The devil is beautiful
That's the point
No one wants to be ugly
Beautiful does not equate inherent goodness
Lucifer was god's favorite
so beautiful
so perfect
Vain
He fell
The devil is.
So beautiful.
you can't help but follow him
Track him with your eyes
Fall into his gaze
Actions be ****** because
God is hard
God is divine, a being you can't look at for fear you'll never look back away
God is the type of divinity that strikes feat in nations
The devil is easy
Comfortable
Conventional
Convenient
Do I really want to be beautiful?

I've only recently been able to admit to the idea that I am depressed
No
A person with depression
I know I have things
I have a history
I think in my head an attempt isn't depression
Just a bad decision

Symptoms of depression include
• Irritability
• Difficulty concentrating
• Lack of energy
• insomnia or excessive sleeping

Obviously I don't have those
I'm not irritable I'm probably just hungry
I haven't been able to concentrate my whole life. Why start now
I'm a teenager of course i'm tired
It's not sleeping excessively I just like naps

Its that **** phone
If your room weren't such a mess
Get out more
Socialize
There's light at the end of the-

Shut up

Two years ago I tried to end my life
Downed a bottle of pain meds and a canister of albuteral
All to wake up with just a sore throat
It didn't work so here I am again
Against my own worse judgements
Too tired to try again so I'm just gonna go to sleep

So now I'm going to sleep
tomorrow I will remember how to be happy.
And then by 2pm I'll forget again
Completing the circle

I don't think the world would comprehend what I mean when I say I have intuitive thoughts.
When I say I think about grabbing a knife from the cupboard and
I'm not gonna finish that one
The thoughts bleed from my head.
I look like carrie
Obscene words cover me from top to bottom
Next time you get in the shower you should water board yourself
Put a fork in the microwave and watch it explode in your face
Get ready in the morning with a nice ice bath for your face, just use boiling water
Clip your nails, clean off. Keep cutting.
You should shave until there's nothing left
Bleed
Cut
Bleed
But those intrinsive thoughts aren't silly and funny
So i'm gonna stick to
You should eat that whole jar of nutella

I've never been in love but I can imagine it
Matching fits, talking bout cats n ****
Be my man ill be your *****
Ride or die
When I'm with you we'll fly
Superman, cheer for you in the stands
Here for you till the end
My man will be perfect
Absolutely no flaws he'll have it all
Speed dial no need to call
Cause my man will have it all
Cause my man
My man
I haven't met you yet and I know you'll be perfect
Because in the ocean of my dreams I see you surfing
I'm learning
That everything i do is leading up to you
And everything you do and see is for the moment you meet me
Don't that just make you cheese
The duo we'll be
whole world to see
My man and me

When words fail what's left?
Song?
My praises singing
Hands?
I gesture, paint worlds with my movements
When words fail do we write?
Put my pen to paper and let the words spread like watercolor
Words
speech, are all I know
Silence is a foreign language to me
When words fail I have little left.
So I pray my words do not fail.
Because words are mine.