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 Oct 2017 Bibek
girl diffused
now swallow your words
for that matter your tongue too
spit out saltwater
1. They tell blatant lies.
2. They deny they ever said anything, even if you have proof.
3. They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition.
4. They wear you down over time.
5. Their actions do not match their words.
6. They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you.
7. They know confusion weakens people.
8. They project.
9. They try to align people against you.
10. They tell you or others that you are crazy.
11. They tell you everyone else is a liar.

- taken from, "11 Signs of Gaslighting in a Relationship" from PsychologyToday (https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/11-signs-gaslighting-in-relationship)
 Oct 2017 Bibek
girl diffused
i only learned value
after i picked
through my wreckage
he left me as a broken house
derelict splintered wood
peeling paint
broken shutters
i fed myself softer things
rebuilt myself on a river
and married the earth
It takes a while but eventually the pain recedes. It becomes acrid first, then bitter, then bittersweet, and finally it will taste like nothing at all.
 Oct 2017 Bibek
girl diffused
Sleek dark hair
Highlights of auburn, color of fall
Stern lips
A look of austerity in the dark russet eye
Skin lighter than my own
The smaller wrist
Large eyes
Faint deepening crow's feet
Nursing knowledge
Small, short, slight, petite, and strong
Maternal vanguard
Matriarchal
Beautiful and earthly
Scorpionic elusiveness
Her unused canvas
Frequent Homegoods purchased
Shifts decor in the livingroom like a Feng Shui practitioner
Laughs at the absurdity of modern horror movies
Smells like bath wash and too much perfume
Smells of my childhood
Smells of my innocence
Paperbacks of Hugo and Austen in boxes in the basement
Paperbacks of The Symposium and a biography of Marx in the basement
Secretly likes to cook
Culinary explorer
Gastronomically open
Culinary door opener
Very little circle of friends
Outspoken
Austerity on the small mouth
Austerity in the small mouth
Conviction in her voice
Soft graphite in her voice
Has a lisp sometimes
The slight overbite(?)
Immigrant parent
Unnaturalized citizen
Reminds me of fall
Reminds me of everything
Reminds me of very little at once
Life-teacher, one of many
Protective
Over-protective
Pushy
The way her hand moves on her tablet
The way her voice sounded during a lecture when I was a child
The way she used to hug
Closet full of shoes and clothes she rummages through when she's going out
Meticulous cleaner
The way her voice sounded when she tried to make sense of me
The way her voice sounds
...
List poetry. An experiment in profiling a close loved one.
 Oct 2017 Bibek
Inga
This is a prayer
for the Children of Aleppo
Whose tragedy was concealed before the eyes of the giants
Whose tears never had a chance to fall down to the ground
My Lord, my Almighty One
Keep these children
Welcome them back to Your arms
Let them feel loved again
Help them subside the pain they felt
Fill their newly-furnished rooms
With songs and laughter
Let them forget the scent of gunpowder and bombs
Teach them how to smile once more
Bring back the glimmer in their eyes
And as for those who still breathe to survive
Conceal them with Your love and immense protection
Let them know that beneath the ends of the earth
There would always be a sunrise
A new day
Where they could draw their stories
And dance their dreams
With those eyes
staring into blank distance
Bewildered,
Unaware of what will happen next
Let them hear my voice
A small voice of cheering them up
For this is all I could do for now
How foolish am I
Lavishly sitting on a comfortable bed
Under a secured roof
Writing a poem for those who gained my sympathy
But You know
There's more to that
Let them reach this
I want to tell them
How much they could change this world
Hang on tight
Believe me

Each and everyone of you
are tougher than any fighter this history could ever tell.

— The End —