you awake, and your blood
it’s changed, wrong color,

which color matters not, just,
it isn’t what’s supposed to be,

the wound that wasn’t there yesterday,
won’t/isn't being healed, somethings wrong

you don’t need to admit the admission,
no supposition, the truth, it will out you

wearing the weariness in/on your eyes,
your forehead and anywhere it matters

even strangers double take, cross over the
street to avoid visiting your visage

sometimes it can’t be helped, enormity
seems insufficient to redress overwhelming

gonna give up this wretched writing gig,
recording date & time futile & unimportant

the everything everywhere every day is
well past  the Nevery, but specificity is not

yeah gonna take a breather, a whole season,
put aside the reasons, no more deep cuts

when the portico spaces shout, sorry ,closed,
in spades, but you don’t feel it or care

go off and cater to yourself, knowing in
advance, that work won’t advance you past

the point of return, who, you’re too wounded,
no forward, the past is clout clouded, rough

the word some is a totality, what you got,
is something else, & need another something

taking a break from fools and friends, at now,
ain't any difference, gonna lie down, yeah,

lie down or lie up
because


sometimes it helps

We only live once but that’s alright.
As long as we find our love
and our light.
You’ve shown me a way
to make it through the nights.
You helped me in a way
that I never can tell.
You showed me love
and brought me out of my shell.
So I need to thank you now
For  pulling me off the stairway to hell.

Happy. I am fine.
But there is this part of me that isn't.
That is still broken inside out...
This burden I have.
Stones of smoke laid in my heart.
I try plucking them out myself...didn't work.
I am dying while living.
Sad while happy.
Broken....while healed.
I cast my burdens to you, Lord.
You asked me to.
You want me to.
You would not let me slip and fall.
You never rest.
Thank you.
As I lay...helplessly helped.

When a boy tells you his fears,
Hoping you'll understand,
But you can't even hear,
His voice screaming for your hand.

When a boy hides his face,
Covering it like his blanket,
He'll always hate it,
Like a muscle always aching.

When a boy shows you his hands,
All that he’s ever grasped,
But he's never held yours,
Too afraid it won't last.

When a boy shows you his eyes,
How they’ve seen hell,
He'll want you to try,
To know how you've helped.

When a boy gives you his heart,
Covered in all its shame,
You don't seem too far,
But close enough to fade.

When a boy opens up,
Speaking of fears,
He'll hope you'll love,
When he calls you “dear.”

When a boy gives you his pain,
And expects you to feel it,
He'll yearn for the rain,
Ask for the healing.

When a boy shows you his hands,
How they’ve been empty,
He'll never demand,
For you to be lending.

When a boy tells you his dreams,
Wanting you in them,
He'll want you to see,
You're his precious gem.