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basil Oct 2021
i would like my flannel back
but i don't know how to ask for it
and i really don't want to talk to you
but in my head i know that means
you've won
in a way i really don't want you to win

can you give me back my copy of Paper Towns
i know you didn't read it, but i don't care anymore
if you read it, maybe you'd love me
or maybe it's the opposite, and maybe if you loved me
you would have read it
but i don't have the time to think like that anymore

what i really want back is the two years i spent on you
treating you like a droplet of tortured heaven
giving you all of me to fill the cracks in your heart
but the real cracks were in your head
for letting me give you everything, and never giving back
you didn't even say thank you

but i'd settle for the book and the flannel
alternatively titled: *******, constence. give me back my ****.

god, i literally hate that i made excuses for you. **** i hate thinking about this. the more i think about it the more ******* mad i get. i'm done.

10.31.2021
Casey Mar 2019
I had those random thoughts again.
Such as; how people pick you last for the first game of the semester played in a gym class, even though they don't know how good or bad you are.

It's off of appearance alone, which is *******.
"Oh they look thin, they're probably not good at (sport)."
What the **** does that have to do with anything?

When we played soccer, I showed up everyone else,
even though I was picked last.
They had the nerve to say to me, "Wow, good job!"
As if the notion that I was good at a sport was some sort of miracle.

Whatever.
Not like I played soccer for eleven ******* years.
Not like they knew that since sixth grade.

The way they say, "Wow, good job!", makes me sick.
They say it to me as if I'm unable to be good, just because they perceive me to be horrible at sports.
They sound so surprised.

Another thing's been stuck in my head ever since I've read Paper Towns.
John Green mentions people seeing mirrors of others as who they believe the person to be.
I find this true.
People love to think that they know someone very well, when they only know the version that they've created.
Green says we need to see through the window to see who the person actually is.

Which seems ******* impossible.
But it's not.
Just talk to them instead of assuming.

They've already built a mirror of who I am.
Of course, it's completely wrong.

I'm not some boring skinny twig that can't talk right.
I'm not smart, and I'm not rude.
I have emotions, and I really care about others, much more than myself, even.

That's not who I am to anyone else, though.
I have these journal entries on my phone that I'm posting here.
It's always risky to love a paper person
He'll always look back at his Paper Town
with his paper personality.

Worst is: paper love can be cut out.
It'll feel good once you move on --
leaving and bringing your cut-out self back
together again.
Lily Jul 2015
Sometimes I wish I was Margo Roth Spiegelman
I want to be able to follow my heart and do the things I've always wanted to
I want to dance with wind
Feel the grass beneath my feet
The stars to blanket me with sparkle
And the moon to light my face
I've always wanted to run
And never look this way again
To be the captain of my own soul
Seizing all the hours of my day
I have feet because I know I wasn't meant to stay on the ground
I wasn't given wings because I know I am no angel
But I knew I was destined to fly
When I die, put this on my grave. Tysm.
thoughts to dump Mar 2015
Invite me to explore every inch of your skin,
I'll be glad to accept the taste of your innocence;
But careful what you do in return,
I tend to make noise silently in sojourn,
And my sense of adventure gets tighter
I'm fictional, so just keep even.
(Title Credits is for the Love of John Green's Paper Towns)
Yoni Sav May 2014
I fell in love with you
amazing paper girl

I want to know you better
amazing paper girl

you only want to be an
amazing paper girl

I must stop loving you
amazing paper girl

Because if I don't
amazing paper girl

I will tear you
amazing paper girl

In my search of
The real amazing girl
EBN I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt you. Plese forgive me.
Yoni Sav May 2014
I am sorry Margo
but I cAn't let go
Even though I tried
I can't leave it aLl behind

every time I Ran away
I found that my waY
is on A track
leaDing me back

in my Home I
always fouNd my
Father waiting for
me aT the door

He would say:
'Son Please don't go away
I love you'
I love you too
For my father. Inspired by Paper towns

— The End —