Dear all-seeing creator
Or figment of our imagination
You are my least favorite ex
But I did really love you, for a time

See, you taught me how to love others
But you also told me loving myself was selfish
You told me I needed to give everything to you
And that having anything of my own was sinful

You told me that all people sin
But you also taught me about forgiveness
You told me that no matter what you’d love me
But also said I didn’t really deserve your love

You gave me mixed signals
Told me I should love everyone
But then that loving a woman was wrong
That loving anything more than you was wrong

You told me I was made in your glory
But that I would forever be shrouded in sin
That evil of my own making would come
And I’d have to remain true to you

So I’m conflicted I guess, or just confused
I don’t know if I believe or don’t
I don’t know if I should hate you or love you
But I do know I don’t need you

So that is why I called you my ex
Because I did love you, and I don’t hate you
Because you were important in my life
But now I’ve found better people and things

Things and people that make me happy
And don’t sometimes make me hate myself
These people let me know I’m worthy
And that’s something you never told me

you are soft all over, yet i still feel your comforting weight when you lay with me
you are swift and sleek, but also adorable in your own small ways
the way you lay on my chest as if i’ve no need to breathe is insanely frightening
and the way you make sure to position yourself just right, where my arm will fall asleep
but i won’t be able to move
is absolutely ingenious
you have the most enchanting pale green eyes
they beg for cuddles while simultaneously asking if i’m alright,
and it’s admirable how you are loyal to me
when some days i can hardly bring myself to feed you or change the litter
you have more faith in me than i do
because when i am sad or crying
you push your head against my nose
make sure your **** goes in my face,
curl up on my chest and sleep with me
or you meow until i’m forced to get up
and you trust that eventually i’ll get up

It’s almost 5 am
And I’m trying to remember
That I’m not the only lonely person
Because right now everyone is alone

So I’m laying on my couch
Typing out this poem
Trying to remind you that you’re not truly alone
Letting you know I’m always here