I see you everyday, the quite girl a million miles away. Head in the clouds or in a book.
I find myself stuck to your hook. And as you pull me to the shore I feel myself sway away.
I'm under your spell. Is this heaven or is it hell?  Your a million miles away. Yet I see you everyday.
A shooting star I cannot catch, the flickering light of my last match.
I can't tell if this is a broken romance. I know you can feel it too. Will our vindication please come through.
I don't want to be the one to utter: I missed you.

I was so willing to
fight for you
but you took away
my armour and
stabbed me
in the back.

I have two sides
there's the one you see
happy, vibrant and selfless
and the one behind locked doors
depressed, broken and dying

I'd die for you.
You would'nt even fight for me.
I'd cry for you.
You wouln't even lie for me.
I'd catch a bullet for you.
You would still be living life free.
I'd lay awake all night for you.
You wouldnt even dream of me.
I never gave up on you.
You gave up on me....

I gave my tormentor the title of best friend
because for once,
it felt like someone saw me the same way I did.
I fell in love with a boy who bruised instead of kissed
because for once,
I didnt have to be the one to beat myself up.

He was a monster
that I so badly wanted to charm
because for once,
it wasn't my problems I was struggling to solve.

I think I've finally run out of ways to poetically say I miss holding you in my arms.

When gentle breezes turn into gale,
     remember that you will prevail.

       You may tear at these pages daily,
in search of peace and tranquillity.
   Planting hope and scattering wishes,
    Spilling blood in smears and blemishes...
       Flying out of the dark on
     wings of birds.
       Bridging the rippling void through
           severed words.

                Seeking...
             Reaching...
               Imploring...
            Writing...

     Be not wary of eyes that speak.
  Be not afraid of mouths that leak.

Know that our scribbles are only
   sacred to us.
       Emotions and thoughts we
           bind and truss.

  What we put forth, we owe it to ourselves...
     Bits of us we've kept hidden in the
darkest rooms; atop the highest shelves.

You...
      are wielder of your mighty pen.
You...
      determine how far or long your
         words would span.

   Your words... They're precious gold.
Many or little; be them new or old.

So let drip your ink with little reservation...
  Let us grow from strength to strength
     as life teaches its lessons.

   Rise up and live on in these here pages,
     For here exist only
         freedom;
               not cages.

"I want to live just once.", I whispered to my own shadow one lonely night.
"I want to live once and taste freedom on the tip of my tongue. I want the fire of determination to burn inside me and keep me warm on a cold night like this instead of the cigarette that I smoke. I want to taste the stinging love as it rolls down my throat, tensing every muscle in my body, and please me with the pain. I want to feel loved till I evaporate into million particles and float away with the winds of summer. I want to smile so hard that my cheeks hurt and my heart explode as I drink the poison of happiness from the hands of my own life. I want to break down and cry like a thunderstorm that takes everything down with it. And once that all is done, I want to face death. I want to look into its eyes as it makes love with me one last time. I want to feel death holding me close before taking me with it forever into the land from where no one can ever return. "
"I just want to live once", I whispered to my shadow as it disappeared with the last flicker of the burning candle.

I feel dry and
empty
like a dried up well
I can feel the black thoughts
taking over my mind
Whispering
sweet evil nothings
in my ear
dripping with honey laced poison
I feel the depression
sinking into my bones
taking root in my blood stream
and poisoning my mind
I feel the hatred
slowly infecting my soul
like cancer
it never goes away
I feel the cracks forming
slowly, subtly
spreading across my skin
like spider webs
just waiting until I break
I feel myself start to shatter
the darkness within
leaking out
infecting those around me
and at the same time
******* in the world's evil shadows
my body now a host for
the dark light I always adored
Madness
taking residency in my eyes
Hatred
poisoned my soul
Depression
made my flesh and blood
overtook my mind
lives in my bones
and now I see only red
all I know is the bitter taste of life
and the sweet honey of poison
I live with the dark light
it thrives inside me
and soothes the burning of my heart
I no longer know myself
I love the moon
the chaos she brings
and the innocent screams
of her victims
as the madness takes over