you used to come over wearing my favorite scent
that black bottle of jean paul gaultier you had
a quiet gesture, maybe the only hint
that you might have cared

it wrapped around me, got under my skin
soaked into my sheets like you belonged there
even after you left, i could still feel you all day
your scent softly flowing everywhere
  
i would sleep as if i were holding you
hugging the traces of you left on my blanket
until one night, you lie down beside me again
if i would ever cross your mind by chance

somehow your smell disappeared day by day
replaced by vanilla-scented cigars instead
leaving me nothing to hold on when you are gone
except the ashes of you lying by my bed

rappelle-toi Barbara
ce nom qui résonne comme un chant lointain
un homme français t’a vue sous la pluie battante
et voilà qu’une rencontre fugace devient éternelle

il ne t’a jamais parlé
jamais touché
mais dans ses vers
tu es gravée

une passante
une silhouette éphémère
transformée en immortelle lumière

mais moi, je me demande
en silence et souvent
si mon existence s’efface

ils m'ont parlé
ils m'ont touchée
ils m'ont même embrassée
mais jamais ils ne m'ont écrite

pas un vers
pas une strophe
pas une empreinte dans leurs mots

je me retiens
je me cache
je me replie

rappele-moi Barbara
comment est-ce d'être aimée comme ça?

sous le ciel de paris, un mur disait
"Je t’aime comme un soir d’été"
mais c'était en décembre
et il pleuvait toute la journée

malgré le temps, un feu brûlait
au retour de « la butte aux cailles »
dans mon vieux cœur d'âme
comme celuie de Notre-Dame

sur le chemin du Sacré-Cœur, vers chez lui
mon feu s’est enflammé avec ses lèvres, tout éblouie
pendant que Chet Baker chantait, douce mélodie
j'ai peur, je tombe sûrement amoureuse trop vite

et si demain, tout disparaît?
un souvenir que je ne veux jamais perdre
"Je t’aime comme un soir d’été," disait le mur
mais moi, je t'aimerai comme une soirée d'éternité

how many days did you show up on my door?

how many times did we run each other's arms?

how many times did we meet on that same corner?

how many nights did you fall asleep holding me?

how many mornings did you wake up next to me?

how many times did we look into each other's eyes?

how many times did you play with my hair?

how many kisses did you leave on my body?

how many coffees we've grabbed?

how many movies we've watched?

how many songs we've listened?

how many bottles of wine we've drank?

how many times we've got drunk?

how many times we've laughed?

how many dreams we've shared?

how many days, how many moments,

how many lives could we have fit

into all of time we've spent?

let me save you the suspense,

countless times

but how many of these moments stayed with you?

in how many of them i truly mattered to you?

how many days did you greet me at your door?

none

not even once

of all the cafés and all the places in all the world
i've walked into this one
chet baker was playing on behind

of all the songs and all the melodies in all the world
he was singing this one
you used to sing to me in the past

of all the guys and all the lovers in all the world
only you've crossed my mind
as he sang...

i've called you on those lonely nights when i couldn't sleep

i've called you to fall asleep while you told fairy tales in greek

i've called you every time i got drunk to make you laugh

i've called you every time i felt like i needed someone to cry

i've called you to tell you something happened at school

i've called you to tell you something my mom said about us

i've called you just to show you one more song you'd like

i've called you the next day to hear you singing it on your guitar

i've called you to surprise you by playing "la la land" on my piano

i've called you so we could sing along to the song on the radio

i've called you to talk about my favourite poets and writers for hours

i've called you to listen to you talking about cars and video games nonstop

i've called you to say "i saw you in my dream last night"

i've called you just to hear the way you said my name one more time

i've called you every day, every night and in every chance

i've called you with every name except mine

keep pretending you love her
only i know the way you cried to me
while saying you're only with her
just to imagine as if you were with me

you made it seem like it was so easy to get over someone you love

tell me how you were able to fall in love with the first girl you met right after me

tell me how you were able to look into her eyes without feeling any shame

because the second i look at someone else's, i can do nothing but glance away

tell me how you were able to make her smile without feeling something is missing

because the minute i smile at someone else, i can do nothing but miss our drunken laughs

tell me how you were able to get over me

so effortlessly,

so easily,

so willingly,

as if i almost meant nothing to you

maybe i was meant to be that girl
who is not your first love
and will never be your last
only a random girl from your past

maybe i was meant to be that girl
that would take you so little to replace
only one or two days for you to chase
until you find a one with prettier face

maybe i was meant to be that girl
that would take you so little to forget
no more than to shed a couple of tears
and light a couple of cheap cigarettes

i wish i could be one of those girls
who still have faith in something called love
who still have a heart so naive and fragile
who still can feel those butterflies inside

i wish i could be one of those girls
who can feel their heart is beating
without needing to check if it does
and still have some sparks of love inside

i wish i could be one of those girls
who believe in the concept of "love of your life"
and dream about meeting them in their favorite café
like they've always read in those books of romance

i wish i could be one of those girls
who always see the princess treatment
who are spoiled with nice gifts and flowers
who are worth writing songs and poems for

i wish i could be one of those girls
who aren't afraid of something called love
who don't have a heart so rotten and broken
who don't know the feeling of not being loved

i want to forget you the same way
you forgot about my birthday

i want to forget that i've waited for 24 hours
for you to text me only two words

i want to forget how much i cried on that day
thinking about why you couldn't treat me the same way

i want to forget that you made me pick her birthday gifts
a bouquet of purple lilacs and a green dress

i want to forget how long i kept staring at her pictures
wishing i was the one with the flowers in my hands

i want to forget how you made me think i wasn't worth any of that
even a "happy birthday" message was too much for me to get

i am afraid i won't be able
to escape from repeating
my mom's fate, and end up
with a guy just like my dad

then about twenty years later
i'll tell my daughter on a coffee table
you were my right person, wrong time
with tears in my eyes and a ring on my finger

the other day
my mom was talking about
her right person, wrong time
with tears in her eyes

while trying to comfort her
i told that if it was the right man
the time would be right too
as if i believed that nonsense

she turned me and asked
"do you really think that
your father was my right
person, right time then?"

i will never forget the time when my mom said
"i was about to enter your room then i heard your voice
that you were talking on the phone with someone
it was the happiest you sounded in my whole life
since the first day you were born in this world"

that day she couldn't even knock on my door
because she was afraid that the slightest noise
would make our fragile happiness fade away
while standing still on the other side of the wall
she listened you giving me the joy i never had in life

the woman who raised me, witnessed my entire life
my first step, my first word, my first love
told me i've never been as happy as i was with you
even my mom misses the way you made me laugh
how can i not?

maybe you'd also expect me to say i looked for someone like you
but, i've only searched for guys looked nothing like you

i wanted you to be the only guy with curly hair and brown eyes
i've ever seen in my life who would ripped my heart apart
however i was so blinded by your love that i missed the part
everyone was unlovable without having your features like a piece of art

how am i supposed to love someone who doesn't remind me of you
if i can't have their hair tangled around my fingers longing to touch you
if i can't feel their brown eyes on me when i look away to imagine you
how am i supposed to love them, if they aren't you

i have tried to forget you,
                                 move on
                                       find somebody

somebody like you but not you
somebody i wanna talk to before anyone else
somebody who is so passionate about anything they believe and love

so for years i have modelled anyone i met to you
i wandered around to find the one that could replace you

but now i have realized
                           now i know that

there’s nobody like you
and i was foolish to believe there might have been one

actually it feels so weird that you don't know i have a different hair now
i cut them shorter, dyed them blonde, and got new bangs
also i like them wavy rather than straight now
as you would remember otherwise
you used to notice the slightest change in my hair
and now you have no idea what it looks like
neither do i about your beautiful curls
it's the small things that make me realize
you are not part of my life anymore
even though i know you shouldn't be
i still wish you could see every version of me

i used to make a list of the things i wanted to tell you the next time we talk

but we never did.

so i never had the chance to tell you about

the new greek friends i made
so i could learn some love words to say to you

the new songs i found
that i think you would like and play them on your guitar

the new movies i watched
while imagining two of us as the couples in there

the new playlists i made
where you would see how many songs remind me of you

the new countries i visited
thinking of us dancing on the streets just like we always dreamed

the new poems i wrote
that i hoped you would turn them into songs and sing to me

the new clothes i've bought,
the new recipes i've tried,
the new books i've read.

the new people i've met,
the new memories i've had,
the new person i've become.

so i never had the chance the tell you about
all the things i've done since you left me behind

and i guess i will never have the chance the tell you about
how much i miss talking to you and having you in my life.

but still
despite everything and everyone
something inside of me
-most probably my foolish heart-
believes that sooner or later
we will no longer be apart
from each other

i wonder if your eyes seek for my glance
when you sing her the song you wrote for me
about how you were the last person alive
in a world where everyone died of fake love

i wonder if your eyes look for a place to escape
when you sing her the song you wrote for me
and lie about how it was written for her actually
deep down knowing that you only loved me truly

every night
i close my eyes
hoping to see a dream
of me finding my true love

every morning
i open my eyes
sobbing still to a dream
of you finding your true love

i am afraid that
i will live my life
feeling like a half
searching for you
all around

only to find out
you can never be replaced
by anyone on this planet
no matter how i wound
you will always have a place
in my broken heart…

ne zaman yunanca bir ezgi dolansa kulaklarımda
aklım utanmadan sana gider
çok üzgünüm sevgilim
seni tanımadan geçirdiğim yıllara
ama daha çok üzgünüm
seni bulacağımı sanarak boşa harcadığım zamanlara
dudaktan dudağa
kucaktan kucağa
dolanarak
senin izini aradığıma
çok pişmanım sevgilim
seni tanımadan geçirdiğim yıllara
ama daha çok pişmanım
aşktan gözümün kör olup
beni böyle sokaklarda
seni aramaya muhtaç bırakacağına
farkında olmadığıma

you always treat me like i am a ghost. every time we talk, you freak out and run away to other arms knowing that no matter how far you go, my ghost will haunt you forever

whenever you sing Cornerstone to her in despair of you can’t call her my name

whenever you lay down with her on your bed that you have a dream of me every day

whenever you remember the only reason you chose her is just because she was the most alike to me

maybe she is close enough to hold you in her arms. but tell me darling, is she close enough to be my ghost?

now, i have realized that i have been avoiding listening to Arctic Monkeys since we stopped talking as if i am trying to run away from the things that makes me think of you.

i run away from our songs,
                                     our movies,
                                            and our dreams.

especially, i run away from myself.

i no longer remember myself as the sweet and passionate girl that you loved once. rather, i am cold and heartless like i've never been in the past.

it almost feels like i’m carrying a stone instead of my heart. i am not sure if i’ll ever fall in love again.

as Céline said, you made me feel like if love wasn’t for me.

i would never forgive you for that unless you give “myself” back to me.

Est-ce que l’étranger devant moi 
Que j’ai jadis embrassé de mes bras
Que j'ai jadis regardé dans les yeux
Que j’ai jadis marmonné le nom

Est-ce que l’étranger devant moi 
Que j'ai pleuré des larmes depuis
que tu es parti

Depuis que tu m'as quitté
J'étais laissé tout seul ici
Tu n'as jamais été mort pour moi
parce que

Je t'ai fait vivre dans mes rêves
Je t'ai cherché dans tout le monde
mais

Je n'ai trouvé ta chaleur chez personne
Je n'ai trouvé ton amour chez personne

Est-ce que l’étranger devant moi 
Qu'importe si tu es devant moi
Tu ne peux pas rattraper les larmes
Que j'ai versées au fil des ans

Nous sommes toujours étrangers
À une histoire d'amour finie maintenant

Laying down on his chest
Trying my best to
Hold my tears back
While wishing, it was you
Here in my arms, instead

Yanıldım
Yalnızdım da
Hayallerim geçmişimi öldürene kadar.
Köpeğimi, yıldızlarımı ve sokak lambamı çaldılar

O köpekti
Benimle ağlayan
Şimdi çığlıklarımı bile duyamayan

O yıldızlardı
Beni bağlayan
Şimdi denizlerde boğulan

O sokak lambasıydı
Her gece hayallerime ışık tutan
Şimdi uykusuz ve yalnız bırakan.

Ve o gecelerin ardından
Uyandım yine, benim için karanlık bir güne
Kurumuş birkaç ağaç, kirli bir deniz

Sözleriyle dokunmaya çalışır elleriyle dokunamayanlar
Ondandır sana şiir yazma çabalarım
Belki yazdıklarım kalbini sarıp sarmalar
Birlikte geçirdiğimiz o güzel günleri hatırlatırlar

Sözleriyle dokunmaya çalışır elleriyle dokunamayanlar
Ondandır her gece mektuplarda senin sıcaklığını arayışlarım
Belki seni bana getirmezler
Ama beni senin rüyalarınla baş başa bırakırlar

Sözleriyle dokunmaya çalışır elleriyle dokunamayanlar
Ondandır senin her bir sözüne muhtaç oluşum
Belki şimdi bana ulaşamayacak kadar çok uzaktalar
Ama hâlâ kalbimi senin aşkınla kaplarlar

Ich wollte dir ein Gedicht schreiben
Aber du wurdest mein Gedicht
Jetzt verstehe ich, als ich bei dir war
Dass die besten Tage meines Lebens verbracht habe

Ich wollte dir ein Gedicht schreiben
Weil du der Grund warst, warum ich mich verliebt habe
Und glücklich wurde, und träumte

Umarme mich von weitem
Lass mich nicht gehen
Länger zusammen bleiben

Ich wollte dir ein Gedicht schreiben
Weil ich wusste, dass Gefühl in mir richtig war
Und du warst es wert

Now I remember the day we met
Looking at your face in the morning sun
I’d give anything to live that one more time

It was the last memory I could never forget
Just before you let everything between us done
Don’t say that you love me cause I would believe
Don’t stay beside me cause I would want you still

How could I know you’d make me regret                              
All I ever did was giving you all my love
Not knowing you’d give me none
Not knowing you'd treat me like no one

Now I remember the day we met
Looking at your face in the morning sun
I’d give anything to live that one more time
Just before I leave you behind

Run run running away
I don't want to live this way
I had hope for so long
That can’t have it anymore

How could I know you’d make me regret                              
All I ever did was giving you all my love
But everything between us falled apart
This last goodbye will always be the worst for my heart

Seni seviyorum diye uyandım yine bir sabaha
Güneşin hatrına döndüğü o güzel yüzüne bakınca
Daldım gözlerine ve bağlandım bu hayata
Tut ellerimden, sarıl bana, ol hep yanı başımda

Ich möchte dir ein Gedicht schreiben
Weil du bist der Liebe verdient
Jetzt verstehe ich, dass ich meine Zeit mit falschen verbracht habe
Und zu spät gekommen bin, um dich zu finden

Ich möchte dir ein Gedicht schreiben
Weil du der Grund bist, warum ich mich hinlege
Und stundenlang Musik höre, und träume davon
Tanz mit dir im Dunkeln
Singe mit meinem gebrochenen Deutsch
Schau dir zu, während du mir Gitarre spielst

Ich möchte dir ein Gedicht schreiben
Weil das Gefühl in mir sagt, dass es richtig ist
Und du bist es wert

Je veux chanter des chansons avec toi
Embrasse moi et marmonne à moi
Ta voix est la seule voix que je veux entendre
Courons dans les rues ensemble
Tes mains sont les seules mains que je veux tenir
Tombe amoureux de moi cette nuit
Tu es la seul avec qui je veux être
Jusqu'a la fin de ma vie

Andere alle sehen die Aussicht
In der Natur, aus dem Fernster
Aber meine Aussicht bist du

Ich brauche kein Blatt
Vogelstimmen oder einen See

Ich brauche deine Augen,
Deine Worte und
Ich brauche deine Liebe

Deine Liebe ist wie eine Brücke
Ich bin da
Du bist dort
Wir kommen zusammen, wenn wir unsere Arme öffnen
Aber da gibt es andere

İçimde yarın seni göremeyecek olmanın üzüntüsü var
Buğulu, her an ağlamaklı gözlerini görememenin
Sanki çocukken kırmışlar da seni öyle mahzun bakıyormuşsun gibi Dalgalı deniz saçlarını kalbime dolayamamanın
Elini her saçına götürdüğünde yalnızlığın kıyıya vuruyor gibi
Kırgın, buz ellerinle hayata tutunamamanın
Her sımsıkı sarıldığın eller seni bırakmış gibi
Yere kapanmış kimsesiz ağlayan çocuk sesini duyamamanın
Birini kaybetmişsin de onun sessizliği gibi
İçimde bugünün son gecemiz olmasının dayanılmazlığı var
Geri dönmeyecekmişsin gibi

İçimde yarın seni göremeyecek olmanın üzüntüsü var
En çok da seni bunları başkasına derken duymanın çaresizliği var

Ich kann die Liebe ,die ich für dich habe, in jeder Sprache erzählen
Ich kann deine schönen Augen in jeder Sprache erzählen

Du bist schweigsam
Du bist einsam
Aber ich habe dein Herz geliebt

Ich kann die Liebe ,die ich für dich habe, in jeder Sprache erzählen
Aber ich kann dir meine liebe nicht sagen
Weil ich weiß dass du mich nicht liebst

Yürüyorum yol yok
                                iz yok
Düşünüyorum sen yok
                                   aşk yok
Bir ormana sapıyorum birden
Adımlarımı kaybediyorum
Gözyaşlarımı tutamıyorum
Senden ayrılamıyorum

Adımlarım hızlanıyor
Gözyaşlarım kayboluyor karanlıkta

Birden bir ışık
             Bir umut
                     Gecemi aydınlatan

Bir ay
            Bir yıldız
                      Belki de gözlerin

Hava daha ağarmamış
Gün doğmamış
Işık yok insan yok
Bir ben bir de aşkın uyanık
Göz gözü görmez zifiri bir karanlık
Yavaş yavaş doğuyor güneş
Bitiyor gece
Gölge gibi beliriyor yalnızlığım

Biliyorum karamsarım ama
            Beni hiç sevmediğinin de farkındayım

What do you know about me?
A girl with a glasses and long brown hair
A girl who laughs so much with her ridiculous voice
A girl who is a nerd
Who is shy
Who is sensitive
A girl who needs to be known

Do you know when I feel alone I watch the stars at 4am?
And I give names to them so they don’t feel alone like me
Do you know that I don’t cut my hair because they keep the memories of my life?
Do you know that I cry every time when I see that Chinese movie?
Do you know that I am touchy enough to cry to the smallest details?
No, you don’t
You don’t know my tears
You don’t know my fears

You don’t know, but I am afraid a lot of things in my life
I’m afraid of staying in the confined space
I’m afraid of singing in the people
I’m afraid of running in the rain
Because of fall
I’m afraid of falling into place
I’m afraid of falling in love
I’m afraid of showing my feelings
I’m afraid of stepping forward
Because of mock
I’m afraid of screaming to the people
I’m afraid of breaking their hearts
I’m afraid of talking too much
Because of being involuntarily rude

But behind this coward girl
I am a warrior
I am a fighter
I am a survivor
For my dreams
I revolted against the people
When I wanted to go another town
For my dreams’ school
They said
You cannot go because you are a girl
Because you are shy
You cannot live without your mom
You cannot handle all the difficulties

You don’t see how strong this girl
Do you?
Do you see the warrior, the fighter, the survivor behind those eyes?

A girl sees the cruel world
With her glasses and
A girl remembers her past
With her long brown hair
A girl forgets her sadness
By laughing with her lovely voice

Whenever I see you in the ***
My home comes to my mind
My mother’s haste of preparing breakfast
My father’s stress of being late for meeting
My brother’s crying for food
And I am waiting for you to be cooked
With strainer in my hand
I remember I threw your thin slices into a boiling oil
Which is my mother’s skillful hands sliced
Then I added a pinch of salt because
You know, I and my brother don’t like you without it

How would I know
We were related to our pain
Both of us are feeling the knife in our neck
Both of us are flaming in the fire
The only difference is
You suffer in the ***
I suffer in my heart

Now, I changed
I don’t care if you are
Sweet or insipid
Crispy or soft
Salty or saltness
I just want to eat you from my mother
And with my family, in my home

I WILL
NOT
BE
T
(HERE
WHEN
YOU
C
LOSE)
YOUR
EYES

I am the water
I don't know where am I going
I don't know if I decrease
Or if I increase

I am the water
In your body
I am the enemy
Of your fire

While my hands are waving
Our song blows in my mind
It whispers gravely
Each melody breaks my heart
Like your words

While my hands are waving
I am waiting your rosy voice
Even it wraps me with lies

While my hands are waving
Our song plays on the piano
It is heard brokenly
Like your guitar
Like my feelings
And like us

I was mistaken
And alone
Even before my dreams murdered my past.
They had stolen my dog, my stars and my streetlamp.

The neighbor’s dog
Who shared my tears--
My screams no longer reach his ears.

The stars
That anchored me
Now drown in the depths.

The streetlamp
That every night illumined my dreams
Leaves me sleepless and alone.

And after those nights
I wake up again, a dark day for me.
A few withered trees, a ***** sea.