Along the corridors
Of oblivion
Footsteps are not heard
Voices are stifled
Presence, like an apparition
Seen through
Glares of the outside world
Creates an inferno
Only ashes, of your times
Even the clock’s hands
Are too hot to touch
Pushed into oblivion
Crushed by fate
Only you and yourself
Not one hand
To pull you toward the future
From the present
Odd predicament

I have never felt ANY physical pain
that even comes close to the overwhelming **** that is inside of me.
Nothing compares!
And every night I wonder what it would feel like to feel safe.
Safe!
What does that even mean?
I wonder what it would feel like to get up in the morning
and to FEEL alive
and not have to pretend to be alive.
I feel defeated and afraid.
And my body plays this cruel joke of breathing
living ~ when nothing else inside of me sees a reason too.
And if there is no little girl there is no pain.
That's what I need right now.
That’s what I want right now
She is way too much!
She is evil and poisonous.
And the only way to make it stop is for her to go away –
no matter what that takes
no matter what the consequences.
She will never know what it’s like to live without the feelings of fear.
She will never feel safe.