The ringing, it has been bugging me. Can it please stop?
By the side drawers of the bed, you'll hear a little thump
There's an abrupt pause on my counting, I am not calm
To face the wall of truth, about these delusions in my heart

How many times did this happen again? I am older and is tired
With a mind like mine, common and proud, who would even risk a dime
That in every few people I talk, nobody would listen on how
How the silent pain surrrounds, how it almost makes me laugh
On how I curl into a fetal position, the world, a year apart

It is stupidly pathetic, but I am now a child of lies
A child that has stories, but in deaf ears it dies
For the many times of broken hopes, for a little, I still asked
That maybe I was worth it, maybe. Now it's gone.

I have an urban story as a child I'd listen to
About a kid with high hopes and dreams, more that her laugh
She'd sat down below that tree trunk cause she know not to climb
Then sing about the birds and the flowers in the sky

How sweet of a smile she has, it made a jolly clap
To those that have known her, since she knows who she's not
The kid would play pirates, sail in her ship of grass
Then the other kids would come running, wanting to play tag

She'd sat just there in her ship
with her hymns and that hazel eyes
That even though she don't see as crystals
she knew what beauties are

Piece by piece, onto the ground they fell
Strip them from me, away from my skin
Remove them from my space, the dirt, the shame, the greed
Further away from me, to a land I do not care
Not to know, not to bare
Do not regret that your truth is held
People will use you, people will leave
People will ignore you, you don't exist
Strip them, naked in the lake
Green water of mischief, of unworthiness
You will drown and they are not there
Remove that suit from your body
That made you think they cared
They don't. Deception. No, they don't.

the grip tightened
veins popped

blood drops
numb

I am a pebble, stare at me, then judge me
Mock my brittle edges with your sharp gaze
And tell me how I look unattractive
That I look foolish and insane

Dried leaves carried me
Away from other gravels, whom
I wished to recognize these, I--
Should be belonging in their reign

Disregard my trembling fingers
For my derisible names
Because the norms would often tell me
I am probably not missed

Still, I see myself in that table
Beside pretty ornaments
When my money can only afford
A linen coaster of paper planes

At night I pray to God
That maybe they are right
But I will still be faithful, someday,
My longing will come to life

It was not real, an illusion

Hiding from beneath
The threshold of those
Lies that you told
To make me believe
The person whom I'm talking
Is a hero of the olds

Your kindness was bitter
Spiteful, but bold
It lacked so much leeway
For comfort and soul
Believed in being the freedom
When it was tethers of cold

As time passed by
It ran out of fillers
To conceal it's grimes
From words that I uttered
Consoling such ruse
I stepped on it, yearning

With my truth and yet you

Your deception was forgiven
Only in your mind
All this time I have driven
The wheels you brought out
Unknowing, insane is brethren
With your impurities of time

The people told me,

The rose is lovely
Forget the thorns

And expect the uncanny
Of love and lust

And your heart would venture
In the land of poems

But the ending is never
What's in your thoughts

a long tunnel
I scream

deficits on me

How can he expect that the world will treat him well
when he did all the doings that the wise man regret
for such a person he is, unloving, uncared
how can he wish that there be a different dawn to set

as he stands at the cliffs end, thinking for a wish
for the changes he can give, the one's he mistreated
as he stood in brave stance to take the leap ahead
nothing then mattered, nothing then made sense

As a friend I tried to stop him, to take a chance and live
but he smiled so genuine and a salute he then waved
as a friend, I stood there as I saw him spread his wings
now he is in heaven, the one I failed to save.

Don't be scared

to learn that all the pain
will be part of what you'd gain

and the smile that you now had
be torn apart in tears

for sometimes, in your life
you will beg people to stay

but for sometimes in their lives
they would choose the better lane

and not everyone accepts you
no matter the promises

that most people will leave you
for all their betterment

When I see the blue it taunts me
and I tell myself it fixed me
I would remember the days coming
when the icon popped and irked me

So I heard a sound, then memories
came flooding, so willing
My heart swelled with longing
for a platform in homecoming

I was accepted and brandished
the tattoo on my arm stung
with words "take me to neverland"
Sometimes I wish they'll let me
and take me back as Tint

The everlasting feeling
of somewhere I have been
Is everyone there holding on
and the lives we lived goes on

With the willingness to say hello
Unmute my mic and greet you all
I came back as Tint,
Hello,
Good morning.

Silhouette, silhouette
cast me out,
put me in your paper bag
then burn it down
let the rain degrade me
to this gob of grime
tear my limbs in wedges
then stitch it up

Silhouette, shadow dear
render me now
to the lowest being branded
by thee, mighty God
then let them stare at me
with awe and love

I will peek at their ethos
just to see desire
for the things they cannot,
and will never have
I guess the world soon be ending
with dreams that hang
within that wishing well,
that drained, once doused

Too much, too much in me is hate
Slashed myself in pieces
watch blood run through my veins

Anger is my blanket
A clothing I cannot un-take
Remove me and my memories
I swiveled in so much hate

I want to breathe a nice air
even if it's regret

Hate, hate is within my skin
not ashamed to **** a being
not scared to be chased by names

I am me
A broken melody
Hate, all is hate
I will never,
Never love again

I am the twig, you are the house
I am the body of the boy,
you are the angel that sang
Never meant to be one still,
I hoped that our stars align

Broken friendly vows
and here I am in cries
of how I cannot make it stop,
how it insentifies
I knew what was not meant to be
still, I have lost the fight

For I was embraced with
warmth and laughter
and now I won't wish for it to stop
I will never mean to hurt you
and I am not supposed to love
What will me, the caretaker
What is supposed of me now?

From a distance I will stare at you
like a fallen shooting star
I have lost the chance to be a defender
to show how I cared, a lot
That you were meant to be with me
and that yes, I liked you back.

Have you ever lost someone whom you cared for?

The third string of the guitar
hummed the last of sounds
Into a fading tune of memory
that I tightly held upon
Bruised and tattered hands
as I hoped to make it last

But I would be the happiest
to see you in your charm

In the silence of the piano keys,
I saw you pass me by
For you have shown me the laughter
that is far long gone
I will miss you in my loneliness,
but you won't make me sad

For I will be the happiest
to see you in your charm.

On this valentines day
in my head plays a replay
Of a world of fantasies
where I loved a girl named Bray
For the redness of the shirt
and the purple in the sky
I made a dancing sing-song
for the lost and bygone child

I do not seek the romance
and I do not seek the warmth
But I do know that in some ways
I have wanted to be charmed
Just be friends, just be strangers
nothing special, no retention
After all, this is just me
a poem writer who's unfree

Partial, in a staring contest
I see the small side, this little plastic plant
yet the leaves are colored white
How it sees beyond
I fathom, but can't
cause I know where the leaving
and I know where the none
in my front is a doppelganger
and she too, can see past
by my back is nameless man
who think he is divine

Now the world is draining colour
and I will hear the miming sound
like a fallen light in star dusts
a meteor that don't shine
shaded in lengthy numbness
it buried to the ground

I'm tired of falling in love
This tingly feelings of
Butterflies in my mind
As the air I breathe hitches
When I see your pretty smile
To hear your lovely laugh
Your hand to hold in mine
This warmth to fill my heart

I'm tired of falling in love
Apologising all the time
Because I cannot make it all right
Thinking of the someday
When I will break my stupid heart
Exhausted of wanting more
To show you I work hard
To keep our love alive

I don't want it all, help me up
To stand from this ground
That gripped my feet to stuck
Telling me I'm grounded
But I should not move apart
From the mistakes and the failures
And wrong things in my past
That will lead me to a future
Full of bleeding and of scars

I'm tired of falling in love.

this mind

metal sponges
bursts

then dust

to the friend, the stargazer
do you still write poetry?
do you still scribble your haikus
with bravery and flare?

I have come back to the homeland
but I did not see you there
when you used to be the constant
that would pop up in my head

I guess we all decided to travel
beyond the calming plains
out there in the open
throwing writing to the wind

I have lost my little sparkle
matches are all that's left
I might've dropped the candle
that my poetry has built

If you see this, dear friend
I hope you write again
I would love to see your haikus
in this lovely little page

by EDGAR ALLAN POE

It was many and many a year ago,
   In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
   By the name of Annabel Lee;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
   Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
   In this kingdom by the sea,
But we loved with a love that was more than love—
   I and my Annabel Lee—
With a love that the wingèd seraphs of Heaven
   Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
   In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
   My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsmen came
   And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
   In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in Heaven,
   Went envying her and me—
Yes!—that was the reason (as all men know,
   In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
   Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
   Of those who were older than we—
   Of many far wiser than we—
And neither the angels in Heaven above
   Nor the demons down under the sea
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
   Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;

For the moon never beams, without bringing me dreams
   Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise, but I feel the bright eyes
   Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
   Of my darling—my darling—my life and my bride,
   In her sepulchre there by the sea—
   In her tomb by the sounding sea.

I let the sparkle float the air
surrounded yellow, oh so, frail
for it, I could reminisce
for she is, my Everest

I have forgotten how to write,
nothing came to empty mind
darkness always made me rhyme
grief, the anger, and, of spite

but, she, my ever-rest
took me off the scary edge
led me to secure-ity
against all my diverse-ity

Wordplays are beyond me
[create-TV-tea]
but I had it, and it is
so I go back without the rest
and pause,
period,
leave.

Do you need my comfort, would you like some
the talks I give won't mock you
and I assure my warmth won't harm
I cannot bare to just stare at
when I see the rougness in your eyes
that when you stare through the mirror
the other part is saying goodbye

I can stay here with you in this moment
you can cry right in my arms
or you can stay in your space, me in mine
but let's sit here, hand in hand
I'd listen to your stories and the tales
and my support will be here to prevail

I can help you with comfort, just let me be
for your smile is the one thing I liked to see
here in this sanctuary, there's you and me
and though tomorrow you're leaving
I'll still stay in place, thinking
someday you'll come back and find me here
again.

In my dreams, I saw you
I want to hold your hand
and the tears, you got through
is flaming in my heart
and it's a wish,
can't come true
I want to be a better man
to be the one, all for you
tho your world is on collapse

Let me be a part of you,
I miss you.
I see you when I close my eyes
I would live for,
the day that's yet to come
by then I'll hold you,
warmth into my arms
and I would tell you
I've become a better man.