i remember the moment
where it all came into focus
after a night of drunken kisses
and lipstick stains
on your autumn sweater.
i told myself this was it
the chance to finish what we started
yet you stood infront of me
eyes casting shadows,
explaining that our stolen embrace
was an impromptu mistake
meaning that to you
we were a blinding moment
and to me, we were the sun.

i see you everywhere
i miss what we had
who we were,
so lost
yet we found eden
in each other.
your arms
became my sanctuary,
now i ache
for their familiar warmth
and your lips on mine.
yours is a void that never fills
nor do i want it to
self sabotage
in the sweetest way.
you are my church,
my holy ground.

i'd pull every single star
from the night sky
if it would only bring
me back to you.

i couldn't be human
so i made a home
in the woods
i danced with the mist
and ran with the wolves.
i lay on the pine needles
wove leaves into my hair,
perhaps if you come looking
you will find me there.

to the darkness
i surrender
my body laying in wait
hungry
claws in the earth
ruby droplets
decorating my throat
laying myself open
bathing in moonight,
from beyond the trees
my love has come
and i am ready
to be devoured.

if it takes 28 days
for skin to renew,
then i have been
13 new versions of myself
since i last felt your touch.
each day gets longer,
yet i still hear your name
in the ocean waves
and your moon soaked kisses
still keep me up at night.