I sat on top of the world; everyone knew my name
Now I try to find my way back, all I know is shame

My cars; crashed into parties, everyone wanted to be in my fancy wear
Why didn’t I look up investing and insuring; now I don’t mind if its rag, please just give me something to wear

My name was held in high esteem, white line called to me from Whitney’s rear
She never came back for me, but watched as I derail

Day and Night, I looked up to Whiskey, it became my religion
Now at the altar in search of salvation from the true religion

                           ♚
                   Kunbi Dia

Dear Whitney,


I was a thought in my mother's imagination when you were in your prime and now that I'm in mine I need you back more than I need mine. You would've known what to say when that man entered my sacred space. Can you believe they haven't figure it out yet?

Whitney you danced for you and no one else. No one could love you like you did, not even your devoted fans. You let no one call you broke and call you a crack fiend. Instead you powdered your face and continued on with your day. But baby yours isn't translucent.

Sister Houston you died when we needed you most. It was you who could lift every voice with just yours and sing for all the colors in the wind. You left me all alone before I got a chance to fall in love with your overbearing spirit. There was no room left in my body for God after I filled myself with hate.

Whitney I never learned how to love. I tried listening to the legacy you left on my iPhone and reading articles on how to be better. I been screaming for somebody's love for so **** long that I'll dance for anybody. In this story, I've become you Whitney. This is The Bodyguard now and ol' boy from Field of Dreams is coming for me. To you my love, if you build it I will always love you.

And lastly Whit, what's the afterlife really like? Is worth it? You know, leaving me behind?

Whitney went fishing in the pond,
She wasn't alone too long,
But...she got mixed up with ****,
She should have bought a gun,
Definitely O'Deed the wrong one,
Not her idea of fun,
Whitney wasn't on her own too long,
Now we can't hear her songs,
She should have bought a gun,
Definitely O'deed the wrong one.......

Despite your sorrow, your grief,
your smile stayed sweet
giving warmth as you
maneuvered through the world,
a solitary, inner orphan
since that awful time a few years ago

The heavy pain you carried
that wouldn't let you be

The unanswered conundrums that
resisted parsing for one so young

Yet all along, there was the inherited voice
lying quietly within you

like a sleeping bird's
awaiting the dawn

desiring to sing again
in splendorous tones

a new day's joyful awakening

February 3, 2015