Fighting in the kitchen
Fighting behind closed doors
Screaming matches they won’t even hide
Threats of leaving
Who knows who said it first?
They were never happy,
So we weren’t either.

Then they split
Split months,
Split holidays,
Split lives
Two houses
Two parents
Two versions of me
Two influences in my head
Telling me who to blame
Who to trust.

I became a peacekeeper,
Messenger, translator,
Or liar

Clothes kept in bags
Packing up pieces of my life every week
Moving back and forth,
But I’m stuck in between
Just me,
Pretending I’m okay-
Trying to stay whole

I’m like this because of them.
So much was happening.
I had no one.
I couldn’t talk.
I couldn’t share.
It’s too late now.
They’re there but it doesn’t help,
I’m too far gone.

It makes me dream for something
But now I don’t know if it’s possible
I just want love
And happiness,
A perfect family
What is it like to feel whole?
What is it like to not have a broken family?

pick one out of billions
and stick to it
like spider bait
in the spider web

although you never know
when you’re caught
until it’s too late
and you’re in
too deep

the heart fills
with betrayal
and deception
or worse
the heart fills
with truth
when our beliefs
are based on lies

it’s hard to comprehend
and/or overcome

the ego gets scratched
or the connection
gets snipped

and finally,
a plumage of misconceptions
is what we’re deduced to:

that something is lost
that something has failed

but when the perspective
is turned upside down
and the lens adjusts itself

it reveals that something
is gained and/or returned

and this time
with a fresh start,
a new beginning,
a better outlook

maybe a lesson can be learned?
maybe a mistake can be avoided
by it’s reoccurrence?

maybe?

but listen,
I’m no love guru,
couples therapist,
marriage counselor
or divorce attorney

I can only guarantee that
there is another pair of
sweaty meat sacks
encased in decaying flesh
waiting for you
somewhere out there,
aching to ruin your life
all over again.

I feel the need to ****,
It's all about the thrill,

What, such things I would never do,
Who the hell are you!

Oh, I'm you and you are me,
Now I'm going on a killing spree,

We're both here and share control,
But you know... things take a toll

You're about to ruin my whole life,
Stop! Put away the knife!

No no no, my friend,
Let's see how much their bones can bend,

But if you would...,
That's not good,

I need to put an end to this!
But what are you gonna do, Miss?

I don't know...,
In the meantime I'll cut off this toe,

Just watch and plea,
I'll set you free,

No you will not,
If you could you'd let me rot,

Wait I'm no longer in chains,
From whom are these open veins?!

How many did you ******!
Oh I would go much further...

Ever since way back, when I was small.
I had dreams of a woman, I knew not at all.

Try as I might, to catch a glimpse of her face.
The moment I awaken, all I saw would erase.

Every single night, as I arrive in my dreams.
She would show me that reality is not as it seems.

Her presence is not part of time and of space.
Outside of my dreams, I can find not a trace.

I look very closely at all those I meet.
Even the people, I pass on the street.

Hoping to see her, or that she’ll find me.
Recognizing we make up, two parts of the three.

I see now that I am just farther along.
Waiting for her, to put words to my song.

Looking at time back from here to the past.
She’s always with me, like a shadow I cast

Stop worrying about things, that you know to be true.
The secret behind why, we are split up in two.

Two people will form

a community, any --


trio will split up.

Gentle seas reflect light near the island of Brac
Local men tender their allotments early in the morning
Swifts start to dart about
A local lady carries herbs and flowers down hill to the restaurants

Old men gather for coffee and cigarettes
People carry bread and cherry baklava from the bakery
The butcher's door is always open, he is working hard
Tourists sprint about in a hurry

Kids play cards as if it's the 1970's
Ladies show off dramatic tattoos on their backs
Walking down the steps to the beach
I sit near the outdoor shower and relax, getting ready to dive in

Shining lights on a Dalmatian shore
Broken little mirrors on an aqua sea
provides the backdrop for boys wrestling on a concrete diving board

Girls soaking each other with a push button tap
The thin old man in speedos intervenes
One hand holding a roll up
The other gesturing in Croatian

The setting sun behind the city of Split
Is a rusty heat haze for swallows to dart over
Truffle oil fills the air from the cafe
A couple use sign language to speak as the sea roars in

Backs and shoulders covered in beautiful inked art with Angels, crosses and devils
Pine trees provide shelter on the stony beach
Families playing cards and laughing.

The church bells signal it is time to go in
We start up the hill and look back at the sky.
A night to remember and a night to repeat.

Baby please
Tell me what you need
I promise I'm trying
To take on the lead
You are small but not weak
Your voice is quiet when you speak
But do you know you move mountains
Like you do it with ease?
You take on this cruel world
All it's edges and swirls
You give us the strength we need
When my mind is unfurled
I know it's not fair
And I know that your scared
Your small hands take the wheel
As the rest of us stare
You're reckless and wild
You're still just a child
I promise I'm fighting
To get this reconciled
You deserve to be free
To give the power to me
One day I promise you
I'll help you find peace