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Abby Reynolds Sep 2018
how sad
how infuriating
most of all
how pathetic
it is
to know
that still, today, after everything
I'm still stuck in the mud that is your love
i'm still here, praying
in the end
it'll be me and you
it'f funny because
I convinced myself after you finally left I'd be able to move forward
but today, I lay, alone.
my bruises, faded.
my tears, dried.
& my skirt had been dusted from all the remains of you
so why in hell
do I still feel like this?
Paralyzed...
I'm bound to a person
who turns his head at my phone calls
I know I know
I should be so far gone by now.
I even know I deserve better.
but it doesn't seem to stop me
I wake each morning
I dream each night
I make the choice everyday
to sit in our spot
& wait for your return

- When are you coming home?
Abby Reynolds Sep 2018
one night you asked me if I remembered what it was like to be in love with you
I laughed to myself because
baby
how could I forget?
you standing there, hands in your pockets
the smile whenever you laid your eyes on me
the t-shirt you wore under your clothes, everyday,
because it was once your fathers
the scar behind your left ear
that appeared after fighting for your sister
How could I forget?
dancing barefoot on the cold kitchen tiles
laughing so hard we could feel it in our hearts
smoking in your car, blasting music
making future plans to run away
I knew then I had it all
I know now, forgetting will never be an option for us
How could I forget you?
I could've sworn you put the sun in the sky and the stars in my eyes
there's no forgetting a love like ours
Abby Reynolds Sep 2018
Have you ever had the feeling
your heart had just bursted one too many times
maybe this time
it truly won't recover
from the wreckage
but oh my darling it will
your heart was never intended to be collateral damage in the warpath created by those who aren't brave enough to love you
& i'm so sorry they destroyed you in their wake of self destruction
but now the choice is yours
remain down in the dirt
bruised knees and angry tears
or
you can rise up
wipe the ashes from your skirt
piece your heart back together
take back the stolen bits
then keep on walking
until you find somewhere far enough
to remake your story
you have the choice to no longer remain collateral damage
instead
become the damage yourself
Abby Reynolds Aug 2018
Maybe
I've gone truly mad
Maybe
I've lost the girl everyone so dearly loved (boo-hoo)
but is it so bad
to be the rock instead of the window?
the villian instead of the **** damsel?
is it so evil
for a woman
to be sick and tired of being the paper girl?
i'm exausted
Aren't you?
I'm tired from the boys with heavy fingers
speaking to me
whenever they want to play with fire
so what?
maybe my doll face won't be called baby anymore.
I suppose I just got bored of being toyed with
Abby Reynolds Aug 2018
I don't care if you're not sorry
I forgive you
Not for you,
for me
I release myself
from the power you once held over my head
this is me
taking back what you took from my beaten body
this is me
wiping my own tears
cleaning my own scraped knees
this is me
realizing
I am so much Stronger than you made me feel
realizing
I never needed you to fight my battles
I just needed
to let go of your hands
to put up my fists
Abby Reynolds Aug 2018
I find myself having to relearn the lesson
that you cannot love someone until they love you back
our love was like a human taming a lion
eventually I realized loving you
didn't mean you would stop biting me
it just made me a fool
for loving something
created to hurt me
truth is
the wild is in your blood and
it's not your fault
so I forgive you
for what you cannot control
but I also must release myself
from the responsibility of taming your heart


-i'm tired of bleeding out
Abby Reynolds Aug 2018
The more stories I hear of you
the less I want to remember our fairytale
With every Truth that shows
more mud gets thrown on our pages
it's time I realize
I was never apart of a storybook ending
Only a fooled princess
who mistook
the villian
for her prince

- Oh how Cliche
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