Sometimes I love my reflection.  
Other times, he's just a bad friend—fixing his lips like he's about to interrupt me before I get my thought out good.  
When I stop speaking, so does he.  
What do you expect? He's me. ****.  
In truth, the bills are paid, and all current business is handled. But something is missing. It’s obvious. He just looks and shakes his head—my reflection.  
I'd be lying if I said I didn't care.  
I've gotten used to the silence that follows me. It's peaceful.  
When I make it home after a long day, if I touch something, I know where it is.  
If I cook something, I know there's more, even if I don't eat it all.  
He sits back and watches all of this.  
My reflection. Half the time, I pay him no mind. Sometimes, it's better that way.  

But sometimes, I wouldn't mind a bit of noise

i believe it was a tuesday morning!
i remember i had a reason to wake up -
to squeeze the last bit of toothpaste
from the tube.
to get right back in the ******* loop.

i believe i caught a glimpse of a child
through the foggy bathroom mirror,
laced with my minty breath.
it felt strange...
i took offense at his looks,
the way he eyed me down.
in his defense though,
i had caught him with his guards down.

he didn't say much,
not that he did anyway.
just nodded softly at me,
whispered almost,
'alright! guess i'll be going then...'
with a flicker of a smile
never to be seen again.

i believed at the time it was best for him
to not see the light on my face go dim
didn't realize then i'd pay such a solemn price;
as I let him go, not thinking twice.

i believe it came quite naturally to me -
finding good reasons not to be.
that day, i found yet another;
it was just enough to help me see -
the error of my ways...
like a rat in a maze, how i end up
reliving the worst of my days.

i still believe i could turn things around.
give the kid a reason to be proud.
i'd whisper softly into the foggy bathroom mirror,
'we're ok, little buddy...
everything's going to be ok!'
i believe i could get him to say,
'alright... i'll stay!'

You've got this, don't give up the fight,

Keep pushing forward, shine with all your light.

Believe in yourself, you're strong and bright,

Your dreams are near, just hold on tight.

Don't let fears stop you, face them with cheer,

You'll overcome, and banish all fear.

Take small steps, keep moving ahead,

Success awaits, in every step you've said.

You're amazing, unique and bold,

Your future's bright, your story's yet untold.

Get up, stand tall, and shine,

Believe in yourself, you're divine.

You're special, one of a kind,

Make your mark, leave your shine.

Be brave, take the first step too,

And watch your dreams come true

Don't give up, keep moving ahead,

You'll reach your dreams, and succeed instead.

Okay so my poetry is my journal. I hope you think it's worth the time. When I say you it's either the audience or someone I won't name. I have always known that I was insane since I was in middle school.
You Have No Idea, if you do then congrats to you.
You Have No Idea, my anxiety and depression can get so bad it feels like being torn in two.
You Have No Idea, my bipolar disorder goes through all of my emotions draining me of my summer tan to a pale tone.
You Have No Idea, I am a high functioning sociopath just no one will say it out loud, I have a heart and a mind, I notice things other people don't.
You Have No Idea, look me in the eyes, see I am human too.

I tried to lock him out
But he somehow found his way back in
The monster, the dark mist that slowly takes hold of my body
Until his tendrils wrap around my limbs and throat
Rendering me unable to breathe or to speak
So I curl up in bed and wait it out
"This feeling is fleeting," I repeat
It stays long enough to rid me of any flicker of hope,
extinguishing any sparkle in my eyes
Leaving me numb
Alone to pick up the pieces
Until he chooses to visit again