And I'm sorry about ever knocking on his door.
You deserve better,
Better than me.
And I'm aching for you.
You deserve better,
Better than this.
And I'm trying not to cry in your arms.
You deserve better,
Better than us.

This **** got me feeling some type of way...
And I felt compelled to say..
Swallow my thoughts..
******* words..
And if it's too nasty spit it back at me..
I want you to feel just how I feel..
I want you to know...
That if you let me...
You sure as hell wont regret me...
****, if you let me...
You'll never forget me...
Please don't act like you know me..
All you know is word of mouth...
That doesn't mean you know me...
All that means...
Is you know someones ****** up portrayal of me...


I feel like I'm on stage...
Performing in front of a bunch of clowns...
Talking a bunch of ****..
Cuz you've got me all wrong...
I'm aint no clown...
I know my name's getting tossed around...
My personal business is just in everyone's ears...

And At this point...
I'm just above all this ****..
My head is in the clouds...
I've been through it all...
31 years young and I've been through it all...
The fails, the falls...
Are you surprised??
I'm like Niagara...
look closely...
I got right back up like ******...
I'm still standing...

So, Stop trying to shoot me down..

How could you ever really know my story?
You've never been in my shoes...
Don't you know no one alive can always be an angel?
When everything goes wrong....
You see some bad...
I'm honestly just a soul whose intentions are good...

So go ahead...
Love me or hate me...
I swear it won't make or break me...
You have no idea where my head was in that battle...
I was just trying to stay ahead of my shadow...

Truth is...
I lost everything, but I ain't the only one...
Don't care what you try and say...
That's life...
That's just how the **** it goes...
I knocked, and hope wasen't there...
Love was gone but maybe it was never there...

So, who the hell are you to judge?
Didn't you know...
First came the hurricane, then the morning sun?

But its cool now, its fine...
I'm no longer angry...
I'm no longer floating like a boat without a paddle...
I'm just cool like LA nights...
Speaking nothing but truth to you,
high as a kite...

It's like I am a trash can,

That everyone dumps all of their emotional garbage into.

But I never get emptied.

I love you.

I don’t know who you are,
but I know you’re reading this.
I know it hurts and I know that it feels endless.
I know “hurts” is the wrong word, because you’re dying.
You feel like you already died.
Because you can’t accept that you’re living,
Because living is hell.

I won’t tell you it’ll get better.
I won’t tell you you’ll be alright.
Because you may never be better,
You may never be alright.

What I will say,

Is that I know what you’re going through
And that I love you for it.

Is that you are infinitely beautiful,
No matter what others say or how they look at you.

Is that your value is greater than the entire universe.

Is that you are the strongest person I know,
Because no one has ever fought as hard as you have.

Is that I would die for your happiness,
Because it kills me to see you suffer.

Don’t give up,
Even if you already have.
Because You are the reason that I’m alive.

Love,
A Survivor like you.