She looked up into the sky and smiled. "I don't want to die" She finally knew what had spoken to her, inside  her head, in her dreams, the thing that pushed her along her path. It wasn't the light in Michael. Because The ark angel wasn't her creator...he was a distant part of who she was but, he had been so far removed she didn't know him. She said it again. "I don't want to die"  And she felt the air around her ripple with heart ace, with human pain. if she could have spared her creator this pain I hoped she would have. 'But I do, I am dyeing, because my life is filled with 'its just one name they call me its nothing' but my life if I let this go will all turn into 'its nothings' I will be nothing, and I don't want to live to see the end of this journey...I don't want to see a part of me die in the end because you will, its how it would have always turned out Nanoen, it ends with your death...and mine.' The pain that her creator felt reverberated threw Nanoen's  bones....The one who had written out her life, the one who had made her into what she was ,wanted to die. in her heart Nanoen knew that she was made up of the broken peace's of her creators heart, the hidden scars and all that her creator hoped to be. "Then take my strength, I am a part of you, and you have made me for a propos.....you are my mother, my creator...if no one reads the story you have written no one will ever know me..and I might as well be dead...You wrote me up in a book for a resin..to help the kids who need a light....do not end your life...pleas do not end mine I am a character in a book ...but pleas listen to your heart because it is what is saying this...do not end your life, because you'll take me with you, the world you created.....and you will take away someone's resin to live...." I paused, this person I had made up was a part of me...and a part of me did not want to die....but was that part bigger than the on that did...

sometimes I wish I could turn back time
to those better days
when I didn't dream of death and want to slip away
I find myself thinking about you
what do you think it would be like
to look in the mirror and hate who you see
to think about your flaws not what I see
some days are better and then some are not
you think your worthless but I think your worth it
you wont hear me because your music's blaring
you draw a picture and write down the names
of every kid or person who made you feel that way
now I guess I must agree when I see you cry I feel a bit of sympathy
I wish I could turn back time
to some better day
when you would pull your ear buds out and listen to what I had to say
your hearts of gold
your mind of silver
made up of beautiful things
don't let words give you a sliver
**your not worthless now stop caring about what they think
your not worthless now stop caring about what they think

My heart was cold and my walls were high
I felt safe weir I lye
Then you came and you tore them down
now it hurts not to have you around
weir did you go now and are you coming back
I asked you to stay but you had to go
you left me alone and I'm getting cold
I don't know if I can hold
weir did you go with my heart
you said I would see you again
I feel so lost when your not around
pleas don't let me lose you again
My kingdoms falling all around me
My Queen has lost herself
My heart is yours but you are lost now
I think I might fall I have no more walls
now if you can still hear me know i love you
but you've left me with no protection
so say good bye for the last time
I hope you keep my heart warm tonight
let my memory strengthen you
always know my heart belongs to you

some days will be darker than others
said the angel to his fallen brothers
don't be sad because your Abigail's black sheep
your hearts did follow the sound of a different drum beet
you see kids these days are filled with broken dreams and hearts of hate
they cut up their wrists as they try to cry away the pain
some people don't see that their words could ****
they don't see the ones who cry standing on the window sill
kids barley fifteen years old some younger writing their last note
screaming out how much they hate the world
tears falling because of a stupid ****** girl
your kids their afraid to walk down the hall
because they know no one cares about them at all
you see you need to open your eyes
think about your words before more kids die

sometimes I think about smoking **** but then I'm like better not
sometimes I think I can be brave but then I start to cave
some days I want to go up to you but then I think you'll reject me
I second guess every thing I do
I second guess the makeup I weir the shape of my hair
the way I look in the mirror all because of you

im a loner in a world of stoners
im a conservative compared to other girls
im the one who goes to church
but I am still human and my heart still hurts
I am not the perfect child
my parents can attest to that
I am not happy with my body my scars the proof  
but I am only human a selfish creature
I am a liar by nature
if you ask me if I am all rite I will say yeah
if you ask me if im hungry now will be it
I don't have scars because I am smart enough not to let them leave a mark
but mine are deep cut in my heart