soak up that summer sun
drenched by the H2O
soak up the winter breeze
drenched by the slush from trees
soak up the fall colour
changed by the inspiring scholar
soak up that summer sun
spring into action and all.

May I …
May I take you out over a candle lit evening
Where the look in your eyes burn hotter than the flame its self
May I kiss you over so gently and tell you there is no worry in the world our willingness cannot over come
When the sun may set and our eyes reset
You will be my last 64 bit pixelation stored in my memory net
For May I love you all year round
My arms around you I have wound
For take a cigarette and weld it in my arm
Let the heat ignite my firearm
For May I love you all year round
Memories with you burned in can never be drowned

i'll never lie to you

i see your swift current grasping waterfalls

flow

you make me melt

you are the bean bag chair to my acid trip

i want to feel deserving,

lack of purity on my mind

was it that difficult, a burden, to simply visit me for once?

i'd travel mountains but you can't travel on a simple streetcar

ya ....

the only ricochets of this waterfall are not your eye based ones to mine

but me leaping headfirst down your current led waterfall

hit the bottom

splat

i ricochet

today the weather is temperate and modest
sculpted as a model depiction of the artistic connoisseur's painting
i've been observing the seasons change on me
day be the day the park bench withstands yearly attractions, never yet less deranging

so as i lay back with crow bar on the corner of the plank
i wonder, don't think, i'm already of admirable rank
i dig my piercing meteor to the center of the bench
chip, a wedge flew off, resembles a baseball bat when clenched

happiness loves Missouri and i need to take a dip in that river
swim the distance into the current, direction; a lively propagator
currently chilling out on this draft,
catch your lustrous beauty later...we all know this craft

summertime quarantine
an infectious summer
vaccinated by its rays of semi-life evoking sunlight
lathered in a thin sheet of SPF
Stating
Perspicacious
Features
those eyes glazed,
window sill eye lashes
her window i saw ever so gracefully
but a window only shows the frontal view .
i want to observe every latitudinal angle
and beyond the periphery of my peripherals.

i'm always in social isolation when my eyes are locked in with yours.

*******.

for some reason more than a little reason
today i feel at peace
for some emotion more than a devouring emotion
today i feel serene
for some feeling more than you i'm feeling
today i feel whole
for some devotion more than my self devoted
today i feel with you

not much to write
so i sit here and type
the different attributes which surround my day
cultivated like a pottery wheel bearing clay
my hands are molding that which has limitless possibilities
to my perception of this perfect vase
bantering and yelling leading to shattering
redecoration of modern home decor
a righteous cause

cimb up the tree
willow it's way into the bark
infect all the apples
make its self at home
reclaim all the apples
the consumer is not alone

here's a picture
look in to the infrastructure of the fine frame
the outer border allures inward
vertices crosshair a centroid
the fine pigmentation due to stencil work and rich bold dabbing of acrylic paints merge to formulate images
blending, mashing, complementation of colours
azure, zyon, topaz, vermillion
i see a puddle and my interpretation is my reflection
i see a disemboweled figure who's ****** features exclaim "out of proportion"
bold petal ears, swelling rose cheeks, wrinkled eyes and a protruding thorn of a nose
i see beauty as the people in the painting smile back and joyfully prance
we laugh together as we see the same thing...people stuck in a frame watching the work of others pass them by as they remain idle for their idols

words which squeezed out veining the neck of the bottle

the bottle storing all my honest, sincere, compassionate words that no one wants to hear

the epitome of abuse just seems so used up

i've been shaking this bottle filled of chamPAIN for months now

slowly a mushroom cloud forecast has been developing

incinerated indium

violent violet

the cork popped

accompanied by the entirety of the split second mosaic bottle

and as usual honesty fed the beast

to live miserably ever after :( :)

i love the Frost fingerprinting my bedroom window
laminating a translucent sheet
Jack seen only by his palm prints
the widow's window of opportunity
covered with frost
turbidity caused from a loosely stranded past
she never sheds her winter coat
frost is always clinging on her summertime pane
in winter she wears extra layers

happy almost birthday
happy almost smiles
happy almost good times
you'll read this eventually
happy almost friendship
happy almost....
but almost isn't enough
almost doesn't finish the race
almost is a lack of fulfillment
almost doesn't cut it
you deserve a complete life
happy birthday
happy smiles
happy good times
whether i bring or take away the almost is up to you

a tree planted deep in its roots
could not blossom or spur
but flourish
for the caretaker always watered and the sun
the sun always shined
look up and check, if you become blind
you know it's true
but who watched the care taker
....
just the stalker across the street
peering through the windows with binoculars
jotting down the actions and deeds committed
she just put her attention upon trying to formulate
what it meant to be a good person
what it meant to care
what it meant to be a caretaker

for when the caretaker was no longer able to nurture
the naturalist could fill the caretaker's shoes

poetry is so ******* gay
write about stupid **** no one cares about
i must be a ****** because i always write passages
**** those butterflies
cut off its wings
earings
earwings
emotions just a waste of chemical signals
neutralize my brain chemistry for joy atm

she's killing me....but she's not even in arms reach

light dispersion
through a carved glass prism
array of colours emerging a from a single beam
diffraction
a fraction of me dies
a faction of me dyes
that's why my hair now has highlights

ceremony spiraled down into a coniferous cone like - gesture

raise your glass make a toast

deliver the speech our ears have been yearning to gracefully hear

your words, oh your soothing, pain dissolving words

they solved every problem we ever encountered in a lifetime...

for the moment being

----

the moment fades just like our memory of your  soul lifting elocution (speech)

but we do remember the smiles gathered and shared

for we all know --what's her name again...i only remember her face

said every person ever to hazily recall another

when bruises turn to cuts
and cuts turn to wounds
and wounds turn into lovers leaving too soon

when ill doings turn to trouble
and trouble turns to joy
the cringing smile on an officer who's punishment deploys

when you i see a star
and in your eyes i see the moon
but i look down at my chest to see a knifing harpoon

and when lovers turn to dust and
dust sprays along the moon
it will always be your station
to that frequency i will tune

that day you really hurt me....i can't forget
do i even want to write this ...i guess
no i don't.. it's not worth mentioning
i know you'll see this
i know i didn't need to point it out
but somethings are better out than in
and unfortunately stamped into our memory as a postcard that reminds us of the vacation we were never apart of
why...couldn't i have picked you up that day
i guess i trusted you, but i've learned never trust a carefree soul
because they won't care when you care the most
they won't bother to make amends on a bridge they wouldn't mind cutting the suspensions on, because the way down would be fun.
that bridge was the reason for my waking and motives every morning
anyways
this doesn't need to continue
it was my birthday that day and you were the present that i never had a chance to open
you were my wish when i blew out my candles
you weren't there
hope you had a swell time with your 'friend' you got acquainted with
alcohol ******* *****
alcohol is killing you
that day it killed apart of me
lol i sound like a Boring Insecure Taunting Conversation Hound
but really... i should have picked you up that day

love carved and grazed
needled and etched
plastered and secured
through a fine cross section of a wormhole altered looking glass
beads pour down this sculpture as water droplets do on 10 minutes past showered jasmine petals
nourishing
time stretched
wave warped
a benevolent hosting guardian
as water drips i have showered the land through these hosting lenses
and your mineral shaped circulating spectacle
a heart stone awaiting nourishment down to its
water grasping core

you are my songbird and i always
rejoice to your hymn
but recently your songs make me drift apart from
reality
an altered spirituality
a renounced melancholic grin

Plain and simple

I wish she was plain and simple , the opposite of what many seek in life
I would like to see her run through planes and her dimples when she smiles
Recently I do not see her smile
Recently I do not see her dimples
Recently I do not see her

As people, only we can help ourselves, and I must help myself move on before I move in
I must help myself glorify life and celebrate it before I am consumed by a memory of what was
Before I am engulfed by the fire which I ignited
Before I am devoured by the tigers which I had raised

In time She will help herself as well, all I can do is wait. Time will lift this weight.

i can't stop writing about you
i value what we had and i think your friendship was more than i could ask for
i just was selfish and wanted a relationship, which wasn't detected by this light house
your ship was translucent in this fog medium
i fogged up
i want to make memories not struggle to remember them

maybe we can share,
this troublesome feature known as a dare
i dare us to pull out all our hair
give it to cancer victims who's medical side effects scared

the petrified and kept them shook
right now i feel as still as an inukshuk
hard rock and chiseled features
for sure that cheerleader would admire me from the bleachers

so bleach my hair and then let nature pigment my skin
for brighter shades may cause me to shed this exoskeleton of a tin

I love you and I hate you to oblivion
You're so beautiful but sometimes I want to see you cry and hurt
I don't ever want to see you cry
You the woman who never comes
Psychotic ***** we may both say, but i never want to put you down
I want to sniff every inch of you
Kiss every body part
Nourish every emotion
You have me in your malicious game of dice but I seem to keep rolling snake eyes
I'll eye you like a snake and constrict you with my scaly coil right before I unleash my venom to your slow painful death
And in those moments I will wish I never did that ....
But I will also look at you with fierce eyes and let you know, now you know how I feel
Hurt , abandoned , decieved
All because I loved her and she didn't love me
My life is dull these days
Some may say it's just a bit Jaded

what is it like when a bird has wings
feathers kerneling off its delicate twig wings
what is it like when a bird can't fly
when it's silk feathers cannot grasp the air
and elevate

what a sight to see as a bird takes off
making the sky its new nest
twigs branches and pine needles
so delicately poking the air and the air pokes back
the wind beneath it's wings
now that is a friend always welcomed under my arm

today is a day;
not meant for sweeping or mopping
but for keeping and stocking
unless your sweeping my pulled out hair and my tears off
that
hard oak laminate platform upon which i stand
keep my tears stored away on your prized display
collection
of
moments where his heart was shattered like the glass eye of the kid's face i punched
brass knuckles ...but i got glass in my knuckles now
no one deserves this
i should have never laid a finger on you
for you lay me down to rest and i love to rest on you :)

To the girl who was beautiful and borrowed my soul
I think about you every day
You are an illusion to me, a mirage in the distance
I wish to be a father, have a son, but you are the holy spirit
A serious glare, followed by a subtle stare, moving my lips if i only dared
You awaken kingdoms and bring forth wars
Troy would take 15 arrows to the ankle for you
Eyes as captivating as a black hole luring light
You are the light in my day, you make me smile
But as I no longer see you, my torch's embers dim to ashes

if i put a gun to my temple
and shattered my skull
pulverizerd my temporal lobe
it's only temporary and knowledge may fall

maybe there's a way
to let go my feelings
because i'm tired of feeling
these feeling i'm feeling

writing may help
i type to my self
because usually no one responds when
you talk
i just want someone around...

i'm mount st helen and i'm about erupt and spew this magma all over your  sacred, unchallenged city
yosemite national park am i and this geyser is about unleash steam deep into your ****** pores
you'll get a steam cleaning better than most nurturing spa's give in their treatment
you're that piece of slightly scuffled down fabric and i'm a needle dying to put my thread through your ever so narrow orifices
i'm the whale and i've been submerged in water long enough to have my blow hole spray like an 18th century stone sculpted fountain
i'm a landmine waiting to be triggered and you just miraculously stepped on my area of the turf
i'm the colours of holi and you just walked through an empty corridor paralleled with balconies of festive celebrators in your brand spanking new WHITE nikes and plain white 'mother says don't get your new shirt ***** or you'll be handwashing this with a gallon of detergent' t-shirt
i'm aaa--aaAAA--- AUHHHHHHHHHHH

i'm at peace once again,,, but i'm - a - building it up just again

**** THIS ISOLATIon

when your smile fades my
heart drops just as your cheek bones do
and everyone's enthusiasm does
when your eyes sadden
my euphoria hides just as your
eagerness to welcome me does
just as an afraid bear cub does to a wrath swallowing winter  
when your smile fades
i cry in the corner and whip my self as if indiana jones did
shatter my crystal skull
granulize the pieces like the extinguishment of a burnt cigarette
my scars never fade
when your tears run
i run towards you to comfort you as beanbag chairs do
to channel flipping tv junkies
when your smile fades i will always love you
when your smile fades a part of me vaporizes
when your smile fades a part of mine grows
when your smile fades
i hope you know what it's like to be tortured
hurt and whipped
my scars upon my face just as the joker entertains
ensures my
smile never
fades
my darling *****

when someone else bites why do i bleed?

how much blood can seep through me

when she takes her jaw and rips out my artery

isn't that enough or do i need to give you

your own blood as well?

i sit in my demise
dim eyes
shadows lurking
delusions swirling in this typhoon
pull me under but i can't go lower
the bottom is just the beginning
i'm already dead inside

chinchilla eyes which gleam like luxurious sand vulcanized marble
pouty lips
dripping with gravy
on your poutine lips

lick tongue sealed the chronic condition of this flimsy envelope
glue made mobile
tongue devours all that made the flavour of that sweet additive of
ever so luring adhesive
taste me
taste me
seal me like your lips after i brush my fingers down your sifting hair to your hypnotic hips
ASSSSSSSSSSS
UHHHHHHH
conceal me and i'll seal you with every taste
glue me down with your formulating lip gloss
a message you'll carry around with you that was never spoken loud
this envelope is sealed and is waiting to be dropped at its destination
P.O. box
123 love me like i could have loved you

you are the LEDs on my christmas tree
the candles on my menorah
during diwali the flame on my divaa
the flashlight for the lone camper's midnight stroll
the headbeam for the train pursuing it's iron railed tunnel

you are the sun for the albino person
you are the laser to an innocently peaking child
the 1,000,000 lumens to dracula
the grenade to the amputated war veteran

you are the reason for my pupils to dilate

you make me wish my iris never stopped constricting

radiate that direct sunlight
make my pupils dilate until my whole iris is consumed
spf 50 is no match for this sun
i need spf 2 ***** fudging hundred
tan me like a hash brown
fry me like pancake batter
let me soak up that skin cancer and i'll enjoy the days
where i laugh and play and maybe that's why i was too blind to see you were right there
i was consumed by the light in front of me when you were my shade

i'd cry for help but these days i can't cry
i'd ask for your assistance but it seems like i'm losing my voice
i'd go to the clinic but it seems that all the appointments are booked
i'd take pills.......NOOOOO i don't medicate
i'd move out of harms way but i'm too petrified to do so
i just realized my actions are harms way.
i'm not going to run away from my self

i love you
no you don't
i love you
stop lying
i love you
you're making me uncomfortable
i love you
leave me alone
i love you
maybe you do..
i love you
i love you

if i could take a shotgun blow to the head
maybe it would be a nice way to unwind

nukes are going off inside my cranium
and shrapnel pinching its way through me ear BANGING drums

if i could pull a kurt cobaine
i may just be a trigger happy lad tonight

to the night
for this is my last night
tonight if all is
unfortunately done
right
this is my last write.

--- FICTION ----

scar my heart so i will know every wound
that i could never mend

scar my soul so i could recall life's every downfall and crevice

scar my face and you ****** up

to you it may concern
when you were my lantern
my showlight
my beacon
my love

now you are a burned out filament
a shadow
tungsten opened due to excessive enthalpy
in this reaction

a surge in electrons with nowhere to arc

you were and still are my dearest friend

but like a deer caught in the headlights
maybe it's better i reverse this car a few times
and let the track marks really sink in

tarnish this engine
i will always love you
to the heavens and beyond

dearest

clay sculpted hand weld
new shapes formed tales telled
of historic artifacts that left me with subjective water bath
that new clay woven nose smelled

put my head on the pillow let me defrost my day's load into the form of dreams
i can perish to lengths unknown
where 30 cm rulers go up to 30 miles
let me slumber through melatonin infused days
where a mental collapse is inevitable
eyes shut
breath *******
mind eased
imagination wild
a stretch where oceans are just lakes in this unknown galapagos
birds glaze the tropical air with journeys declared by delayed shutter speed
they are an endless array of shooting stars

--

i still remember my last dream of you
a scarf and an unknown conclusion
i thought you jumped but we all know angels fly

sometimes i just want the **** kicked out of me
i want my arm twisted and pushed as i yell PLEASE STOOPP
i want to hear the crackling of my bones are slowly converted to a sudden percussive snap
i want to hear the tearing of my muscle fibers and see it like ripping apart fine strings of yarn
i want you to kick me until internal bleeding seems like an everyday thing....kinda like saying hi to your neighbor
i want my organs rearranged, my liver can be in the region of my brain and my brain can be used to play keep ups with my foot (like soccer)
i want you to take my face and pulverize it against concrete/brick until its fine bone and then it's just the friction between hard calcium and limestone
and when i plead for MERCYYY PLEEASE i want you to call an accomplice and use their hands to torment me as well
light me with kerosene and matches and watch me burn and my skin blister.....and then i want you to put me out just to give me hope....and then reignite the initial flame
i want you kick me in the ***** so hard they invert into ovaries.
i just want to find peace.
but i don't want you to **** me....i just want to be taught a lesson for my outrageous, provocative actions.
maybe then i will be humble
maybe then i will be pure.

if i die at least all my impurities will die with me or will they live on in the actions of others.
can we ever be pure?

you have harpooned me
launched your sphere deep beyond the surface of my flesh
you created your own tunnel in a cave unexplored
i have become lacerated
the harpoon pulls my skin upon removal like a cobweb slowly being peeled off of a neglected wall
red dye drips at my feet, dye rich with iron, dye displaying a pigment of vermillion
i think 'I needed my shoes coloured anyways..' as my vision fades in and out
images become blurry, losing their fine, defined borders
becoming obscure visions
resembling underdeveloped photos in the dark room
to let go and let my soul linger freely,
perhaps this was the cure all along

OR

perhaps i should yank that harpoon free
fling it back to the source which it came
with my own two hands and two eyes
aim
wind back
release
one measly cut will not define who i am
I am victorious and my soul is with me
here.
to stay.

blood trickles down my forearm as fresh rivers of water rush through cracks formed by earth's shifted tectonic plates

i scream for your name, i scream in vein

eye's strained veins obsessive as a jellyfish tentacles grasping my iris tied down as captured safari animals net retained dragged away form their children

i search for your image, eyes search for your image

as a ghost french exhales souls of names once spoken and wafts the syllables which define your name

i grasp your conscious self in my arms, i lose your conscious self through wielding armed arms

the days I long to hold you my dear
to hold you
in my arms only nurtured
by your

ruby red
r                    .
a                 .
   i               .
     n       C>
drops

now i can write when no emotion holds me hostage
when straying eyes were meant to know and observe
when poetry was meant to be judged and reflected

now i can write

i prefer to wear a cloak and compose rather than
have a spotlight shined upon to eminate my bubbbly perfections waiting to pop any second and soap all over the crowd
cleaning up their act

now i can be free

go ahead this platform was not meant for your approval
it was meant for my sanity and expression
a firework ready to burst strontium and copper compounds igniting the sky
you red this and it blue you away
i am gun powder ready to ignite
aluminum dust and graphite
let your eyes be the concepts which admire the show with awe regardles of the colours you admire
a specatacle of all sky lit maps
railway maps burst into the night time
let your eyes view

but your eyes will never
never
never be
the dampening act upon which my fuse is dimmed and struggling to ignite