And I had to walk away
I was just hoping at least he noticed I didn't run

I love you most with tension between us
You're sad, I'm mad,
Look at me.
And oh that stare
Makes my stomach churn,
With worry of what it means for us
Because maybe you'll never look at me how you used to.
I love you most when I fear I might lose you,
Gone forever,
With worry I'll never feel your hands
Make burning embers of my skin
Make me quiver
Shiver
Ashes in your arms again.
With fear your lips will never again gently,
Passionately, protectively
Meet mine.
I love you most when I get that edge
of the cliff
No breath feeling,
When it's all drooping sighs, angelic eyes
Balled up fists, wrenching heart
Aching head
Sick to my stomach,
I can't lose you, I love you, I hate you.
I love you most in the end
when we don't fight,
When, oh god, we aren't one of those couples
We become tense and worry
We lie, cry
Want to die
But never fight,
We just curl up and sigh
Breathe each other in and touch
Like we might fall apart.
But truly,
I love you most when you say
You aren't going any where,
you love me
Hold me close, won't let go
When I tell you over and over
I want you, I need you, I love you.
I love you most when we are finally together.
Alone.
And we sin,
I feel myself unravel in your bed
And breathless we cling to each other,
Come crashing back
And I bury my smile in your chest
And, at last,
I'm home.

Shooting stars and candles,
eyelashes and full moons;
it's not a bowl of lucky charms,
but wishes for us loons.

So break a wishbone if you must;
throw a penny in a well,
but know my dear that in the end,
a wish is but a shell.

You can blow the dandelion seeds,
and watch them float away,
but don't waste your time on wishes child;
go out and seize the day.

My grandma is smiling.
My uncle is recounting a story.
My sister is telling a dumb joke.

We laugh.

My aunt is bragging about her children from a previous marriage.
My uncle is making fun of his mentally ill brother.
My mother is sticking up for him.

We eat.

My aunt is asking about my future.
My cousin is talking about herself.
My uncle is complaining about his job.

We pretend to care.

My cousin is trying to hide his drunkenness.
My aunt is talking about Jesus.
My uncle is warning us of the government's plans.

We change the subject.

My sister is attempting to join the conversation.
My aunt is ignoring her.
My mother is getting angry.

We stop pretending.

My uncle is calling my mother a *****.
My aunt is reprimanding my uncle for swearing.
My mother is throwing her plate.

I watch.

My sister is crying.
My cousin is laughing.
My mother is leaving.

I help clean up.

My grandma is smiling.