Elizabethanne

Elizabethanne Jul 2021

The Vow

Confess to me
All those little truths
you haven’t let leave your mouth since they were first branded in
I want to witness all the pieces of you-
Gone and shredded at your very own hands
What sweet hell
do you have flicker behind your eyelids
when you’ve turned your voice into a siren going off
in middle of our bedroom
Will you relay them to me in the morning
while we bask in the roughed around life
we’ve scraped up for ourselves
Will you let me love you
even when you think it’s the last thing
I would ever really want to do

- I know I can’t make you better but I can stay anyway

#love #relationship #emotional #forever

Elizabethanne Jul 2021

A Storm Is Coming

Willows unearth themselves
all along the coast line of this small beach town
They spend the off season gnarled-
empty & reaching
stretching towards the shipwrecked siren call of the waters below
these willows dropping in the ocean are weeping
And so am I

#storm #problem #sad #empty #anger #happy #thinking #life #death

Elizabethanne Jul 2021

This Is Trying

Remember
when you weren’t given enough sunshine
so you
s t r e t c h e d
as far as you could to reach it
Remember
when you woke up
to flames
licking at your lungs &
half remembered people
screaming your name
Remember
the apology
you kept behind your teeth
for the person in the mirror
(I am sorry I can’t be enough)
I am sorry this apology
feels so brittle you hope
it doesn’t shatter and make you choke
Remember
when you got up
the next day and the next night
and every single time after that

- Do you remember when you kept going

#survive #sad #anger #love #self #wow #sorry #happy #shame #journey

Elizabethanne Jul 2021

What is Home?

The first place you call yourself-
a monster
where you admit
that you- are a liar
Home is
where you learn becoming human
Tethered inside stitched up skin
you have enough emotions to-
spill out
But home is-
wanting for many things and getting none of them
Half-feral and doing everything to not bite the hands that feed
You fold and fold and fold
until you are smaller-
until you are not even really there at all
 
- Home is where you go to disappear

#sad #ponder #anger #family #nervous #shame

Elizabethanne Feb 2021

Unravel

I take my skin
unstitching it from my body
ringing it out to dry in my bathroom tub
It’s weary and needs a moment to be laid to rest
All of it is covered in dirt-
After taking responsibility for its mother
apologizing for its brother and for its own feelings
Shame coats it-
only I couldn’t tell you who the shame belongs to
I’m only exposed heart and bone right now
please do not mind the blood I leave at your feet
This is all I have left over as an apology

- when do we stop letting other peoples mistakes become our own
- I am still trying to figure it out

#sad #love #family #angry #nervous #shame

Elizabethanne Jan 2021

Stripped

I strip myself of everything that makes me
Myself
And then ask
Who am I?

#sad #love #angry

Elizabethanne Dec 2020

What Does Forever Look Like?

When I am finally laid to rest
I want to walk up to those pearl gates
Show them
my blood drenched hands of good intentions

(Look at what I’ve done in the name of love)

When I am finally laid to rest
I want to look at those angels
plead to them
these sins of mine
Take em please
I need you to endure them
(Show me Show me Show me)
What forgiveness looks like

- I’ve spent my entire life giving out forgiveness like it cost me nothing

#anger #forgiveness #love #wow #god #sad