much you thought I could lose
You take what I give
Once upon a time
It was willingly free
I paid too higher price
When you want nothing more
and I'm replaced
With another face
I'm toe to toe with my reflection
Which direction
As I look over my shoulder
Am I really wiser as I get older
When my everything was nothing
More than something to discard
Is honesty so hard
The anything left to say
Will wait for another day
My depiction of the situation
Isn't a fairytale it isn't fiction
As I pick up the pieces
I know where it leads to
I'm stronger
Who knew what was to come
Time will stitch up the scars
As I look up to the stars
I thank my luck
My story
Well it's just begun
I'm not just anyone
I'm everything something
Someone.

I want to write
About
The night
You held me tight
The night
It felt so right
To write
Tonight
About
That night
Your eyes shone bright
With delight
A shining light
That night
Hold on tight
Tonight
It feels so right
Ignite
That light
About
Which I write

A silence grows from the remains of grief
Empty chairs where no one sits
The air we breathe a subtle shift
The light filled space
Leaves its shadow fingers trace
A whispered voice in stagnant air
Listen carefully you'll find her there

Wish I could float
I would hover above this broken body
A kiss would take the pain with its lips
A whisper would leave my bones in peace
A look would raise a smile on my pain etched face
I'll await a healing warm embrace

As you turn and walk away,
Know that you've left a mark...
An indelible mark,
That can never be washed away.
You've turned your back today,
You left your mark at the start.
I knew you from the start,
Knew you'd walk away today.
You had my heart but couldn't stay.
You made me see light not the dark,
Led Me from the dark.
In my heart I knew you wouldn't stay.
I'd just like to say...
You will always be a big part,
Right from the start a really big part.
But couldn't stay...there's nothing more to say.

Over the hills and faraway
Is a place you can find your home
When you come to a crossroads
There is a house in the middle
Regret and despair may have been your guides
But hope and enlightenment are waiting there
Come walk with me strengthen your body
Come eat with me feed your soul
Come breathe with me relax your mind
Don't question why you are here
Just know it's right
Feel the heat rising from within
The answers have been here all the time
I will leave my old skin on the wind
I will take comfort from this beginning
And the smile that radiates from within
Thank you from the old hole in my heart
That's now sealed with a huge big grin

Saying goodbye to the day when the sun went down
The tide took with it our dreams and wishes
Of the dying souls we'd be missing
Then returned it as a gift for the living

That kiss
Yes that kiss...
Where words danced
On reddened lips
Then skipped over tongues
That kiss
Yes that kiss...
When whispers combined  
Then slipped down and touched hearts
That kiss
Yes that kiss
That made skin stand to attention
Then sighed sentences of hope
That kiss
Yes that kiss
That made you forget
That the rest of the world exists

Door creaks
She didn't leave it ajar
Sealed...a moment in time
I can smell frailty
Suspended animation
I'm her creation
I can't save the suffering
Only the tears
Put them on the dusty shelf
I can see her echoes in myself

26 letters
My fingertips
A thought
5 vowels
My heart
A sign

The sea sighs emotion
Takes the pain away
Leaves a slice of peace
Erodes part of yesterday

I can feel your words echo with the breeze on my skin
We sat here, you and I, for the longest time
Saying goodbye to the day when the sun went down
The tide took with it the dreams and wishes of the dying souls we'd be missing
Then returned it as a gift for the living
Let the water cover my feet and the sand run through my fingers
The oyster shells a reminder of a taste of the good times
A physical symbol of the hours we'd been given