I once knew an old man from Dubuque
who every so often, would puke
his weak constitution
that had no solution
so, he always carried a toque

Ewwww :D
#humor   #limerick   #toque  

I just can't get it together
Problems, including the weather
Plan and try
As time goes by
They can't hold me back forever

#forever   #try   #limerick   #plan   #determined  

There were many who believed in ideals,
Fretting about in their heels,
With bollards and plackards,
They marched and nattered,
All hell they would repeal.

ISIS let rip in the east,
Fear more important than peace,
Assad called the Russians
We heard the percussion,
Aleppo mourned daily deceased.

The climate was caught unawares,
When it realised nobody cares,
The smog came in strong,
Al Gore wasn't wrong,
When people flirt with despair.

Brexit was no laughing matter,
The public blind to what they were after,
Trigger at the ready,
It isn't looking steady,
For a kingdom with too many actors. 

Trump, we thought at first glance,
Didn't have much of a chance,
But Hilary's scandal,
Left the US at a stand still,
Now the world's in Russia's trance.

Farewell to the icons we'll pine,
Our culture was built on their spine,
Prince, Bowie and George,
With legends we forged
The moments that will surpass time.

Ireland became a haven for a few
Pity there wasn't a queue,
With a fight for corporate heads
Banks left dry and bled,
Tech an oligopoly? Who knew.

Aleppo left drenched with no fate,
The little reaction to late,
UN cries unheard,
Media reports blurred.
It's hard to keep up at this rate.

Silicon Valley is offering free food,
to workers becoming robots or goods,
12 hour days,
extraordinary pay,
But with no creativity they're screwed!

Sporting greats made their way to the stage,
this year's Olympics causing outrage,
medals were plenty,
seats were empty,
And controversy graced every front page.

Here we go blindfolded into 2017
Only the wealthy living the dream,
while most young folk,
believe politics a joke,
Tell me, is it time for a new regime?

#past   #limerick   #mourning   #2016  

There once was a student at college
Who fancied the boys more than knowledge
She could have been best
But she lagged all the rest
Her interest in learning was smalledge

found this on a scrap of paper buried on my desk.  don't remember writing it.  hope I did.
Temporal Fugue
Temporal Fugue
Dec 28, 2016

So I'm told in Albany, there lives a little man
He's two foot at pinnacle, Napoleonic of demand
It's not his stature that makes me laugh, or his tiny angered rotund face
But the way his body jumps and shakes
And still can't get above my waist

Dragging in some of my AP stuff, as I've hit a small dearth of creativity :D
Temporal Fugue
Temporal Fugue
Dec 27, 2016

There is in London town, a clown, who works at all the pubs
A frivolous demeanor, and usefulness with clubs
As a bouncer and a cad, he's known both far and wide
Mock not the clown, named Prancer, or you'll wish, that you had died

Yup, I think he's a relation of mine. ;D
It's still the season!
#humor   #limerick   #clown  
Dec 19, 2016

I used to only wear skinny jeans
Even if it were hotter than it seemed
Then puberty hit
And I had to quit
'Cause my hips aren't nearly as lean

Some people grow out of fashions mentally; I can no longer fit into a pair of skinny jeans.
Jack Jenkins
Jack Jenkins
Dec 13, 2016

So it seems donuts are the order today
I'll lay them out like a buffet
You can gorge and feast
Like you're a donut beast
But I'm telling you, you forgot to pay

Written 20 February 2016... my first limerick
Dec 10, 2016

I bounced about on a noisy train
Lost in thoughts of last night's pain
Then the window changed my view
Of all I saw and thought I knew
In ways too complex to explain.

Nothing like a train journey to get the creative juices dripping.
Nov 30, 2016

There was an old man on my street,
Who resembled a pig made for meat;
He cussed and he drank
He fought and he stank,
'till a car squished him into concrete!

#drunk   #fight   #evil   #old   #ugly   #limerick   #twisted   #pig   #cuss  
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