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 Dec 2020 Parker
ghost
Untitled
 Dec 2020 Parker
ghost
I apologized to you
for crying
when I was the one hurting
 Dec 2020 Parker
Me
Soundwaves
 Dec 2020 Parker
Me
All sounds
Speak
To your body you
Keep
None
Kind of a revelation for me.
 Dec 2020 Parker
guin
some things i can still hear in your voice
the most inconsequential, mundane things
almost surprising upon the realization
that the voice in my head stopped being mine
and began being yours

they don't hurt
they don't make me miss you
not in the least

they're just there
as a reminder, i suppose
that i loved once to the point
of accidentally turning them into a permanent fixture in my life
in ways
other than physical
so i can still keep them
when they leave
it was literally just reading and rereading the word "bes" and wondering whose familiar voice it was playing in my head until i realized ****,
 Dec 2020 Parker
Heavy Hearted
be careful-
you dont want to fall in love with me;
Im hard to hold and cold to touch (fall to pieces/treat the rush).
dont fall in love with me
because Im inherently cruel.
You will put me  above all, as the only priority, yet I will never be enough to show you how that feels.
dont fall in love with me
because I will watch you sacrifice, in every moment you thought you knew I will watch as you suffer for what you love. 
dont fall in love with me
because I will lock the door
from the inside so dont wait around,
dont fall in love with me
because I know my worth and I will demand many things, most of which will be a challenge,
yet I'll expect everything unto us for I know what my love does really offer.

Fall in love with me and
my soul will trace you back, and you'll see
I'm a rainy night, the silent snowfall in a lonely November; that im the space between each eyelash when you grin.  I'm a sunset that hangs over the smoking, foggy lake, and im the tiny hairs that cover a raspberry.
Im a song
and a poem and an epitaph alike
Im the dirt gravel path in the forest you hike.
I'm the wind and the rain
Im the first sip of tea
Im a warning to head,
Im the deep dark blue Sea,
Im whips of hard smoke,
perplexities
Im only what you want me
to be.
x free verse x
 Dec 2020 Parker
lua
feel
 Dec 2020 Parker
lua
it's the ache in my chest
and the tingle in my palms
the ***** of tears at the corner of my eyes
that makes me think
makes me wonder
what it is to truly feel
what love is like
as young as i am
and as innocent as i seem
amidst the world
desensitised
and numb
i don't understand
and maybe that's okay for now
because from my own experience
from what my own fingertips feel
from what my eyes have touched
and from what my ears have solemnly listened
it is a kind of pain
we often yearn for.
 Dec 2020 Parker
Parker
My true sickness
is that I never feel more loved
than when I'm on my knees for you
And I crave it more than anything
 Dec 2020 Parker
J
you say that you,
when something happens,
choose fight over flight.
yet. whenever I'm in trouble
or sad
or panicking
or numb
or angry
or bloodied
or bruised
you run, you freak out, you leave, you
vanish.
you fly away, raven.
so perching myself on this boney finger
of Death's
I, the crow, will caw
until you return
"to protect."
u h h
 Dec 2020 Parker
ghost
death
 Dec 2020 Parker
ghost
love is a feeling so mutual
with an ending so brutal
life's a game
were all the same
we have different names
yet were burning in flames
in the end
to death is where the angels send
so don't love
live
or feel
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