Repeat this song in my head
Just before I go to bed
This is why I haven't bled
This is why I am not dead
Just these simple words been said
Take away my need for meds
Repeat this song in my head
Just before I go to bed.

My mind is going crazy
Today it's sure not lazy
I try to block this noise
By strumming instruments and toys
But the more that I create
All the more of me I hate
I could point out countless flaws
But you just would not understand the cause
My mind is starting to scare me
All these visions that you can't see
My sickly sweet faked smile
Would fool anyone for miles
Today is just another day I'd like to be someone else
Today is just another day my breaking heart swells

Tears prickle at my eyes
And if not for my own words of comfort
I would not have made it through your lies

stop
stop
stop
come hold me now
it's getting worse
stop, please, stop
come hold me now
or drive my hearse
stop
stop
stop
i'm dying out
this life's my curse

But will I ever be happy?

I hate these words repeating in my head
I hate these rhymes my brain has been fed
I hate this feeling of not feeling my feelings
I hate this part when it's too late to hang from the ceiling
I hate the guilt that I guiltily push down
I hate it when all I can think of is the same old noun
I hate my hate towards hateful beings
I hate the ****** melody my mouth sings
I hate that I have no say at this point
I hate my heart breaking, worse than breaking of joints
I hate this room and this house and this neighborhood
I hate these things that everyone should
Love and adore but somehow I can't
I hate when I become to the shrinking size of an ant
I hate this verse that I'm making
When I stand up in class and recieve laughs at my voice shaking
I hate my complaints and I hate my emotionless emotions emotionally seeping out of my motionless skin
I hate this I hate that I hate you
I hate that I'm lying right now just to pull me through

I don't like who I am
I smile at dents in my skin
I search and I long for a sin
I don't like who I am
I turn all the boys into bloodbaths
Then I cry at the touch of their sharp wrath
I don't like who I am
I walk around reckless and staid
I would **** for my soul to just fade
I don't like who I am
I torture myself unconsensually
No wonder my mother disowns me
I don't like who I am
I hurt too much for too many reasons
I am punished as if committed treason
I don't like who I am
And I know you don't either
I don't like who I am
I can't stand my mind's seether
I don't like who I am.