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 Oct 2014 Tiffanie Noel Doro
Day
Break your back over
my heart three times &
claim it's body poetry.

Knock on wood & pray
Zeus didn't hear you.

You say you know no better,
but I've seen the malice in your eyes the
moment before our lips touch & I am
afraid; I love it.

Trust you trust you trust you..
Why would you beg I trust you?

You knew from the second you
saw me that you would end up
covering me in kisses the way
lava covered Pompeii
& giddily watch as I suffer when
you leave me to dry.

You are so heartachingly beautiful,
&, as the daughter of Apollo, I am
obligated to let the son of Aphrodite know;
my father was the brightest star
until nineteen years ago.
*
Sorry, Daddy,
I know you told me never to love a man anything like you.
I Don't know anyone anymore,
It's like they've grown up without me.
I wasn't a missing link,
But only a useless one.
A glimpse of my world at the moment. There is a whole poem, but it's not something I wish to share. Yet.

My world has come crashing down my shoulders.
Smiling seems to be a sin.
I don't know anything anymore.
Within a room somewhere
Sits Pandora
Holding the box that
She opened long ago
When her heart was curious and naive

Now her heart is heavy
And tears fill her eyes
Hope is weak
Hope is shriveling
If only she hadn’t
Set loose the monsters

She wishes people
Saw hope
The way she does
Leaking out slowly
Filling the air
Pulsating, Shaking
Glowing

Maybe if they understood
They would hold on
Just a little longer
For their monsters
To die

Because in the end
The hero always wins
You just need to be there
To See it
When I was a windy boy and a bit
And the black spit of the chapel fold,
(Sighed the old ram rod, dying of women),
I tiptoed shy in the gooseberry wood,
The rude owl cried like a tell-tale ***,
I skipped in a blush as the big girls rolled
Nine-pin down on donkey's common,
And on seesaw sunday nights I wooed
Whoever I would with my wicked eyes,
The whole of the moon I could love and leave
All the green leaved little weddings' wives
In the coal black bush and let them grieve.

When I was a gusty man and a half
And the black beast of the beetles' pews
(Sighed the old ram rod, dying of *******),
Not a boy and a bit in the wick-
Dipping moon and drunk as a new dropped calf,
I whistled all night in the twisted flues,
Midwives grew in the midnight ditches,
And the sizzling sheets of the town cried, Quick!-
Whenever I dove in a breast high shoal,
Wherever I ramped in the clover quilts,
Whatsoever I did in the coal-
Black night, I left my quivering prints.

When I was a man you could call a man
And the black cross of the holy house,
(Sighed the old ram rod, dying of welcome),
Brandy and ripe in my bright, bass prime,
No springtailed tom in the red hot town
With every simmering woman his mouse
But a hillocky bull in the swelter
Of summer come in his great good time
To the sultry, biding herds, I said,
Oh, time enough when the blood runs cold,
And I lie down but to sleep in bed,
For my sulking, skulking, coal black soul!

When I was half the man I was
And serve me right as the preachers warn,
(Sighed the old ram rod, dying of downfall),
No flailing calf or cat in a flame
Or hickory bull in milky grass
But a black sheep with a crumpled horn,
At last the soul from its foul mousehole
Slunk pouting out when the limp time came;
And I gave my soul a blind, slashed eye,
Gristle and rind, and a roarers' life,
And I shoved it into the coal black sky
To find a woman's soul for a wife.

Now I am a man no more no more
And a black reward for a roaring life,
(Sighed the old ram rod, dying of strangers),
Tidy and cursed in my dove cooed room
I lie down thin and hear the good bells jaw--
For, oh, my soul found a sunday wife
In the coal black sky and she bore angels!
Harpies around me out of her womb!
Chastity prays for me, piety sings,
Innocence sweetens my last black breath,
Modesty hides my thighs in her wings,
And all the deadly virtues plague my death!
 Oct 2014 Tiffanie Noel Doro
Anna
my heart beats fast & my hands shake
i should have stayed at home today
i try to escape my own mind
tug at my clothes & count the time
i can't sit still but i can't move
my mascara runs more than i do
I won't flash you a scowl, I'll flash you a smile.
It stings a lot worse and burns for a while.
To face this day in the still of night
How brave am I to tears
And decades of time
Wrapped in memories
“I messed up.”
I only wish it didn’t
take you this long
to realize.
“Can we talk?”
My whole body aches,
yearning to say yes.
“Are you there?”
Yes, I am here.
“Please answer.”
I surely don’t think
I have that strength.
“I still love you.”
My heart beats,
my stomach churns.
“You were the best
thing that ever
happened to me.”
Funny,
I used to think the same
about you.
“Why aren't you answering?”
“Because for 7 months;
I waited.
You tore me apart,
it felt like I was drowning.
You didn't even look back.
Not once.
How can I just forget that?”

I hit send.
“I’m sorry…”
“I’m sorry too.”*
Except this time,
I don’t hit send.
"When what you want isn't what's good for you, that's when you need to learn to walk away."
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