As I grew older,

The city unfurled itself to me,

And in a moment it would shrink

And be texture-less much like that of

A brown kite's wings having taken flight -



     Places and time shrink over the years

     And I don't recall my grandparents' house

     Being so small when I visit them now.

     I don't recall yesterday's birthday celebration

     With friends as a ten year old event  -



These roads are so familiar

The vastness of my surroundings

In my youth is now long gone

Albeit the vastness of the world

Is an appalling thought, my love



While you leave trails

Where I may never go,

I can only imagine the speck

I've become in your vision.

I feel restlessness
for what has happened;
A melancholy looming,
making me question my life,
A selfish bout of thoughts in a frenzy,
in my head.

It's all in my head.
They've taken me hostage,
in my head.

I stalk the dead,
their facebook pages,
galleries of hope and positiveness -
much like these carefree days -
both brought to a halt,
taken to their beds.  
               And I dare compare.
               Even my past affairs.
               Who I am, and what’s not there.
              
Two years of not having cried,
now, this day, I realize,
all the hardness that hardened inside,
was all just in my head.

In my head
They've taken me hostage,
in my head.

When Bonny came,
Bonny didn't know what Bonny had done,
Bonny triggered a gun.
Bonny made sense.

I felt the rush
of blood as it gushed out -
no more a stream,
but an ocean of vast tomorrows
and fragile dreams
inside a fragile being -
For the fragile being is most vivid
when in love, and
when the senses are above all

Nonsensical.
Irrational.

Dense! with idiocy

I forgot in a moment
all my woes.
Bonny made sense.

When Bonny looked away
Bonny didn't know Bonny made me sad,
Bonny came at a time I wish I never had.

Death is not the greatest tragedy,

Great tragedies begin
Where stories don't end,
In death, or in life;

In life - "what might have happened?"
is the slow poison that wears
us down, with hearts heavy
and hollow, waiting for answers
'till death.

And death is not the greatest tragedy.
Life left incomplete is.

Perhaps when life has
No choice but to freeze
Like a statue -

When it is faced
To face a long,
Troublesome wall -

You'll realize that
The people you helped atop
Aren't quite there anymore,

And that you've left behind
The ones who've always
Stood behind you.

As to why you are alone,

You'll know by the
Air in-between
Your clenched fists,

The simplest answers
are the hardest
to grasp.

When there is no
Path ahead,
Going back,
Is the only Path.

The little green specks died
When we opened our eyes,
And you made a grave for them

You looked at me and asked,
"Why?"

That day we both cried
Knowing that fireflies could only last so long

As buildings and tea stalls
and compiled garbage
passed by us, and led to other
buildings and tea stalls
and compiled garbage,
it was clear that the road ahead had many
turns and twists.

It was clear that
if, and only if, we went straight
we'd end up colliding into a building, or a tea stall,
or compiled garbage.

But fortunately for us,
  we know better.

You thought to buy me a skyscraper,
    but you knew I wouldn't bear its weight
You thought to buy me a home by the country,
    but you knew I wouldn't stay in it too long
You thought to buy me a tree-house,
    but you knew I wouldn't climb trees
So you bought yourself a bucket and
with its help you built for me a sandcastle by the shore;
I couldn't refuse,
   and at that moment I grasped your hands and held onto them tightly.

And even though that sand castle doesn't stand there by the shore,
Your gift to me is always for you to keep, and for me to be thankful for.