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Pride Ed Oct 2014
Cold sunlight fills my
room today. Coffee
from the night before
stains the corners of
my mouth and I
remember to fold the
laundry. I am not
missed when I touch
the same stained
white linen shirt
for an hour. But
someone said they
thought they heard
me crying from the
upstairs window.
Its lunchtime, and all I
have to eat are
complaints about what
someone else did.
I feel as though I
should pass the sugar,
but that may cause alarm.
I only touch what
I am told. I only touch
what I can control. I
think about eating the
dish soap as I show
you the contents
of my stomach
and see the surprise
on your face.
I think its
evening now.
I lose track of
everything now and then.
So forgive me when I say
I don't remember
your name, and which
room of the house
you stay in.
Quit yelling at me
when I'm face down
in the baby's bath
water.
Please quit assaulting
me with IVs
every time we
take unexpected trips
to the ER.
I hate how cold hospitals
feel. They make my
nose runny.
And that doctor needs
to stop telling me
that I should go
away for awhile.
What does he mean anyway?
I'm watched for
several days after.
I think they like
the way I do
the laundry now.
I cleaned out my
drawer and I
fell in love
again with my
station in life.
Its evening again,
and I can't remember
why I was crying
at all.
Tara Marie Oct 2014
Ty
He waits for nothing
trapped inside vendettas of the past.

To compensate for all the pain.
Collapsed by storms, aghast.

Mouthing words into the plated
metal microphone.

Omniscient spy who gawks upon
his wretched monotones.

Patient Dr. Jekyll sits still
with longing looks.

While Heyde is toying endlessly
amongst his fellow crooks.

If only neither played a part,
and both were but a dream,

No plague of silent conflict
would crowd his every seam.

Within the realm of tragedy,
is where his soul endures.

Ty; intrinsic predator
searching for a cure.

And as his restless measures
of feelings coincide,

and harmonies escape his lungs
while beats start to collide,

The distant Dr. Jekyll protrudes
from vacant sleep.

Commences to erode a quiet
conscience, from the deep.

Sudden need for elsewhere
is all that Ty can see.

Every fiber recognizes
where he needs to be.

And suddenly the microphone,
who knows his every pain

is sitting lonely,
mesmerized
by silent noise again.

Ty is but a victim, sullen thoughts
that make him sick.

Never can he compromise,
when all his habits stick.

Forever now ambivalent,
confused and losing time.

Ty knots his laces,
bats his tears,
a façade: pressed and fine.

Ty's dreams are crushed,
disintegrate into the offshore sand.

When all at once he notices,
his life is in his hands.

A straw that Jekyll used before
is laying on the ground.

Heyde is shaking shamefully,
but cannot make a sound.

Ty looks upon the dreams he crushed
and searches for his will

its lined up right in front of him,
dispassion in a pill.
Relapse is sudden, and sometimes unexpected. A story of a friend.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
In this grand catastrophe, I see
Mankind's destiny
For all our history
Is written by the winners
There will never be
A perfect form of amnesty
When books of divine law are being
Written by the sinners

There's no escaping paranoia
No release from ignorance
And pseudo-genius thrives upon
A lack of common sense
There is no one in this world who can
Show you what you are
A depressing waste of intellect
That hides behind their scars

You dwell within what you believe to be reality
No purpose or direction in this mundane gallery
You live with your convictions of inferiority
And out of fear you'll stay right there, still choosing not to see

What was, what is, what could be
The right, the wrong, the gray
The truth, the lies, you won't open your eyes
Because you're too afraid

You bathe in apathy as a form of self-defense
A textbook example
Of a runaway in hiding
You keep yourself in shadow and you do your very best
To stick to the waning shelter of denial

And there's no escaping paranoia
No release from ignorance
And pseudo-genius thrives upon
A lack of common sense
There is no one in this world who can
Show you what you are
A depressing waste of intellect
That hides behind their scars

You dwell within what you believe to be reality
No purpose or direction in this mundane gallery
You live with your convictions of inferiority
And out of fear you'll stay right there, still choosing not to see

What was, what is, what could be
The right, the wrong, the gray
The truth, the lies, you won't open your eyes
Because you're too afraid

And you will live
Until you die
Fearful of failure, refusing to try
Silencing all your desires within
To be something greater than what you have been
And without fail
That day will arrive
When you will decide to open your eyes
And on that day
At last you will see
You could have been what you wanted to be
But on that day
You will realize
That life has passed you before your closed eyes
And you will feel
Bitterness, rage
At the fact that you slept through your whole life
Afraid.
From my anarchist-commune dwelling crusty ******* kid days.
Shamas Hereth Sep 2014
Come to go,
the flux tastes
of salt and iron.

I? Then, a  
bitter-flavored fool.

Yet by moment
decide, oh Epitome,
that a stillness should
live, red and violet,
against
my threshold obsidian:
Let that selfishness wend.

I, now apathy
and you to wither.
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