It's slowly dwindling away
Crumbling into pieces
That can never be repaired
Breaking down to the point
Of no return

I'm loosing it
The ability to feel
To give in to my emotions
Its as if my sanity
Slowly sinks into oblivion

I used to have them
Feelings of joy
Of sadness and pain
Of anger and lust
Or even love

But as the days pass by
And age catches up
My heart begins to harden
To feel as cold as ice
Like I'm barely even alive

I was once a young boy
With eyes full of dreams
And a heart full of courage
An unwaivering mindset
To take the world head on

But Reality was cruel
I kept searching for happiness
But all it gave was pain
And as I succumbed to endless pain
I started to not care at all

Years passed by and yet
I still struggle in the pain
I still endure the bitterness
Stuck on my mouth
As if it were candies

Soon after I'm left here
Wanting to feel again
Wanting my chest to swell
With anger or excitement
I don't even care which

I just want to start feeling again
For time to move from hereon
To exist again in this timeline
To love and lose once more
To experience emotions like so

They still evade me though
The feelings that once coloured
The corners of my heart
And graced the different periods
Of my rollercoaster life

Someday I may lose it all
The emotions that once
Made me feel alive
I'm a dead man walking right now
Just waiting for the final execution

I hope someone intervenes
I hope that phone call comes
The call thats saves me from
This endless pit I don't want to go to
An emotionless and dull damnation

Because I don't wanna lose it all
I just want to feel that I exist
And that I am worth something
That I am worth saving
And I deserve to be alive even as the mess I truly am

I simply want to feel again..

the gulls
flying by
their wings
shrouded in the morning mist
or silhouetted against a bleeding sun

From the top of the world
ribbons of ice
etch a path to the sea
Crumbling at the shore
icebergs drift
and melt
as sunlight lingers
whales sing and seals play
in blue depths unseen
the ocean floor splits apart
yielding the earths burning core
fountains of fire
hiss at the sea
in a cloud of steam
an island is born
with trees that bend
in relentless wind
the darkest storms
move on
leaving mist and light
dancing in the meadow
rainbows sparkle
on the lake's surface
while golden trout dart below
the sun slips behind the mountain
filling the valley
in cool shadows
the cabin looks warm
a crackling fire inside
someone smiling by the door