The rage bubbles

Like lave trapped in a cage

The pain troubles

my poor little page.




I write about madness 

my poor little brain 

it feels me going mad

As I write my last refrain




The happiness seeping in 

as the voices try to win 

They aren't doing a very good job 

cause they soon turn into a blob




The happiness lets me know I won 

the war of surviving a day more

I let the sadness go

As I reach for the light

to let the good dreams come

after another day won

A man drifts near in a cloak.
All black, ghastly looking.
Move closer to the man.

Who is he? Who is he? Who is he?

Reach up to his hood.
Pull down.
Nothing but a pitch black void resides where his head should be.

Who is he? Who is he? Who is he?

Reach into the void.
Swarms of fear, sadness, and anger engulfs the mind.
Screams, matched with whispers flood the ears.
The internal voice drowns, and dies in the midst of the noise.
Pull the hand out.
Cold, grey, silence strikes.
Unnerving silence in the absence of the chaos.
The void drifts away.

Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?

Bre   Ak  
                                     Ing
                                                      Apa   rt
                              at

                                                Th      E

      V   er  
       Y                    
                            Sea Ms



Lis   Ten
    To                                 Me            

    BLE
                               ED


Tr    Y
               To
                                Hel  p
  Me
               Se e


But
                  T    He
        On   Ly
                               Thi    Ng
    I
                     S ee
            Is
                          My
                               En ding

I've been lost in thought
Not saying the important things like hey, hello, please don't say that
It's not like I had forgotten. But I didn't rightly remember, either
The world keeps spinning but I don't notice
I have forgotten the forgotten, and in doing so, the world has forgotten me
I'm not pleased to say but the world was going to burn anyway
Who cares if I burn with it, if I spin with it, or if I live with it
There is no point in caring about the forgotten, no point in remembering
So why bother trying to forget the remembered or remember the forgotten
It's a paradoxical nightmare you can't get rid of
So I just think and think and think until I'm lost

Under the sky of twinkling stars

I lay

Wondering what went wrong

Why did you hurt me

You crushed my dreams

Left me with nothing

But PTSD




You became the king

I became the grunt

The monster came out

When you were drunk




You cursed

You struck

You drank

You bought




I blocked it out

For so long

Until it came back to me

Destroying me

Leaving me in shambles




I wish I could turn back time

Change the past

Make everything alright

But I can't




I can never change what you did

You try to make it up to me

But we both know you can't

Now I'm always paranoid

Always clingy

Afraid people will leave me

Thanks for everything

I cried out beautiful anxiety
It’s a pity you heard
You took me in
I might be more trouble than I’m worth
You saw the monsters in me
You looked past it
You saw the dimmed light
And sought to make it shine