it's 5 a.m.

you’re tired ,

that's the only time

you seem to want me.

whether it's alone

in your bedroom

under the sheets

or it's with your friends

in a crowded cafe,

it's only when you’re tired.

when you’re awake,

you won't put your lips on my edges.

you’re too busy touching over lovers,

rummaging through papers,

calling your friends,

laughing.

you seem to forget who woke you up.

who made you warm.

and tomorrow you will be tired again

and i will still let you

put your lips

on my edges

though i know

when you're awake

you won't need me.

but

my heart is bigger

than my head.

i am

so so warm,

and you are

so so cold.

cold enough to use me.

i - warm enough to not care.

because

you are so much happier

when

you’re awake.

I watched a hummingbird
hovering, suspended
during flight
wishing
I could be it
for one night
it looked so free
without a care
at the same time
so aware
that life was good
it understood
He flew away
to let me know
he couldn't stay
reminding me
to enjoy my day.

I have a one heart song
and, it’s dancing in my head
yes, it feels like a warm Spring breeze
and, it’s just around the bend
No, need to wait
let’s write our song
right now instead
we can add some Stars
and, we’ll add our own guitars
we can mix it up a bit
and,
add a string Quartet —

I think this world could use a song
about all that’s good not wrong
they’ll be cheering in the streets
and, dancing to our beat

The sun will begin to shine again
the wars will finally stop
n', end —

I have a song for you
about Red, White, and Blue
it’s about Uniting us
as one
including everyone
the old, the middle—
and, the young

And, they’ll be cheering in the streets
while they’re dancing to our beat

It’s a one heart song
Yes, where everyone gets along.

Don't act as though my opinion
Matters to you
At all.

Grant me the words
"I don't care."

So that I don't waste my precious thoughts
On your unworthy ears.

I
cannot sing
hardly speak
but my fingers
can press the keys
can pluck the strings
I
cannot sing you a love song
but I
can write a tune
so long
so dark
so deep
it'll make you close your eyes
make up your own lyrics
and you won't need to hear my voice
to know exactly how I feel

An angel spoke in a dream
offering advice
for a more spiritual life
Settle the mind
settle the soul
I said it was hard
not easily done
meditate more
Then I replied,
I'll pencil that in
between looking for work
n' the sh&te; that I'm in
She whispered,
Relax, relax
I'm right here!
You really have nothing to fear
then I woke,
with angel feathers laying near.

Once you were so sweet
you had a gorgeous smile
once you played guitar
I stayed there for a while

heaven opened up
you owned the place
slipping away so slowly
now its hell I taste

The memories of all that we shared
can't be forgotten, can't be compared
will I recover, oh I'm so scared
my heart full of rain and
your the one to blame

Oh, you never tried
the more that I knew, the more I died
do you have no shame
just shatter my pride
and your the one to blame

am I a fool, waiting around for you?
when I know its something you'd never do.
you pushed my love aside, that's something I cant abide
And your honestly the one to blame...

Scribbling away on my walls,
have I gone insane locked up in doors?
your the one to blame

why did you hurt me so?
you always had to be in control
never letting me In, just letting yourself win.
what did I do, why can't you love me
am I invisible, cant you see?

Oh, you never tried
more that I knew, the more I died
I got a reason now to bury you alive
What do you think about that?

I don't think ill be OK
I can't believe, you could treat me this way
I do believe, you didn't try to stay

I don't think ill be all right
AND YOUR THE ONE TO BLAME.

When I go into plank,
please realize this is not
my showing off yoga talent.
I am an epileptic. Please,
when I fall down convulsing
in your liquor store, which  
I only entered to buy a pop,
know I am not a drunk, so please
do not kick me in the head.
I am an epileptic. I know
how strange it seems to
watch a man go rigid, crash
wide-eyed face forward, ****  
and **** himself, make a stink
of public places. So please,
please do not scream at me.
I am an epileptic. I will
likely come to, but then
comes the *****. I am
sorry for that, more sorry  
than you could possibly be  
for me. My world is as such,
and I did not wish to intrude  
on your day. I will go away,
as soon as I gain faculties,
lift from murk some understanding
where I might be. Embarrassment
is not easy to carry, but I will
take it, stinking, slinking away.
I am an epileptic. I am
so very sorry.