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Aspen Jul 2020
And like rage, your words
boil inside me.
it’s like I don’t even know you
Aspen Jul 2020
I could feel my fathers gaze as I played with the food on my plate.
𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦, 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.
“Aspen, are you okay?”
The wire in my throat tightened,
rain poured from my eyes.
I can smile and say yes to anyone but you and mom.
  Jun 2020 Aspen
Audrey Maday
Dear Future Lover of His,
Please listen to my words,
I want him to be safe,
In only a way which I know.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Please lay your heart on his chest,
Every day, twice a day,
And listen to his heart beat,
Make sure it is normal, on pace,
For if it isn't,
Something is wrong.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Buy blue Monster for him,
Before every soccer game,
For the pain and fear of seeing him,
Panting and passed out,
Delirious, is not worth any pain,
On Earth.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Don't pressure him to play guitar,
He will play for you when he truly wants,
And when his memories finally let him.

Dear Future Lover of His,
When he is drunk and sobbing,
Saying it is his fault,
Lay his head on your lap,
Pet his hair gently,
And remind him simply,
It is not.

Dear Future Lover of His,
When his anxiety hits,
Pull his hair for him,
And rub his neck,
Whisper sweet things in his ears,
And do not get upset,
When he doesn't want to be in,
Every one of your photos.

Dear Future Lover of His,
When he asks you what to draw,
Give him an endless list of suggestions,
So that his hands may never rest.

Dear Future Lover of His,
On June 15th,
Take him away from home,
Remind him endlessly how you love him so,
Then take him to the nearest parkour park,
And watch him run for hours.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Let him teach you soccer,
Because watching him play,
And go easy on you,
Is the sweetest thing you'll ever taste.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Never hold the past against him,
And please don't worry,
He hates your worrying the most.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Understand he needs alonetime,
Even if you need his time,
All the time.

Dear Future Lover of His,
Please be gentle, and kind,
Please let him love you for as long as he can,
And maybe you're place will replace mine,
The one where I am supposed to be,
For he needs someone to be there,
A rock, a constant,
And all I want is for him to be,
Happy.
  Jun 2020 Aspen
Betty H
Each warm summer eve
When the moon peeks from a cloud
I gaze at his face

When his lips pop up
I'm convinced he views my grin
It causes a giggle

When his lips sink down
I wonder about his mood
Do I change him so?

Eyes shut late at night
I see the moon in my dreams
no clouds to hide him
Aspen Jun 2020
Man
You are safe in my arms,
where my size
is not to harm you,
but to protect the parts
of you that are vulnerable.
Self Love>Self Destruction
Aspen Jun 2020
As I listened to his shuddering breath
I wondered
“Would he go in the dark of the night,
Or the light of the day?”
As the pause between each breath
grew larger than the last,
I felt my heart sink
down
down
down
It’s hard to watch someone be at the mercy of death
Aspen Jun 2020
***
And so I undress myself
not for you,
but so I might be more
open for love.
I don’t want to do this for nothing.
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