I am Mexican:
       Brown and forgotten inbetween,
       Brown like the dirt poor I am.

Iv'e been in hard labor:
      I do what "they" don't want to anymore,
      I am the backbone of the working class.

Iv'e been poor:
      I see no handouts under the pyramid scheme,
      I am the Latin prince of the ghetto.

Iv'e been a hustler:
      Every penny earned off my back
      Makes dollars for "their" pockets.

Iv'e been here:
      I am no *******,
      I am the American dream,
      Still I must show identification.

I am Mexican:
      Brown and four generations deep
      American, I am still
      The immigrant face.

he wanted to be the
redwood tree among the giants
but she refused to be
his sun

he wanted to be the lion
hunting in the wild
but she refused to be
his jungle

he turned every direction
and became dizzy
and looking for his balance
he turned to her
but she refused to be level

he tried to become a romance
but she was too hurt
he turned himself into light
but she always carried
a blanket of dark

he decided to become
a man
and though she refused to still be
a woman
he decided to love her
anyway

There are thousands of us here
In this small part of the internet.
We are thousands,
Voices of all natures.
I wonder how many in all
The corners of the world?
Here alone are thousands
Which plant seeds of philisophical change
And the evolution of our society.

How many words will it take
To declare the state of humanity
As the world goes deaf and blind?

Every once in a while I see a poem
With a national headline,
Some black kid shot by a white cop.
Then the poem disappears,
The poet and his or her fellow
Writers retreat inward
Jumping into nothingness
Of feelings and self loathe.
We carry a banner with a million
Words and nothing to say in unision.
Oh God, is this the path of the poets?

But suddenly I realise
And I see I am just as shallow
As the next,
The pulse of the world will not
Beat with poets,
Though poets can be the racing pulse
Of change.

Let the poets unite on common ground!
Cry out against something in unision.
We are thousands of voices
That cannot yell.
How many of us here on the internet?

How hard is it to rise against
The machine and bring
About change truly to the soul,
To see ourselves rise up
With our words?
What we speak we will write,
What change we write
Will give birth to humanity.

And when I spoke her freely
My words,
The cage became a bird.
And my heart a frenzy because
It longed for death and
Now howls at her life.
      She smiles at the reflection
Of my words,
What shall I speak to her now?
And the light dances in her smile,
Her seasons burn lilies into
My ideas,
******* my hands
That were gone without hope,
She brings a poet from death.

She punishes the darkness
And all the monsters that ****
Away the blood of life.

In the hour of her fullness
Condensing on my lower lip,
I breathe life into words,
Though it was her name that
Condemned my sorrows to the gallows.

And I am young again,
My eyes speak,
My mouth listens,
And all my life has come to now.
The end is a rebirth
And I fled the dark side of night,
The worn out lonely poet
Has come one more into the light
And for her,
Because it was inevitably her,
It is not too late.

I remember my sorrows
When I destroyed flowers,
The flowers withered in my hand
Because the joy still lingered
In them.

But she has devoured my chaos,
Caged my fears
And loosened the words.

And though I was lost in the abyss,
Surrounded by a prison of regret,
She loosed me from that place,
And the cage became a bird.

He died on a Tuesday.
And I know he must descend
Like vertigo on on a sunshine day.
And must ascend to a new place
Where the infinite beyond he visits
In waves of willow trees
On rolling hills past ancient
Words spoken only in holy places.

And the soul is on a journey
To no particular flesh, laying
Waste to karma and decidedly
Has become new dust to swirl
As old as the soul, so very young
To God infinite.

Outside of time,
A place between spaces
Through cracks like windowpanes
He celebrates his life.
Along the way he will pass
Those who have passed before him,
Whose words have become like
Eternal moments,
Whose lives have known the temporary
And the beauty of unknowing.

Perhaps - maybe...
His soul journeys on into forever
And back again,
Open door of wombs to what
New dreams may come.

He died on a Tuesday
And returned to forever.

In my youth I remember my face.
               Today
As I have lived and breathed
        And died inside many times
And live again in this lifetime;
     I see faces in a mist,
The man in the mirror
          Has no face.

People at the pass,
           Past people
Through a concubine of memory
           Almost insatiably
They remember.
           The shadow from light cast
On open wounds,
           A meadow of grass whistles,
The sounds of children growing
           The invisible in front of us
           Days stretch like morning awakenings,
They are in the bedroom,
           The curtain brushes violet walls,
Coffee clenches a fist in the air,
          The morning mist choking on the sun.
A stain of kisses as she remembers
          The spill of passion
Torn out from the night into a constellation
           Un named
He is walking back,
With coffee cups in hand,
Back to the night before,
         Edges of forever
As home becomes the void
         They fill out the abyss with
Memory surrounded by life
                 Home
The stab of the sacrifice
         The door is revolving
In a collapse of time
         Daily they drink of another
Looking back
                 Moving forward
Memories clear the mist......

Am I accepted here throughout
The poetry world?
Though I am a liar
(But you all know my pain)
And a sociopath,
I still love the make beieve world,
Like dreaming I was naked
In an NFL stadium
And had to run across the field
To a door that kept on disappearing
And reappearing on the other
Side of the field.

I know myself better than my
Psychiatrist does,
But the truth of the lie is
I love the words more than myself,
And the mass darkness I live in
Is filled with a universe of
Make believe.

So I write the Galactic Sea
And yes I am a crazy person,
So I defiled my name and the dream
Became reality.
I believe in my words
And I am hungry for these truthful
Poets who sieze poetry
At its throat and follow
Their scripted verses.
(I hear repetition has much to do with insanity)

Sure I am hungry for love
But Im in a relationship with sedatives,
The sadness of these poet saints
In a mammoth sized disproportionate
Reality,
Ive read my psychanalysis
And it turns out Im a poet with dreams
Who knows the difference
Between a star and a lightbulb.

I slow to a yellow crawl,
I watch the meadows filled
With bloodstained roses,
Beneath crystalline eyelids
I see the fire burns in all directions.

I rush a rush to nowhere,
Everywhere standing still.
I yearn to claw the sky black,
I speak in a the archaic language,
The sorrow understands.

I come forth by action
And spew tattered verses,
I sleep in the blood of dreams
And awaken in secular ******,
Alone with everyone.

The curtain closes on my being,
Neither here or there,
My steps like an echo
Chasing my future steps;
Only the words to me are real.

When summer came in 98'
And the eyes of the momentary
Eternal swam into the Canyon Lake,
It was then the sway of skin
Took me to the place hungry eyes
And kids seeking stimulation went
To cool themselves off.

Under sky bright
I saw her with hips of light,
A second beer and I was grown
Into a man worthy of any woman.
No adults with experience
To guide my ill advised tactic.

A smack on the ***.

At first she turned in complete anger,
Her curves had stiffened her body,
Combat mode and my buddies
Giggling in the backround.
I saw her beautifully frightful hand,
Her slap before we met eyes,
It was mighty and meaningful,
But when I turned from the wallop
To my face,
We met eyes once again,
The most timid of smiles
And a soft apology from me.
She smiled and slapped me once agin,
It was then I knew....
It was then I knew.