There are no distractions
        at 3:10 A M

There's not even a breeze
       no stirring of wind

I sit alone in silence
        listening to nothing

No , no I'm not in any
        kind of suffering

Just letting my consciousness
        expand beyond the borders

Beyond the mountains
        and the sea's waters

Not even the space
        surrounding the stars

There are no limits
        as to just how far

My universe
        is my man made cosmos

A thought turning to whim
        Seen through like ghost  

I sit alone in silence
        but I'm not really lonely

I have all of my friends :
        mayonnaise , mustard and lots of baloney

It's not what you say
It's how it hits me
It's not how you say it
It's how it stays with me
All in all it comes down to
Its not what you say
It's what you do

All my life I'll remember you
Until I die I'll remember you

It's not what it means
It's what it means to me
It's not how you move
It's how you move through me
All in all it comes down to
It's not how you feel
It's how I feel you

All my life I'll keep on loving you
Until I die I know it's true

When you look in my eyes, what do you see?
Do you see my pain
the fire I felt in my muscles?
Do you see the billions of tears
that had ran a marathon across my cheeks.
When looking into my eyes,
do you see my desire
for revenge
Do you see past my eyes, and into my soul,
my restless spirit?
Do you see my wounds
that still linger beneath my scars?
In my eyes, do you see my love?
Do you see my passion for loyalty?
My deep desire to be loved?
In my eyes,
do you see my confusion
my curiosity for everything
In my eyes,
can you see that I have been in pain.
The kind of pain that is worse than physical pain.
the "****" in my eyes.
The disappointment
the failure.
*my eyes hold a lot of secrets

I'm drowning in an ocean
But the water tastes so sweet.
It's not that far around me
But miles beneath my feet.

Everyone is walking on their own bridges,
But their bridges have never been wet.
Their hands are outstretched
and calling my name.
How could they all forget?

"You're the one who pushed me in!"
I yell, as water fills my throat.
As I sink I'm offered one of two things;
A set of gills or a float.

I'm used to being wet now;
Is drowning such a crime?
There's nothing for me at the surface
But resuming my job as a mime.

See, my misery is my harmony,
So if I can learn to breathe in the sea,
Refuse to think, let myself sink,
This might be able to work for me.

So stop putting all your hands out.
Please, you might fall in too.
I've learned to love the water
But the water might not love you.

I love you, Mother, Father, Lover.
I'm sorry for all that I've done.
I know that this may hurt you,
But I'd rather swim than run.

The merchant taps his toes impatiently
And tells me now to pick.
But he should know how this goes by now;
Goodbyes are never quick.

I shed a tear for my friends and family.
I think of every song that I've ever sung.
"I don't want either," I tell him.
And the water fills my lungs.

Just blank, and lines
that stretch beyond thousandths
of a decimal degree, traverses
Norway to Lithuania in a day
maybe two, with favorable winds
it's hard to be sure

6/8 masked with the bass drum
on the twos and fours, it just feels like
something extraneous and unnecessary
and other couplets of two words
that mean the same thing

Anger like snakes, like tentacles
the chaos of a cephalopod
the cunning of the reptile
cold-blooded, living in the deeps
the depths of storm clouds
and waving from an airplane

Forever goodbye, river
and all the secrets you've swept upstream
just to be churned at the confluence

I'm sorry I had let you down.
And I'm sorry I broke your heart.
I'm sorry I ended up leaving
When I said we'd never be apart.

I'm sorry I pushed you away.
And I'm sorry I let you in.
But know you were the closest to me
That a person has ever been.

I'm sorry I gave up on you
And every "I love you" I managed to say.
I'm sorry I promised to be by your side
And for the mind games we often played.

I'm sorry I'm messed up
And for every single thing I do.
I'm sorry I wasn't the one in the end.
And for not being there for you.

I'm sorry enough to say I'm sorry.
Oh, how sorry I truly must be.
To write these words over and over again
In a poem that you'll never see.

The words keep t
                               w
                              i
                               ­  s
                                  t
                           ­     i
                                   n
                                 g
                                      in my mind
               Truths and lies
       Becoming h
                             a
                            r
                             d
                          e
                              r
  ­                               and harder to find
              Blurred together
      between h
                         o
                       l
                         l
                     o
                         w
                               and grey lines
         The differences becoming
               o
                 b
               s
                  t
              a
                 c
               l
                  e
               s
                   more difficult to define
    And life has lost all its
                                           l
                                             o
                                            v
                 ­                              e
                                                  and **rhyme