I lay myself in the line
Naked and vulnerable
You plastered a sweet smile
Sliced my heart in two

Trust flows without a thought
Joy radiates
Who knew I played
Right into your game

I let myself be free
Fully exposed to scrutiny
You took the opportunity
And broke me completely

Fear cripples me
I can't trust anymore
I can't go near you
You radiate the pain I feel.

Two days ago I arrived home late
I dropped my keys, from the eerie silence
Sobs from someone I cannot see
Pools of a crimson color under my feet.

I choke and cower in fear
What happened? What?
Too much, I ran into the abyss
As much as I walked, I couldn't forget.

Shivering from the sight afar
Eyes closed shut awaiting what could
There's a light far ahead
A bench that meets my end

I slump onto the wooden miracle
As I sat watching liquid drip
Ahead, there's a glimmering gold
Before me, shining crystals

Are you all right? Asks a passerby
I'm fine, just go along
Then a pain like a hammer onto my skull
Holding my skull until the memory leaks

Everything will be fine, says someone above
How can you know?
Look before you, said the passerby
And there I lie, red vs white.

But, there was no one
Until I heard sirens in the dark
I neared the body but all I saw was a reflection
Mind inside a body that trapped me in my own memories.

**** me, **** me now

To whom do I grant the wish of disappearing?

Will my silence be evidence of my invisibility?

Or are the smoke coming out of my ears enough?

Is the redness of my face from anger or passion?

But let me tell you this, your eyes will turn black.

More than the combination
Of Math and English,
More than the uncertainty
Of sour bitterness

Don’t I deserve better?

Then the hours upon hours
Of monotonous words
Then the blaring and the whistling
Of simultaneous noise


Don’t I deserve better?

More than the giggling
Flock of girls
More than the chants of
Your irritating name

Don’t I deserve better

To compete arrogance
With compassion
To argue utmost uncertainty
With obvious honesty

Don’t I deserve better?

Than the continuous
Anxiety
Than the pressure to
Ignore

Don’t I deserve better?

To choose what should
Be chosen
To love for uncertainty
One who does

Don’t I deserve better?
To love those who love me
To ignore those who misplace me
To finally be with someone of my choosing
But it rarely works that way,

Will I ever deserve better?

One – I took a test
Two – I passed the test
Three – I went to class
Four – I studied for tests
Five – I practiced and practiced
Six – I joined in
Seven – I reviewed
Eight – I cried
Nine – I broke down
Ten – I accepted

Watch as the words are left to savor
Listen as the room mystifies
Smell as until it can be felt
Taste as it lingers in the silence
Feel as the aroma wafts around you.