i hear
the birds fly
overhead,
their chirps, squeaks
and squawks
inviting me
outside
to join the
morning party.

Laying pain over pain
I cut into my spirit
again,
blood on my sleeve and
who could believe that
such hurt was conceived in
the heart?

Self harming's a charming
expression which hides the reality as the blade slices into me and my tears like the hot blood start running free,
hurting me to stop hurting me which hurts me even more and what for?
few could understand and fewer would even try,
at times like this I feel like the time is ripe to slice again to cut and bleed and cut to feed the gaping mouth of depression.

Self expression should never take the knife to cut out the things that ache.

If I break and take the blade to slice the pain,
If I make again this cut to cut out pain will it go away?

One day
I say, some say
we all say
one day.

One day I'll cut it all away
and feel the pain
no more.

You sit there at the window
Watching the rain wreck havoc on the aged trees
Wondering "when will your life begin"
Searching for that prince charming to gallop in
Snatching you out of your window
To take you back to his white castle as his bride

To you, yes you who sits and dreams
I ask did you ever try stepping out?
To feel the rain dampen your skin
And feel the piecing cold run shivers down your back?

Did you ever try to speak out
Voice your opinions perhaps
Maybe those hidden emotions
To the ignorant soul who knows not your existence?

Maybe just maybe if you stepped out
Lived a little
And stopped shunning things in fear
Maybe if you made mistakes
Had your heart broken
Tripped and fell into the mud
And had your dreams crushed to dust
Perhaps seen a loved one die
Maybe if you lived through the hardships of time
You could say you lived
You could say your life was worth something
Not to anyone else
But just you

In the end after all
It is yourself you have to live with