Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
It’s been the first time in a long time
The pain
The aches have subsided
Just for today rain
The calmness of storming winds
The warmth of my sweater the smell of food
And good steaming love of my rice cooker
The cuddles of the fog
My imaginary cat slinking in the corner and for the first time
In a long time
I feel safe and happy I use to
In toddler like aw
I wish I could keep these warm sleepy
Drippy rain feelings
Like one keeps candy in a glove box
Or a song in your head
Just this feel good feelings on loop
Melancholy but good enough to ease the ache I’ve felt since I left my childhood behind
​and adulthood began
Robin MacCuish Oct 2018
Sometimes I know you don’t know me
You don’t respect me
You accept me like blank stares and awkward silences in dinning rooms
Where I trust you to be to support me
I fall on the unforgiving dirt road of denial

I finally get myself now
Where on the map I am
You my compass
I understand now
You will always lead me away
From blue sky’s to grey


I know now where all my insecurities came to be
Where they grew their roots thick and deep around my soul

The map I read makes it all to clear to see
Robin MacCuish Oct 2018
I’ve stopped trying to please the people I cannot please
And in exchange I find myself looking to please me
I’ve stopped trying to find goals and achieve expensive pieces of paper
Cause I’m the end we are going to the same place proper.
Heaven or **** in dirt encrested ground
Embalmed or silent ash making microbial sounds
Robin MacCuish Sep 2018
I started to feel in colors
The day I got rid of my feelings
Tucked them under my eyelids
And brushed tears away like
I was making wishes on silly
Stray eyelashes

Pink is such a distressing color
Bright light pink
Or the yellow of caution tape hue
Becoming as bright at the sun
All screaming
They can’t hear you
And when they do
They don’t like you
Robin MacCuish Sep 2018
Why do you treat me so
why do i let you?
Robin MacCuish Sep 2018
You stole me then added me on, to become a part of you.
but honey
I am the house extension that shouldn't have been invested in
I am the shell to your hermit crab always
disposable as the plastic rain found in the landfills of our futures.
A wasteland of mass proportions
to which you will find treasures or trash
depending on the man you are
And you will certainly only find trash.
And oh honey baby, my dear, I am only but a treasure.
Robin MacCuish Aug 2018
It sticks to the back of my throat
like peanut butter
It sits back there like a frog
and I croak croak croak,
but it never escapes my quivering lips
It never leaves me
It never makes itself known
But it hopes like every little insecurity I've ever owned
that you will see it one day
accept it one day
read bedtime stories to it
feed it food from your dinner table
cloth it as it wants to be clothed
support it like you are the keystone
to my door
to the world, I deserve to belong in
yet I still only manage to look at it
from the blurry red plexiglass windows

I hear voices from beyond it
Be brave.
Be brave.
It gets better
little one.

But when I look out that window
I hear the depressions and suppressions of a people
gunshots and violence
and somewhere off in the distance
I hear the singing laughter and joy

Be brave
Be brave
little one

but they are as far as my voice is trapped and away from me
and as tangible as the frog in my throat
Stuck in Pandora's box
with a million others just like me.
Next page