as i dangled
as i danced
i no longer could use my voice
nor my own breathe
i was your puppet
on a string
and you controlled every
part of me

my body went into shock
it was like watching a terrible
accident happen right before my eyes
my adrenaline is pumping
my heart is racing
i feel like i've lost all control
sick to my stomach
something i can't quite comprehend
or make sense of

-watching you love someone else

you got stuck
in that same
place you begged me
to help you out of
sinking
like quick sand
now all i can do is
sit back
and watch you drown
in your past

you crept in my window
in the middle of the night
to steal all i had
right from me
nothing left in sight
place your hands around my
mouth
and now i can't breathe
the loneliness has robbed me
of everything

i'm afraid to see the dentist
it isn't the drill
or the long needle
that presses into your gums
that terrifies me
its the numb
for so long i couldn't feel a thing
but it finally wore off one day
and i don't want to know
that that feels like anymore

you knew i could take care of them
i could nurture them
you orphaned your demons
at the doorstep of my soul
now they’ve started their chaos inside of me

- i can’t adopt them

i wish i could make you disappear from my mind
- i'm no magician