Set I
My closet is full of obscure sorrows
How do you give CPR to a heart that's hollow?
I wish I had the desire to care less about things
This inception came from people cutting my heartstrings
This monkey on my back won't loosen my grip on life
Its claws gnaw into my back like a corkscrew knife
I've made too many fumbles near the end zone
I doubt the success in my life with emotions I must condone
Once upon a time, I played life loosely
I cut off my ears and was deaf to the wise
Life's tsunami washed me away from paradise
Cutting off core friends sunk my heart acutely
I treated my life as a volleyball game
Kept everything weighing me down in the air
The risks, the lessons, bounced freely in the hands of others
It was only a matter of time before I was betrayed by my brothers
Before I blamed my failures on everyone else
Without examining my dysfunctional intellect myself
I tried to rely on others; I was left in the ocean to wallow
Learning from my actions I pieced together a fragment of sorrows

I wish that you were like one of NASA'S
Prime, starry, space-bound satellites
So that when these tears fall,
You would locate the source
& Curse a thousand words coded in binary
To spill out, sugarless, filling an organized void.

And before you ask, no, this void is not my brain
Because despite claiming I don't know what to say,
I am not speechless, but rather,
A hundred words combining a second chance
That I am afraid I will pick an unforgivable combination.

Our hearts are not lock and key,
No, they are skies full of passing clouds
That never seem to be able to stop touching,
Whenever they find each other's company.

I fear you will take these eyes
And shatter them like glass orbs
When they bend light
Just so that you can say that I never saw it in us, too.

Never saw the countless times
You've lost your footing
And landed in my arms because
Touching each other felt like the
Warmest thing to wake up to.

You've no longer a stray whisker,
No eyelash on your cheek.
The stars aren't even out tonight,
And this is all adding up.

There is no more of a chance
To make a wish upon us.
And tarot card after tarot card,
Each petal off of a daisy
Will never educate me again
On whether you love me or not.

I fear there's another world out there
One you've already seen;
A city you've fallen in love with,
And I can't even hitch a ride to see you
In a town I still adore.

I've known from the start:
There's something about you.
But I can't tell if it would hurt any less
Than to give it up
And say 'we gave it a go'.

I want to know that you can see me, still,
With the same eyes
You would fall into a trance through.
And I'll keep writing letters to you
On my bones
Just to know that you can finally see:
**You're in my core.