at your first swimming lesson, they teach you to breathe through your nose and let air out through your mouth to avoid swallowing water and although i listened closely, i may have missed a step because i am sick to death of wishing myself six feet underground but my love, it's not an easy feat to breathe with litres of salt water flooding your lungs

hot baths, breakdowns, too close, too loud. lost, alone, confused, worthless. self-image, self-confidence, self-love. questions. "What do you want to be when you're older?" "Where are you going to college?" "How are your grades?"
How are my grades? How am I! I'm breaking down every night, crying in the shower, trashing the organized file cabinet of my mind, scouring every inch of my consciousness trying to find out who I am. Emotionally unstable. Lost. Mentally unstable. Lost.
Ask me how I am.

Cozy sheets, cold feet,
Fleece blankets, thick-feathery comforter,
And a crackling fire beneath the stars,
You & me with nothing in between,
But the calm of the night & the ocean breeze.

The world has come to a hault,
Time does not exist,
It's just you & me with nothing in between.

tonight i realized
that you do not entirely belong to me

and that the best days
really are the first to flee

I can taste *****,
and it sounds like you.