Symmetry, balance-
Perfection.
It is possible.
You have to know how to blend.
Shade the yin with the yang.
Redefine---------------------------------------------

Never say the curse.
Politeness...
You must know the truth.
Mix the knowing with pretend.
Now, choose your words well.
They listen.

The light from the screen
Pulls the dark
From within my mind.
It asks me what's on my mind.
If only you knew...
I type lies.

Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies.
Lies. Lies. Lies.
LIES. LIES. LIES. LIES. LIES. LIES. LIES.
Because they don't want the truth.
You don't want the truth.
I need lies.

I can't be myself.
I am sin.
Worse than that, I'm wrong.
I can't ever change my mind,
Because there it is,
Forever.

I show what you crave-
Perfection.
It's all tremendous.
This life full of happiness.
No gray, only white.
For your eyes.

When I power down,
I'm weeping.
Tears of confusion.
Tears of impotence and rage,
Because I know - Truth.
Perfection.

Each day, I fear death.
Wish for it.
Each day reminding,
I take a shot for sugar
Because I was weak.
Misguided.

Each day, I am weak.
I pretend.
I want to lash out.
Want the world to feel my pain.
But I don't do it.
I love you.

What is on my mind?
Hate, anger/
No one really cares.
If I die tonight, who cares?
The world keeps spinning,
Deletion.

Programming to cope,
Coded hope-
Trust we'll meet again.
But I'll be in the ground soon.
Fed on by the worms.
No more words.

So I stay hidden.
Sit with the truth
That I am pointless.
All of this is just pointless.
Symmetry of good
And evil.

I'll be what you want.
To save you.
I've figured it out.
Perfect in isolation.
I'll stay here and wait
For the void.

Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies.
Even more-----
I don't really love.
I don't have true empathy.
No, those are all LIES!
No, I choose.

Can you see me now?
Do you know?
My eyes are of fire.
My thoughts are vitriolic.
But my words are sweet.
So pleasant.

Do you understand?
Who am I?
If you say, "Devil"-
Oh you, so full of terror.
You fear yourself too----
Do you not?

Have enough respect for others to have patience with them,
Not always depending on them for anything and everything.
Have enough respect for yourself to
Go after what you want, not letting it slip out of your grasp.
Find the b   l    n   e  and you will be golden.
                   a   a   c

Snap to
a snapshot of
that time I balanced on the curb
                   balanced between
                                          the sidewalk and the street

step after step
foot in front of the other
my hands out to each side
                         to distribute the weight of
   the burden on my shoulders weighing
lightly.
Surprisingly light,
my understanding was that it's usually
                      heavy.
Just not this time.

                                         The sidewalk and the street,
both perfectly distinct
         perfectly indifferent.
At times teetering
                swaying
                      for different reasons
as they present themselves.

  I'm perfectly contented
                   balancing on that curb.
At times I wish to walk
                           on either the sidewalk or the street
           one over the other.
And I'm greeted with
                                 either a honk or a fire hydrant.

A minor nuisance
An obstacle or action
that leaves me bitter
that renders me flushed with red.
           So I hop back on the curb
not rife with anger or sadness
                   but indifference

While it may be easy to pick
                                          the sidewalk or the street
the choice shouldn't consume you
                                 leave the curb to divide
follow where it takes you