When the soft rain and distant birds
Play in a May's afternoon,
Look out the window and listen close
For they'll be gone by June.

In the night to jump a fence
As people out of tune,
Run and wander through the course
Beneath the rainy moon.

We made it blue, the most loyal colour
Plunges into ocean
Surrenders up to skies
Blurs the constant motion
With longing it implys
The truest of emotion
The most loyal colour.

When I sleep dreams please take head
I’m not accustomed to this speed
spliced with music art and ****
this rhyme a warning and a plead:
Many men look back at me
their eyes memorize silently
I trade in who I used to be
degenerating empathy.
Friends no more are there as well
waving constantly farewell
who they are now I can’t tell
heavy water stains still dwell.
Though no longer what you were
your name a prayer spoken unsure
Instills the fact there is no cure
clear direction- violent blur;
I am a man and I’m a boy
both utensil and a toy
immoral morals, high decoy
let flirt with death, young cold and coy..
So please I beg you, dreams of pain
let sleep consume me, peace sustain
let night air fill my broken brain
through the wind myself retrain
        Let me wade in water deep,
    let my faith forwardly leap
worry sow and disdaine reap

Troubled Poppies for Endless Sleep.

After were gone
my heart will sit out
on the lawn
And my mind back in our den.
I'm blessed and charmed to be a Pon,
That much I comprehend.
Never wonder- always ill be, grateful till the end:

but an abnormal load of guilt, you see
I feel always & constantly

You wont say, but I still know,
that the ride of life I drive too slow.
Somehow, every loving act,
answered question, & proven fact
I took to quickly, wisdom lacked,
my psyche now barley intact.

for drugs are my defining trait...
never imagined as my fate...
I had it too good, I still have it so...
What the **** will I do when both of you go?
I can barley get by, the extent you don’t know,
of the Eric sacrificed, revert I don’t grow.

I may look like a man, but you know that I'm not
there is so much much more I need to be taught.

Lying in thick dark
the candle we made glows warm,
burns away my time.

A - the atrocity that my life has become
D - the damage, and still,  im not done
D - the denial, the doom in the vile,  dangerous, daunting; forever defile
I - the image I fake of myself, I- my constant &chronic; bad health.
C- the cost of a chemical wealth.
T for the tension, paranoia and fear. Yet it’s the letter that symbols it’s here.  
I - irrational, insensible, intense. I - irresistible iridescence .
O- for the option that I didn’t take, O for the others that still I forsake.
And N for nervous. Nauseous. Night. N, the neophyte, turned narcissist knight.

Transparent to everyone, how its hold is too true
So clear its invisible, Addiction did coo:  

“when you wake and feel my crave,
and all my charms  different behave;
resistance, strength, pain & choice,
may mute my spell,  quiet my voice.”
“embrace what little light is shed”  suggested addiction, faintly he said:

“For I can **** the best man dead,
with only shadows in their head.”

The simplest act might be someone’s cure-
I remembered when it was
a knowing look from a real friend,  
heals more then medicine does.

Although alone often we are
and it’s quite the sad affair-
back to that look I do retreat and
life is blessed to bare.

When I’ve gone a little hard
and sobriety’s days away
a real friend’s presence, brief or not
reminds me I’m okay.

So grateful am I, its appreciation like guilt-
I can’t deserve a love so true.
a feeling so many don’t even know
I’m overcome I actually do.

Thank You:
With all my heart, my friends,
the real ones may be few-
but to remind me that I’m loved;
well, I need no more than you.